There’s no frying in baseball*

Jose Canseco attending the Birthday Party of K...

Jose Canseco says Al Gore is dead. It looks like he's been out in the sun too long. (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

People send me stuff.

Today I learned via Twitter from baseball great Jose Canseco that Al Gore is dead. And here I thought it was just Futurama that thought this:

Jose doesn’t stop there, nooooo, he adds that if we don’t keep fight global warming by wearing flannel pajamas and recycling, and stopping our mass consumption, the polar bears are toast and we are all going to fry.

You really can’t make this stuff up. Here’s Jose’s twitter feed capture:

Predictably, the reaction on Jose’s Twitter Feed is as colorful as many on field arguments in baseball we’ve come to know.

Update: this juxtaposition from earlier in his Twitter Feed is priceless:

Yes, let’s stop all that “mass consumption”.

*For those of you unfamiliar with the pun I made in the title, it is one of the all time great movie lines uttered by Tom Hanks in A League of Their Own.

h/t to Eric Nielsen for bringing my attention to this over at The Slanch Report

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88 Responses to There’s no frying in baseball*

  1. Latitude says:

    Who was it that said she liked her men big and dumb?………………..

  2. Pull My Finger says:

    I’m not sure which is worse. That Jose Canseco is “political” or that someone actually follows his Tweets. That guy was a ass clown even when he was a productive (if tainted) baseball player. Obnoxious, multiple speeding tickets, illegal firearms, beating up girlfriends, stalking Madonna, steroids, coke, and on and on.

  3. Murray says:

    Another great reason to ignore US baseball

  4. Eric says:

    Steroids are bad……m’kay

    (h/t Mr Mackey)

  5. Matt says:

    I don’t know Canseco’s politics or beliefs, but it almost sounds like he is parodying real alarmists in his tweets. If he’s not and he’s being sincere and serious, then ..just wow.

  6. David says:

    I hope this is the result of his account getting hacked, because if those are his actual thoughts then I’m concerned for his safety.

  7. Eustace Cranch says:

    In an earlier post, I got finger-wagged for a satirical comment pointing out something absurd, and was invited to “contribute something of substance.”

    Ohhhhhkay.

    REPLY: From the masthead: current news/puzzling things. Humor helps take the edge off some of the hate mail sent my way every day. – Anthony

  8. dts-01 says:

    And elsewhere, he’s bragging about going 186 mph in his car. He loves the Earth so much, he like to wrap it in his snuggly carbon footprint

    REPLY: Thanks, added that one. Bizarre. – Anthony

  9. Andrew says:

    Why is Anthony following Jose Canseco?

    I mean the days of Canseco and McGuire in Oakland was decades ago…

  10. Dave says:

    I think Jose should run for congress. He makes about as much sense as most and seems much smarter than others.

  11. gator69 says:

    Another ‘climate expert’. I never knew he took so many balls to the head.

  12. Hole Families. Yup. We have a winner. A Moron in Jammies.

  13. ccoyle15 says:

    wow he is almost as smart as Rick Perry

  14. DirkH says:

    Under the post I get an advertisement “Know the warning signs of Alzheimer.”

    Sometimes google’s pattern matching gets spooky.

  15. Ric Werme says:

    reduce reuse recycle morons class in session i complete you of to practice…

    All your base are belong to us

  16. Curiousgeorge says:

    Those who twitter shall be known as twits. Jose is a role model for that subspecies.

  17. Severian says:

    Baseball been belly belly good to me.

    And, next question, what do you think of the log effect wrt increasing CO2 levels?

    Well, let me jus say, baseball been belly belly good to me.

  18. Anything is possible says:

    ROTFL :

    You just know a cause is well and truly lost when Jose Canseco is supporting it……

  19. bobby b says:

    Mmmmm, polar bear toast!

    Damn. Now I’m hungry.

  20. Jimbo says:

    Does anyone know what his lifestyle is like? Is he frugal? You normally find many who berate humans are in fact hypocrites. Al Gore immediately springs to mind.

  21. bobby b says:

    Omigawd. I read some of his twitts. (Tweets? Tweats?) I could feel brain cells fleeing through my ears in protest.

    “Hole families used to sleep in one big bed and produce no waste.”

    Well, yes, Jose, they could do that because they were all dead by age 14. A dead person is a green person.

    For a while, anyway.

  22. Mike Jowsey says:

    Ric Werme says:
    March 29, 2012 at 11:03 am

    Laugh my asp off!! Brilliant

  23. mkelly says:

    No wonder he hit home runs he was too (fill in the blank) to read the signs from 3rd base for bunt, take a pitch etc.

  24. kadaka (KD Knoebel) says:

    If Al Gore had died and was replaced with animatronics so his image would still be useful to “the cause”, could you tell?

    Well his wife would notice and complain, citing “…’til death do us part” as her escape clause, and want to distance herself from the deception somehow… Oh wait, that happened.

    Dear Lord, I hope the controlling computer has strong protections to prevent inadvertently activating the “chakra release” function. Better include a hardwired safety curtain to make sure everyone is at least the minimum safe distance away.

  25. Kelvin Vaughan says:

    Flannel pyjamas? With all this global warming I don’t wear pyjamas any more, an extra 0.8°C and the heat is killing me.

  26. Kev-in-UK says:

    Twitter is; as has already been mentioned; for twits. IMHO it’s basically a waste of cyberspace – a tiny snippet media outlet for folk who cannot string more than a few words together! The need to impart one’s every daily thought to others is rather sad – but even worse is those who need to ‘follow’ the thoughts of others – sheep/lemmings instantly spring to mind!!
    Some time ago, I proposed a different name – replacing the ‘i’ in Twitter, and Twits – with an ‘a’. I find this most appropriate…..

  27. Ron McDonald says:

    Nice to see Al baby reduces his carbon footprint in the future – that Al-in-a-can machine is solar powered, right?

  28. John W. Garrett says:

    Want some more dumb?

    Here’s an NPR blog by a physicist, Dr. Adam Frank, in which he maintains that the climate changes: http://www.npr.org/blogs/13.7/2012/03/29/149411018/climate-controversy-and-strangers-on-a-plane

    My stars! Can you believe that?

  29. Pull My Finger says:

    Especially damaging was the one that bounced off his head and over the fence for a home run.
    http://www.yourdailymedia.com/video/watch/5082/

    Another ‘climate expert’. I never knew he took so many balls to the head.

  30. Eric said @ March 29, 2012 at 10:32 am

    Steroids are bad……m’kay

    (h/t Mr Mackey)

    A little over two years ago, the arthritic pain in my ankle became unbearable; I could barely walk. An injection of steroids directly into the joint provided almost immediate pain relief. Twenty four hours later, I no longer needed my cane. Within a week, the pain in my lower back had diminished to the point where I no longer needed opiate analgesia. Performance-enhancing drugs are good… m’kay?

    I do so wish that some sort of performance-enhancing drugs could be given to our politicians…

  31. Ian W says:

    Latitude says:
    March 29, 2012 at 10:31 am
    Who was it that said she liked her men big and dumb?………………..

    I believe another quote about one of her paramours was: “The lift stops at the neck.”

  32. LamontT says:

    If he wants me to freeze in my house without heating I’ll take a polar bear skin robe to wrap myself in. That should keep me nice and toasty.

  33. Stark Dickflüssig says:

    Hmm, has a ball bounce off his head (for a home-run) while playing center field, gets the living daylights whalloped out of him doing some silly punch-kicker thing, and now shills for the CAGW industry.

    I am shocked.

  34. u.k.(us) says:

    No fair, Anthony.
    Thinking targets are a greater challenge :)

  35. Mickey Reno says:

    Jose Canseco tweeted: “Al Gore is a head of his time.”

    I guess Jose watches Futurama, too!

  36. Brian H says:

    Everyone’s got one. Celebrities’ are bigger.

  37. Rick says:

    I wonlder how many polar bears per mile the Caddy consumes ;-)

  38. johneb says:

    “hole families…” I don’t get it. Does he mean clusters of holes? If he really wants to go all-in deprivation, he should look to rural N Korea for a societal model. They have no power consumption and are so close to the earth they eat dirt. In addition, they have become significantly smaller as a result of their lifestyle. They don’t need as much dirt as they did in the past.

  39. Jarrett Jones says:

    I guess he decided to go “green” after the bank took away his 7300 square foot house.

    http://celebgossip.buzznet.com/user/photos/bank-strikes-out-jose-cansecos/?id=35288581

    .. but then again maybe he was already buying indulgences from Pope Al (RIP).

  40. Steve from Rockwood says:

    I’ve always found Jose to be a reasonable, sober guy…
    And in a very clever way, he’s right. Al Gore is dead, when it comes to AGW.

  41. Matthew W says:

    John W. Garrett says:
    March 29, 2012 at 11:55 am
    Want some more dumb?
    ===========================================
    I should slap you for making me go there and read that garbage !!
    Some extremely malinformed commenters there !!

  42. jonjermey says:

    This is why baseball players don’t get Nobel Prizes.

  43. Gail Combs says:

    The Pompous Git says:
    March 29, 2012 at 12:07 pm
    A little over two years ago, the arthritic pain in my ankle became unbearable;….Performance-enhancing drugs are good… m’kay?

    I do so wish that some sort of performance-enhancing drugs could be given to our politicians…
    _________________________
    A good long look at Madame Guillotine before they take the Oath of Office?

  44. Gail Combs says:

    Seems the Jose is FOR SALE

  45. Gary Pate says:

    So why does this moron think Gore is dead? Not that I would shed a tear if he was….

  46. Shevva says:

    Propaganda works in funny ways.

    No more polar bears to recycle clowns, no more recycling polar bear clowns, no more clowns with cycling bears. (h/T Jose Canseco).

  47. walterdnes says:

    Now all we need is for Dr. Gleick to find a document showing Heartland Institute funding Jose Canseco. That one I could almost believe.

  48. John in L du B says:

    Hah! That’s great! Turn off your heat compeletly at night in January in these parts and you’ll wake up to a flooded basement. Where does this guy live? Must be a California climate nut. Try around here in winter and you’ll get some climate.

  49. More Soylent Green! says:

    Jose, of course, purchases carbon offsets for the baseball bats he uses and only travels by Chevrolet Volt.

    ~More Soylent Green!

  50. Shevva says:

    Bishop Hill’s comments have broken out in an impromptu poetry competition if anyone is interested.

    http://bishophill.squarespace.com/blog/2012/3/29/hulmes-new-climate-course.html

    It’s called eco-poetry.

  51. Eric says:

    The Pompous Git says:
    March 29, 2012 at 12:07 pm

    Pompous, Jose injected steroids and “other” performance enhancing drugs for years…I doubt you are doing the same…

    BTW it was a joke, hence the h/t Mr Mackey… Google: South Park Mr Mackey and have a laugh. ;)

  52. Kev-in-UK says:

    u.k.(us) says:
    March 29, 2012 at 12:29 pm

    Hmm – that’s so true! especially after Ms Sherri or whatever her name was!
    I suppose it doesn’t help that there aren’t many CAGW protagonists with the capacity for real thought? Otherwise, why would they be such vehement activists? LOL

  53. John M says:

    Maybe he ought to see if Sheryl Crow is available.

  54. kadaka (KD Knoebel) says:

    It’s always great to see celebrities conserving energy that’s normally wasted by active brain cells.

  55. Tad says:

    Maybe steroids make one especially sensitive to warm temperatures…

  56. Jenn Oates says:

    Besides the climate idiocy, he’s borderline illiterate.

    Ouch.

  57. Taphonomic says:

    I never realized that steroids could turn your brain to swiss cheese.

  58. dtbronzich says:

    I believe that my IQ fell a dozen points reading the tweets……

  59. RockyRoad says:

    REPLY: From the masthead: current news/puzzling things. Humor helps take the edge off some of the hate mail sent my way every day. – Anthony

    Hate mail is simply an indication you’re headed in the right direction. The amount of hate mail indicates you’re facing strong winds of adversity. And it’s the strong wind on an airplane that keeps it aloft. Congratulations.

  60. kadaka (KD Knoebel) says:

    John M said on March 29, 2012 at 2:48 pm:

    Maybe he ought to see if Sheryl Crow is available.

    Remember, if you go to one of her houses it’s BYOTP.

    Hopefully you can find a bathroom with a locking door so you can flush in private, otherwise she’ll be looking in the bowl to verify you only used the one sheet she begrudgingly gave you. After all, humans are depraved and unnatural, as she is well aware. Have you ever seen any natural creature kill a tree when disposing its dooty?

  61. RockyRoad says:

    The Pompous Git says:
    March 29, 2012 at 12:07 pm

    I do so wish that some sort of performance-enhancing drugs could be given to our politicians…

    Truth serum comes to mind–I’m sure voters would even contribute to cover the cost. But for your arthritis pain, consider massive applications of tea tree oil–I’ve used it for effective relief of the little buggers that cause the inflamation. Just get the highest quality you can find and don’t worry if you smell somewhat obnoxious to those around you.

  62. Byron says:

    jonjermey says:
    March 29, 2012 at 1:20 pm
    This is why baseball players don’t get Nobel Prizes.

    Not yet , but In this age of post-normal science , it`s only a matter of time ….

  63. LC Kirk, Perth says:

    Would anybody like to guess what level of the population shares that level of literacy and rationality? It explains a great deal about the individuals that they vote for, the ideas they espouse and the choices that they make in the course of their daily lives..

  64. R. Shearer says:

    Jose, “Baseball been very very good to me.”
    Al, “Global warming been very very good to me.”
    Jose, “Al Gore taught me to stretch truth like single into double. We all know Al sick. Me say he dead.”

  65. GeoLurking says:

    kadaka (KD Knoebel) says:
    March 29, 2012 at 4:42 pm

    “… Have you ever seen any natural creature kill a tree when disposing its dooty?”

    Seen the dog scatter it in dirt and leaves and then drag it’s arse across the yard.

    That count?

  66. Lulu says:

    A Hagerstown Suns fan has informed me that apparently there IS frying in baseball:
    http://mlblogsbensbiz.files.wordpress.com/2011/09/hag_20tentmenu.jpg?w=555&h=416

  67. David Falkner says:

    Global warming on steroids.

  68. Dave Worley says:

    “I do so wish that some sort of performance-enhancing drugs could be given to our politicians… ”

    Sleeping pills would work.

  69. Brian H says:
    March 29, 2012 at 12:33 pm

    Everyone’s got one. Celebrities’ are bigger.

    Stacey Brown got two!

  70. RockyRoad said @ March 29, 2012 at 4:45 pm

    The Pompous Git says:
    March 29, 2012 at 12:07 pm

    I do so wish that some sort of performance-enhancing drugs could be given to our politicians…

    Truth serum comes to mind–I’m sure voters would even contribute to cover the cost. But for your arthritis pain, consider massive applications of tea tree oil–I’ve used it for effective relief of the little buggers that cause the inflamation. Just get the highest quality you can find and don’t worry if you smell somewhat obnoxious to those around you.

    Tea tree oil’s great for subacute pain; not so great when it becomes severe. It’s wonderful in the long hot baths Gits are so very fond of :-)

    Being ever so fond of garlic, there are many who find the Git obnoxious :-)

  71. Eric said @ March 29, 2012 at 2:29 pm

    The Pompous Git says:
    March 29, 2012 at 12:07 pm

    Pompous, Jose injected steroids and “other” performance enhancing drugs for years…I doubt you are doing the same…

    BTW it was a joke, hence the h/t Mr Mackey… Google: South Park Mr Mackey and have a laugh. ;)

    Yup! Got the joke. When he was still in primary school, the Gitling used to tape South Park (and Red Dwarf) as Gits go very early to bed. We used to watch the shows the following day.

  72. Grant says:

    That’s it, I’m following Jose. Good stuff!

  73. Chuck Nolan says:

    LamontT says:
    March 29, 2012 at 12:10 pm
    If he wants me to freeze in my house without heating I’ll take a polar bear skin robe to wrap myself in. That should keep me nice and toasty.
    —————————–
    I can’t believe that’s what they want from the lower masses. Why would they want to make us live just like our great grand parents.
    Kill a bear, skin a deer, trap a beaver, club a seal….just like our great grand parents.
    Now, the question is….what the hell do they really want from we citizens? I don’t think they’re being honest with us concerning their motives and goals.
    I like my standard of living and would want everybody to live as well as they can.
    Unlike the folks at UN and the IPCC I think getting energy to the third world is the right idea.

  74. J.H. says:

    It would appear that there’s no spelling in Baseball either…..;-)

  75. Andrew says:

    I take back everything I said about intelligent life being an emergent property of a complex physical universe. You only need to falsify an hypotheis once right?

  76. Shevva says:

    Hollywood has nothing on real life, if anyones intrested a new printing service allows you to print out your favorite celebs twits.

    http://www.dailymail.co.uk/sciencetech/article-2122318/Think-Twitters-New-site-prints-Twitter-page-favourite-celebritys-rolls-loo-paper.html

  77. horiwood says:

    lol – “people send me stuff” – loved that as your opener. Too true!

  78. AllanJ says:

    For some odd reason I am reminded of one of the greatest ad libs of all time. David Niven was hosting the Academy Awards when a male streaker ran across the stage. Mr Niven said something like, “What a shame that the most memorable day in that man’s life will be when he took off his clothes and revealed his shortcomings.”

  79. Caleb says:

    “hole families….”

    He spelled it that way because it refers to the cellar hole. That is all that is left of some old farms in New England.

    People died at fifty back then. How old is this fellow, now?

  80. markx says:

    Bloody typical: has got his 500 hp caddie, is flying off to celebrity golf tournaments, and thinks he gets some brownie points (from who?) by strategic use of the phrases “global warming”, “polar bears”, and “recycling”.

    Amusing how the majority seem to accept that these plus “sustainable” and “carbon footprint” are now a compulsory part of every conversation.

    We really are amazingly programmable monkeys.

  81. Urban Daddy says:

    That was great! Thanks for posting it and bringing to my attention that I need to follow 1-800 PHONE-JOSE on twitter. Just can’t make this stuff up!

    I miss him in baseball. It was great when he was a Blue Jay all roided up and snashing baseballs into the 5th deck of the SkyDome (now Rogers Centre). He was worth the price of admission.

  82. daved46 says:

    Actually this thread makes me want to click above and read the Gore-a-thon comics.

  83. _Jim says:

    Too funny; ’tis true, things like this could not be ‘made up’ … love the follow on comments by posters too!

  84. RobRoy says:

    …From a juiced-up cheater. Limo liberal advice on ten-to-a-bed sleeping with no heat. I’ll bet his flannel PJs are designer. What a TOOL!

  85. ashazenzi says:

    he needs to hire a personal tweeter. quickly.

  86. Louis Hooffstetter says:

    He certainly makes the case for natural selection (or eugenics).

    Lord forgive me for thinking that.

  87. Caleb says:

    Those turned off by religion said, “God is dead,” back in the 1960′s.

    “Gore is dead” makes a strange sense, seen in that light.

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