Almost every day, the ridiculo-meter pegs over at Joe Romm’s place. But today is special. He neuters his own headline in the very first paragraph. I just had to share the laughs.
Yes, the vampire bats are coming to get us thanks to climate change, or maybe not.
…
“Biologists are paying attention to the warming climate and what potential impacts that could bring, including non-native wildlife, but this is not something that will likely happen within the next few years,” Peterson said.
Oh thank heavens. It would be a tragedy if the climate change caused vampire bats to team up with the killer bees in Texas.
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From National Geographic:
“In one year, a 100-bat colony can drink the blood of 25 cows.
During the darkest part of the night, common vampire bats emerge to hunt. Sleeping cattle and horses are their usual victims, but they have been known to feed on people as well. The bats drink their victim’s blood for about 30 minutes. They don’t remove enough blood to harm their host, but their bites can cause nasty infections and disease.”
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I love the reference to the cows! One bat can drink a quarter of a cow’s blood in a year, assuming the cow is tethered in the Batcave. The bat would be kept pretty busy forking hay and cleaning up manure, though.
Also, the notion of TSA employees frisking the bats before they cross the border is very alluring indeed.
Just goes to show that Friday funnies can happen any day of the week!
I have been trying hard to remember anythig bad or scary that has not or will not be caused by global warming. Only one thing I can think of and that’s Obamacare (sarc).
It sucks more than we thought!
“Oh thank heavens. It would be a tragedy if the climate change caused vampire bats to team up with the killer bees in Texas.”
Not to worry. We’ll sic the fire ants on ’em.
battiness aside:
Princeton physicist William Happer in WSJ:
26 March: WSJ: William Happer: Global Warming Models Are Wrong Again
The observed response of the climate to more CO2 is not in good agreement with predictions.
What is happening to global temperatures in reality? The answer is: almost nothing for more than 10 years. Monthly values of the global temperature anomaly of the lower atmosphere, complied at the University of Alabama from NASA satellite data, can be found at the website http://www.drroyspencer.com/latest-global-temperatures/. The latest (February 2012) monthly global temperature anomaly for the lower atmosphere was minus 0.12 degrees Celsius, slightly less than the average since the satellite record of temperatures began in 1979.
The lack of any statistically significant warming for over a decade has made it more difficult for the United Nations Intergovernmental Panel on Climate Change (IPCC) and its supporters to demonize the atmospheric gas CO2 which is released when fossil fuels are burned…
Frustrated by the lack of computer-predicted warming over the past decade, some IPCC supporters have been claiming that “extreme weather” has become more common because of more CO2. But there is no hard evidence this is true…
Nightly television pictures of the tragic destruction from tornadoes over the past months might make one wonder if the frequency of tornadoes is increasing, perhaps due to the increasing levels of CO2 in the atmosphere. But as one can read at Andrew Revkin’s New York Times blog, dotearth, “There is no evidence of any trend in the number of potent tornadoes (category F2 and up) over the past 50 years in the United States, even as global temperatures have risen markedly.” …
http://online.wsj.com/article/SB10001424052702304636404577291352882984274.html?mod=googlenews_wsj
Romm is the best thing going for realists. I am part way convinced that he’s a stealth skeptic who has bored his way into the heart of the beast in order that all & sundry can see the lunacy that drives this phenomenon.
Barking moonbats, yes. They’ve already spread worldwide and cost humanity billions of dollars annually. Unfortunately there is no known way to eradicate the infestation.
Vampire bats? Not so much of a problem.
Mike McMillan says:
March 26, 2012 at 10:34 pm
“Oh thank heavens. It would be a tragedy if the climate change caused vampire bats to team up with the killer bees in Texas.”
Not to worry. We’ll sic the fire ants on ‘em.
______________________________
I have a few nests I can donate. Should I send them to Joe Romm?
I know! I can send some fruit bats over from Australia. They can team up with the vampire bats and their offspring can GO SUCK WATERMELONS!
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!
🙂
“… vampire bats to team up with the killer bees…” and then they all find Big Foot, ghosts and aliens (the real gods) and they kill us all! (See various “science” channels for more terrifying information!)
Few readers would know this, but the ONLY native mammals in New Zealand are bats. Before humans arrived some hundreds of years ago there were no rats, mice, stoats, rabbits, cats, dogs, sheep, pigs, deer etc. There still are no snakes, wolves, lions, tigers, crocodiles etc apart from those in zoos.
Reading this, both my son and daughter (both aged 20) are hoping that further ‘climate progress’ will result in a resurgence of Zombies in Hertfordshire
Just rescind their passports – problem solved
I took my 2 yr old to the zoo last week. A fellow was describing to the audience how climate change has upset the diet of sea lions. He then went on to talk about over fishing. I approached him after the show and asked him what was the evidence that climate change, rather than over fishing had effected the sea lions’ diet. As expected, he didn’t have a clue. These days “climate change” just rolls off the tongue as an excuse for everything.
Yeah, this is why the land south of Texas is uninhabitable for gringos. And now Mexicans migrate North to suck the life blood out of true Americans. Scary.
On the bright side, desmodus rotundus is not on the endangered species list, although rabid Latinos ruthlessly hunt them. In light of this, warming or not, the right of asylum should be granted to the cute little things ASAP on American soil.
On behalf of all Brits and those of Brit descent globally (whether they like it or not) I wish to apologise for the incipient takeover of the known universe by batkind.
The Germans can apologise for themselves……
Great News from Australia Anthony. Sorry I know off topic.
Victorian government to abandon emissions target:
27 Mar 2012
Restrictions on new coal-fired power stations in Victoria won’t proceed and the state’s 20 per cent greenhouse gas reduction target has been dumped.The coalition won’t go ahead with the former Labor government’s plan to make it illegal for coal-fired power stations in Victoria to emit more than 0.8 tonnes of carbon per megawatt hour.The state’s greenhouse gas emissions reduction target will also go, after modelling conducted by economic consulting firm ACIL Tasman found it would cost Victoria $2.2 billion to buy international offsets. Environment Minister Ryan Smith said Victoria’s environment and climate change policies were under review and would not be confirmed until after talks with state and federal environment ministers in May.”There is a federal target of five per cent – I don’t believe that Victorians should pay four times the cost of their state counterparts,” he told reporters on Tuesday.”We will be working in concert with the federal government to see what programs that we currently have in place are appropriate to maintain.”Energy Minister Michael O’Brien said the government decided not to proceed with restrictions on new coal-fired power stations partly because the commonwealth had not introduced national standards.”The combination of commonwealth policies and market conditions have the practical effect that no new coal-fired power stations will be economically viable unless they are based on modern technology with significantly lower emissions,” he said in a statement.Environment Victoria chief executive Kelly O’Shanassy said Premier Ted Baillieu had caved in to the demands of polluters by scrapping the higher greenhouse gas reduction target.”It’s a terrible decision by the Baillieu government and basically puts the nail in the coffin for a clean energy future for Victoria,” she told reporters.”It’s environmentally reckless … the Baillieu government either don’t believe in climate change, don’t understand the impacts of climate change or don’t care.”Victorian Employers’ Chamber of Commerce and Industry (VECCI) chief economist Steven Wojtkiw said scrapping the state target would take pressure off business.”We already have a national emissions reduction target and the impending carbon tax, so it’s good news for Victorian business,” he told reporters.”The fact that we were at risk of having two targets, two plans, two burdens, and costs on business, meant that would put jobs and investment at risk.”Opposition Leader Daniel Andrews said investment in wind power had dried up since the coalition had come to power and introduced some of the most restrictive planning laws in the world.
Hurrah, see guys us Australians have some common sense after all, lol I mean “Us’ NOT the watermelon Labour and Green voters. We Australians will throw the scumbags into the ocean and they can all walk across to Tasmania on their pond scum to be with their best mate Bob Green opps Brown.
[Look up at the top edge. There is a “Tips” listing. O/T “you ought to know” items belong there in the future. -ModE]
We can’t be sure this would be bad. Yes, introducing new animals may put pressure on the local ecosystem but that’s evolution in progress.
On the other hand increasing the habitat range for the vampire bat is good for the vampire bat. And thus reduces their vulnerability to habitat destruction. This could be good for biodiversity. Perhaps it should be encouraged.
Indeed, I’ve long wanted to introduce hippopotami to Tewkesbury, the confluence of the Rivers Severn and Avon. Such a colony could help preserve the species and boost tourism in my native Gloucestershire, UK.
There’s a modest, but important, place in history for the first person to work out how to train vampire bats (or any other flying creature) how to identify and bring down the snooping surveillance drones currently being developed and deployed by authoritarian governments around the world. Those are the only flying things we should be worrying about.
The biggest worry with bats is of course Rabies.
My biggest worry with bats is going off the ladder backwards. They sleep behind the second story shutters, and when I’m painting the house, they pop out from behind and zoom straight up between my face and the paint brush…
Maybe the vampire bats will eat the killer bees or vice versa?
“Climate change”? brings bats to Austin? Austin boasted the world’s largest colony of Mexican Free-tailed bats back when I first crossed Town Lake on the Congress Avenue bridge in 1976. The colony thrives because of *habitat* improvement – the damming of the River to form Town Lake attracted the mosquitoes, and building the bridge gave the bats a place to live right next to their food supply. The bats also enjoy abandoned buildings and old smokestacks, which were common enough at the time.
Gail Combs: Why Bat Houses are Important: Why should you put up a bat house?
Don’t think I ever heard of bat houses until I talked to the weather station observer in Coleville, WA. I think I inadvertently got pictures of two of her bathouses in this picture:
http://gallery.surfacestations.org/main.php?g2_itemId=72386&g2_imageViewsIndex=4
You have to zoom way in to see them. One of them looks like a flagpole. I believe right at the top you can see a box, but you’re looking at it from the side. I’m pretty sure this is a bat house. Not so sure about the other, it is maybe 6 feet off the ground and much clearer. It also appears in the background of the Coleville Looking East picture.
All hail “Lord Bat” may his rule be long and may we all prosper.
But I have the sneaking suspicion he would suck 🙂
Not to worry, the wind turbines will take them out as that apparently is all they are good for.
BTW, the bats have been under that bridge in Austin for years, Its a tourist attraction rating right up there with Austin Zoo, known as 6th street
Whoop. Gigem Aggies ( except for Dessler and North)