Weapons Grade Goofiness: North Korea’s Kim Jong Un can control the weather

From the and “here all along it was supposed to be CO2, but instead its imperious leader Kim Jong Un” department comes this hilarious news story. According to North Korea’s state run media, Kim Jong Un controlled the weather when he scaled a sacred mountain known as Mount Paektu. I suppose we’ll have to swap out the carbon dioxide control knob that climate scientists, Al Gore and Jerry Brown are claiming controls the weather (most recently wildfires in SoCal according to Brown) and replace it with another (equal, but more emotive) control knob: Kim Jong Un. It used to be “CO2 is there anything it can’t do?”. Now we’ll have to revise that to say “Kim Jong Un, is there anything he can’t do?”.

PYONGYANG, North Korea – Making a bizarre claim, the North Korean media claimed that the country’s leader, Kim Jong Un can control the weather.

According to North Korea’s state media, Kim Jong Un controlled the weather when he scaled a sacred mountain. The dictator is said to have dressed in smart leather shoes and climbed the 2,744m high Mount Paektu.

Pyongyang media stated that the mountain has a special place in Korean folklore and has been used by the Kim family for generations in propaganda. The state media claimed that it was snowing because the mountain wanted to give a “warm welcome” to Kim Jong Un.

According to the report, Mount Paektu wanted to “show joy at the appearance of the peerlessly illustrious commander who controls the nature.”

more: http://www.denmarknews.net/news/255691883/north-korean-media-claims-kim-jong-un-can-control-weather

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87 thoughts on “Weapons Grade Goofiness: North Korea’s Kim Jong Un can control the weather

    • Essentially, he’s set himself up as a god-king to the people.
      Same basic principle as the Pharaohs, Caesars, and Chinese Emperors.
      Whether people actually believe in it is unimportant so long as they submit

      • And, for some, this side of the Ditch, Supreme Leader Corbyn.
        They – may not remembering the Wilson-Callaghan administration that left the dead unburied, or even the Blair-Brown one that admitted ‘There is no money left’ [or some synonym] – seem to believe that Corbyn has magic money trees, that the uber-rich will happily stay and give him huge chunks of their spondulix, and that he can suspend the rules of economics (vide Venezuela) and control the tides [if not, yet, the weather]!

        Auto

    • No, they don`t believe it. They must believe. That’s a huge difference. Otherwise they will be thrown to his dogs for dessert.

      • “They must believe.”

        I bet being a climate modeller in NK is a precarious, and possibly life threatening, job!

  1. Has he ever been under fire in Bosnia, had his emails stolen or his election hacked by the Russians, invented the internet or claimed the earth is on the brink of climate catastrophe ?

    Those require a special, more powerful, American level of dumb.

  2. “…peerlessly illustrious commander who controls the nature…”

    I move we change Jerry Brown’s title from Governor of Calizuela to “Peerlessly Illustrious Commander Who Controls the Nature.”

  3. Ridiculous. Everyone knows that only the UN can control the weather. Not weather exactly but, even more omnipotently, the planet’s climate.

    The CAGW gang also believes that Trump controls the ‘weather’ because, by pulling out of Paris and hampering their New Save The World Order plan, he is said to be ruining the climate.

    So, really, what’s the difference between those North Koreans who actually believe this and those who fall for the CO2 fairy tale?

    Not much. And, in both cases, for the people at the top it has nothing to do with weather or climate but is all about power.

    I think the funniest part of this story is the claim that he “scaled” this mountain, though I suppose that word could describe his walk from the helicopter.

    • Kim may have not this through. Strike that… of course he hasn’t thought this through. If he can control the weather then surely he controls the crop yields and has intentionally caused millions of his citizens to starve. Not the best way to curry favor with the masses but then it did work for Mao for a while.

  4. Maybe Governor Brown should hold a Climate summit with Kim Jung-un. Jerry can learn how to control the weather and the wild fires, and do something about the “new normal” in California.

  5. If he can control the weather, why can’t he control his own weight? In each successive photograph I see of him he appears fatter than the previous one – all the while so many of the people are undernourished or starving. A comical looking megalomaniac. Someone should strap him to one of his rockets.

    • 3 cents worth: he looks fatter each time you see him because among other things, he is preparing his own succession. That’s right, he’s pregnant! Look, if a guy can climb a snowy mountain in a pair of leather kicks, and control the weather at the same time, he can father (and mother) his own child.

  6. And we had The Chisen One who could roll back the rising seas…

    Jun 3, 2008 · “this was the moment when the rise of the oceans began to slow and our planet began to heal …”
    – Barack H. Obama, nomination victory speech

    so who is nuttier?

    • Good question.
      I would imagine Obama’s ruinous climate policies have done far more harm to America than the fat guy – at least so far.
      But we shouldn’t be too hard on Obama: it looks like he may have achieved his promise on the oceans, at least just before Trump kicked him out of the White House:
      https://climate.nasa.gov/vital-signs/sea-level/
      According to the data sea levels have been flat or falling for several years.

      If I were a cynic – which thank goodness I’m not – I might think NASA have failed to update the graph since July because they’re trying to hide the decline.

      The other graph tells a powerful story. I can’t understand how anyone can look at that tide gauge graph and still claim that sea level rise is a serious threat.
      Chris

  7. And we had The Chisen One who could roll back the rising seas…

    Jun 3, 2008 · “this was the moment when the rise of the oceans began to slow and our planet began to heal …”
    – Barack H. Obama, nomination victory speech

    so who is nuttier?

    • That is the question. However, Barack Obama had no dogs to which he could leave the non-believers for dessert. That’s another difference. But in principle you’re right, it’s the same hubris.

      • I thought there was a poodle – not the Algoreoithm cove, but a water-poodle – possibly Iberian, if memory serves [which it may not], although that may be a dog for the daughters . . . . .

        Auto
        No great friend of the last POTUS – but fair’s fair for the doggie!

        • If I remember correctly, the Obamas had a Portuguese Water Dog, which sort of looks like a clipped poodle.

  8. Sad to say there are people that not only would believe this, but they also believe our own government does.

  9. The Pillsbury dough boy has a soul mate in California’s Moonbeam . If Moonbeam thinks the current mann made fires are due to climate change just wait till those nukes hit California first . Moonbeam needs to stop all that particulate pollution California is pumping out . Moonbeam getting all godly is rich .

  10. I assume this is either an accidental or deliberate mis-translation or metaphoric subtlety too difficult for a corporate journalist. In the cold war, Russians said that the biggest difference between themselves and Americans is that they didn’t believe their government’s propaganda, Americans did.

    • You mean “poor sods”, don’t you. It would take more than one at a time to carry that fellow up the mountain.

      You look at videos of the fattest man in North Korea surrounded by his generals and the poor ole generals look like scarecrows in comparison to Kim Jung-un, and they have to be the best-fed people in the country other than Kim, although the guys in the picture look a little healthier.

      It’s really a huge scandal that the last three American presidents have allowed this insane North Korean regime to get so dangerous. They wanted to kick the can down the road and now we have run out of road.

      When Trump nukes the hell out of Kim, the Western elites will blame Trump rather than Kim Jung-un and previous feckless American presidents, and Russia and China.

    • With profound apologies to Queen.

      He’s for every one of us
      Stand for every one of us
      He save with a mighty hand
      Every man, every woman
      Every child…

  11. 1)Seems to me a pretty standard thinking: when you are a very good person, the sky acknowledge by sending you appropriate weather, and, the other way round, when you are bad leader you have bad weather (and your people have, too: that’s your fault). So a properly managed propaganda will boast of the good weather. Or it would just as well praise the Leader for vanquishing the bad weather, if it happened
    2) unless the man is a fool, he would consult weathermen on the best time to do the trip, so, in a way, he indeed control weather, the same way the king of “the little prince” can order a sunrise …only at the proper hour!

  12. The Dumpling has about six months left. Once RoK schools let out for the summer vacation, so that northern Seoul metro area can be evacuated, the fat phouque is toast. Or ionized atoms.

    https://www.google.com/url?sa=i&rct=j&q=&esrc=s&source=images&cd=&cad=rja&uact=8&ved=0ahUKEwju0tKel4LYAhUCIZAKHQDjCJkQjRwIBw&url=https%3A%2F%2Fgardanasional.id%2Fpost%2F3482%2Fmeski-sebelumnya-nggak-ngaruh-as-kembali-takuti-korea-utara-dengan-pembom-b-1b&psig=AOvVaw24dWnRB_cqGZJhJVFFlK5T&ust=1513089322940211

    Unless the mass and serial murdering rapist tyrant wises up, which is unlikely.

    • Putin: North Koreans Would Rather Eat Grass Than Give Up Nukes, If They Don’t Feel Safe

      Why is that ?

      Newsweek

      In a 1984 interview, Air Force Gen. Curtis LeMay, head of the Strategic Air Command during the Korean War, claimed U.S. bombs “killed off 20 percent of the population” and “targeted everything that moved in North Korea.” These acts, largely ignored by the U.S.’ collective memory, have deeply contributed to Pyongyang’s contempt for the U.S. and especially its ongoing military presence on the Korean Peninsula.

      • GEN LeMay was wrong. Total military and civilian Korean deaths in the Korean War, started by the North, were around 2.2 million out of over 30 million in 1950.

        The Kim crime family killed about 15% of its subject enslaved population in the famine of the 1990s alone. Add to that those publicly executed for listening to RoK soap operas and similar crimes, those worked to death in forced labor camps and killed or died trying to escape, and you’ll see who the real war criminals are in this picture.

        • He started the nuke programme b/c American genocidal savages destroyed his country in the 1950s !!

          I am going to believe the Russian/North Korean version of events over fake news American media every single time. Americans should watch Putin. He makes Obama look like a simpering twit. I don’t support him. He’s done very bad things (Chechnya) but he’s preferable to any American politician.

          “Putin Tells It Like It Is: US Presidents Are Puppets, ‘Men in Dark Suits’ Rule Washington”

      • Putin’s attributing the Nork nuke program to the US liberation of Iraq is idiotic. Kim Il Sung began the program in the ’60s. Kim Jung Il just continued it in the 1990s, as now has his fat spawn, parasitic on Korea and the world.

      • Eric Coo
        December 11, 2017 at 9:28 am

        Putin is a mass murdering thief who has invaded other countries besides his oppression of Chechnya, before making peace with the Islamist regime there. He has supported fellow mass murderers in Georgia, Ukraine, Crimea and Syria. He and Assad bolstered ISIS in order to weaken resistance to the genocidal Alawite regime in Syria, to include allowing thousands of Chechen jihadis to travel to Syria.

        America, OTOH, has liberated countries from genocidal maniacs like Saddam.

        • If the Nuremberg laws were applied, then every post-war American president would have been hanged.

          Noam Chomsky

          In the 1980s Americans were universally regarded as the dumbest, most gullible people on earth because no one told them anything. For example, they thought Jimmy Carter was a cuddly little peanut farmer.

          This is a VERY long list of unspeakable horror.

          “Jimmy Carter’s Blood-Drenched Legacy

          Zaire, 1977

          Guatemala, 1977

          East Timor, 1977

          Angola, 1978

          Afghanistan, 1979

          El Salvador, 1980

          http://www.counterpunch.org/2015/08/18/jimmy-carters-blood-drenched-legacy/

      • Eric Coo
        December 11, 2017 at 9:47 am

        Noam Chomsky?!

        YHGTBSM!

        You have truly drunk the Koolaid. The places you mention were instances of Soviet and surrogate (eg Cuba) aggression.

        Please go back to school and learn some actual history.

      • The slave state of North Korea exists today only because of the despotic, mass murdering dictators Stalin and Mao. The Kim dynasty has horribly continued their tyrannical traditions. Its days are numbered. Soon the North will be free, peaceful and prosperous, like the South, thanks to America and free enterprise.

      • Eric,

        The surest and quickest cure for your delusions would be to go and live in the Kims’ hell on earth for a year. Or exist, if you could.

        I’m sure that it would take less time than that. Then compare and contrast with the RoK, protected and promoted by America.

      • If US and UN wouldn’t have intervened in Korea, democratic and prosperous South Korea would never have existed, and Communists, who have done nothing but enslaved, murdered, and starved millions of its own people, would rule the whole country now, and be even more powerful and dangerous than currently. North Koreans should blame their own leaders, not US.

  13. I hear the Jong family are also expert golfers. Kim’s father (Kim Jong-il) was reportedly able to hit 18 Hole In One’s all in his very first golf game. I am in such awe of this Marxist/Fascist leader. His country is so advanced and prosperous, and technologically superior with nuclear power. I think some of our western leaders are trying so hard to emulate him, in the way he governs so wisely.

  14. Ah communism, the only thing it is good for is dealing with obesity in the population, not in the leadership though.

    If the US and EU had communism month twice a year obesity would be a thing of the past before long 😀 Mind you the EU is not far short of communism month 😉 Anyone ever read the UN manifesto too? Dripping red 😀

    • The Kim regime helps combat weight gain with the help of giant internal parasites. Which is a sad irony, since the Kim crime family are themselves giant, often lethal parasites.

  15. The state media claimed that it was snowing because the mountain wanted to give a “warm welcome” to Kim Jong Un.

    Snow is a “warm welcome”?
    Maybe he is a “Climate Scientist”!

  16. See? This is clearly a proof that communism is the solution to climate change. Just ask this guy to teach his secrets to everyone!

    • Kim Jong Un has nothing to do with communism. As much as I view communism as a non-human ideology, Kim-Jong-Un and his ancestors have nothing to do with communism. This family dynasty is the continuation of millennia-old Korean tyrants. One less, the other more, but all by force. Also, democracy in South Korea is only thin whitewash, which still needs a lot of time to really usher in a new era. It’s not so easy to end cultures and mentalities with a stroke of the pen.

      • I wonder if you’ve ever actually been to Korea.

        Without communist dictators Mao and Stalin, there would be no North Korea.

        South Korea is as democratic now as any country on the planet. Its past regimes have been no more absolutist than those of Europe.

      • Kim Jong Un’s regime is perfect communism. Previous tyrants were unable to have a completely totalitarian regime, which is essentially what communism strives for.

  17. They are careful in not showing the front of their “high tech” computer. Guess they don’t want us stealing their technology!

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