Opinion by Kip Hansen – 18 March 2021
The New York Times, once one of the world’s leading newspapers, has finally realized that there must be something worthwhile to gain from subscribing to the paper version of their newspaper, other than lining cat litter boxes (which, paraphrasing Robin Williams, if you did so, your cat would then refuse to use as “it would be redundant”).
In a wonderfully useful article “Go Fly a (Newspaper) Kite!”, authored by Tim Parish — who operates My Best Kite, a website devoted to informing and helping kite-flyers — detailed instructions are given for creating a standard diamond kite almost entirely out of a few pages of a newspaper not really worth reading! [ Addition: Some readers have found the link paywalled — all can download just the kite instructions here (as a .docx) or here (as a .pdf). ]
To be fair to our readers in the United Kingdom, it will be equally suitable to use The Guardian for this project. Readers from other countries can report both the appropriateness and their successes from using copies of other of mostly-harmful newspapers in their locales.
Prior warning, besides a strong stomach necessary for dealing with the contents of the NY Times, you will need:
- Four double-page sheets of newspaper
- Plenty of Scotch tape on a dispenser — preferably three-quarter-inch width but half an inch should be OK [ cellotape for those of you using The Guardian – kh ]
- Polyester sewing thread — polyester embroidery thread is nearly as good, with no chance of breakage
- A pen or pencil
- A three-foot ruler or any handy straight edge that’s long enough
- A bamboo or metal skewer, no more than three millimeters in diameter
This ought to be a fun project for those parents whose children are still locked-out of their schools by over-reaching mandates from their elected officials who have fallen prey to the Mass Hysteria that has caused mostly-useless and mostly-harmful governmental responses to the Covid Pandemic.
Note that almost all health experts also agree that getting kids out into the fresh air flying kites will be a good thing – ask me – I’m an expert on kids and on outdoor fun.
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For me, skewering the NY Times is (and should be for you too) habitual. They no longer do journalism, only opinion writing, all to Editorial Narratives written in advance by Editors whom Bari Weiss characterized as “those living in a distant galaxy, one whose concerns are profoundly removed from the lives of most people. This is a galaxy in which, to choose just a few recent examples, the Soviet space program is lauded for its “diversity”; the doxxing of teenagers in the name of justice is condoned; and the worst caste systems in human history includes the United States alongside Nazi Germany.”
The kite should be fun though, I’m going to build one with my three-year-old grandson, so
Have a great kite flying day!
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