While Matt Ridley makes mincemeat of über alarmist Joe Romm’s latest ridiculous claims, I started doing a search for stories to do a “year in review” for such things. I just found this, though it is six years old. It came out before I started WUWT, so that’s why I missed it.
It’s weapons-grade stupid, and fanatically FUBAR. It’s also hysterically funny.
From the Eco-Enquirer (h/t to Skeptical Scientist on FB):
University of Michigan scientists have claimed that global warming causes an increased risk of asteroids striking the Earth, due to expansion of the atmosphere outward into space making the Earth a bigger “target”.
“Some large meteoroids have skimmed the outer reaches of Earth’s atmosphere, skipping off back into outer space”, said Professor Charles Boyle, chairman of U. of M.’s Near-Earth Asteroid Team (NEAT). “As the atmosphere warms, it expands outward, potentially capturing large asteroids that would have otherwise been a near-miss. It seems that the dangers from global warming just keep mounting up…like the national debt.”
The source story: http://www.ecoenquirer.com/global-warming-asteroid.htm
Obviously, it is a spoof story, because they’ve changed NEAT from what it actually is. http://neo.jpl.nasa.gov/programs/neat.html There’s no Charles Boyle on the NEAT program (a spoof name of the Boyles and Charles gas laws). And, the Eco-Enquirer has this disclaimer.
Besides being a ridiculous story on face value (though with just enough science to be a plausible claim), there’s only one teeny tiny little problem with the claim.
From WUWT on August 26th, 2010:
Results of a study published today link a recent, temporary shrinking of a high atmospheric layer with a sharp drop in the sun’s ultraviolet radiation levels.
The research, led by scientists at the National Center for Atmospheric Research (NCAR) in Boulder, Colo., and the University of Colorado at Boulder (CU), indicates that the sun’s magnetic cycle, which produces differing numbers of sunspots over an approximately 11-year cycle, may vary more than previously thought.
That, and there’s no tropospheric hot spot (which would also expand the atmosphere) as expected from warming, from:
http://joannenova.com.au/2012/05/models-get-the-core-assumptions-wrong-the-hot-spot-is-missing/
It is not well known that even the IPCC agrees that the direct effects of CO2 will only increase world temperatures by 1.2°C. All of the projections above that (3.3°C , 6°C etc) come from model projections based on assumptions of what water vapor and clouds will do (these are the feedback effects of the original 1.2°C).[i] Are the feedbacks correct?
If the IPCC models are right about the feedbacks, we would see a hot spot 10km above the tropics. The theory is that with more heat, more water will evaporate and rise, keeping relative humidity constant at all heights in the troposphere. The point has been conclusively tested with 28 million weather balloons since 1959.[ii]
As for the ridiculous claim about CO2 and asteroid strikes, I thought surely there’s no parallel to this, no peer, no possible equal in the realm of silly-stupid claims about global warming (spoof or not).
Then, I saw this paper which is oh-too-real:
No second chance? Can Earth explode as a result of Global Warming?
Dr Tom J. Chalko 1 , MSc, PhD
Submitted on 8 April 2001, revised 30 October 2004. Published in NU Journal of Discovery ISSN 1444 1454 Publisher: Natural University
Abstract: The heat generated inside our planet is predominantly of radionic (nuclear) origin. Hence, Earth in its entirety can be considered a slow nuclear reactor with its solid ”inner core” providing a major contribution to the total energy output. Since radionic heat is generated in the entire volume and cooling can only occur at the surface, the highest temperature inside Earth occurs at the center of the inner core. Overheating the center of the inner core reactor due to the so-called greenhouse effect on the surface of Earth may cause a meltdown condition, an enrichment of nuclear fuel and a gigantic atomic explosion.Paper here: http://nujournal.net/core.pdf
God help us all, the stupid, it burns.

Could we have an interview of Prof. Boyle of NEAT at the U of M?
Kurt in Switzerland
Oh my various gods…
Doomed.
I knew it.
are we dead yet?
Paper #2 is “much better” !
And this drivel passes “peer review”?
How & why do perpetrators of such ridiculous concepts continue to receive a salary, let alone research funding?
Kurt in Switzerland
The presence of extra CO2 in the upper atmosphere causes increased cooling by increasing the IR outward radiation. This causes the atmospheric bubble surrounding the earth to shrink, reducing its radius and making it a smaller target. Further, if the outer atmosphere is denser being cooler, would it not also make it more likely that glancing meteorites would be bounced away?
Is intelligence necessary for survival in tertiary education? The answer is in and I am deeply depressed.
I don’t know….. it is very stupid, but, is it really the stupidest? I’ve lost track of the stupidest, but the warmista have an endless stream of stupid, so we may have to dig up some more and have a poll.
since it was six years ago, I think a “where are they now” segment on charles boyle would be epic.
Edward Bancroft says:
December 22, 2012 at 11:16 am
Only hollow ones about the size of an Apollo command module 🙂
A bigger target? I guess they don’t know how big the universe really is, so perhaps someone can forward this explanation to the good folks at Eco-Enquirer…
http://youtu.be/eJ2tt5d4h_A
Uh, I think this is a spoof. There was an companion article about the 2027 Bali Climate talks with Grand Wizard (or somesuch) Al Gore.
http://www.ecoenquirer.com/Bali-global-warming-2027.htm
Whomever is writing these is brilliant….and has a good grasp of the circus mentality surrounding the climate change ‘debate’. Surprised nobody noticed!
Some comments after CBS ran a story on Chalko’s work:
http://www.cbsnews.com/8601-205_162-4191556-7.html?assetTypeId=30&blogId=
It has now become apparent, SETI is way overfunded as there is no Intelligent life Anywhere in the Universe
More, bigger target?
oh, I love the one about over tempting the nuclear core and blowing up the earth. That is prime time material.
From the “Natural University” website: “NU is a University whose Purpose precisely coincides with The Purpose of the entire Universe – maximizing the satisfaction from conscious existence…Knowing is a bliss. Can you imagine the bliss of knowing more?”
It’s a woo-woo science site.
Big tongue in cheek from the Eco Enuirer, I believe!
Now that all reputable scientists agree that global warming is the greatest threat to face mankind since the secretly-thwarted alien invasion of 1955, it seemed that just the warming alone was enough to strike terror in the hearts of Earth’s imperiled inhabitants.
I think it’s this Dr. Tom J. Chalko. Masters in Engineering & PhD in Laser holography.
DaveE.
[snip. Invalid email address. — mod.]
Bryan A says:
December 22, 2012 at 11:31 am
It has now become apparent, SETI is way overfunded as there is no Intelligent life Anywhere in the Universe
Actually, there is. The fact they HAVEN’T contacted us, is proof of their intelligence!
ChrisB,
Thanks, Eric Idle is always good.
Instead of being alarmed, we should…
Other Eco-Enquirer stories are also hilarious. I especially like the one about polar bears collapsing from heat exhaustion.
David A. Evans says:
December 22, 2012 at 11:46 am
Don’t knock it! Isn’t anything that may cut the cost of Barry’s Big Idea worth a look? Medical doctors will love it, as Dr Chalko’s work is the ultimate in the Medical profession’s favourite excuse, “It’s the patient’s fault.”
I thought this guy must be some kind of agent provocateur. Sadly, it appears he thinks he’s real. From NU’s website:
“NU is a University in which there are no professors, only Autonomous Individual Intellects that respect each other’s Freedom of Choice.”
That’s it for peer review then.