Just when you think things can’t get any more bizarre with the IPCC, having just learned that the IPPC 2007 report used magazine articles for references, head of the IPCC, Dr. Rajenda Pachauri, provides comedy gold. According to the UK Telegraph, he’s just released what they describe as a “smutty” romance novel, Return to Almora laced with steamy sex, lots of sex. Oh, and Shirley MacLaine.
Here’s the good doctor, grinning like a Cheshire cat at his book launch in India on January 10th.
The Telegraph’s Robert Mendick and Amrit Dhillon in Delhi write:
As the UN’s climate change chief, Dr Rajendra Pachauri has spent his career writing only the driest of academic articles. But the latest offering from the chairman of the UN’s climate change panel is an altogether racier tome.
Some might even suggest Dr Pachauri’s first novel is frankly smutty.
WARNING ADULT CONTENT FOLLOWS:
(First time I’ve had to do that on WUWT)
Return to Almora, published in Dr Pachauri’s native India earlier this month, tells the story of Sanjay Nath, an academic in his 60s reminiscing on his “spiritual journey” through India, Peru and the US.
On the way he encounters, among others, Shirley MacLaine, the actress, who appears as a character in the book. While relations between Sanjay and MacLaine remain platonic, he enjoys sex – a lot of sex – with a lot of women.
In breathless prose that risks making Dr Pachauri, who will be 70 this year, a laughing stock among the serious, high-minded scientists and world leaders with whom he mixes, he details sexual encounter after sexual encounter.
The book, which makes reference to the Kama Sutra, starts promisingly enough as it tells the story of a climate expert with a lament for the denuded mountain slopes of Nainital, in northern India, where deforestation by the timber mafia and politicians has “endangered the fragile ecosystem”.
But talk of “denuding” is a clue of what is to come.
By page 16, Sanjay is ready for his first liaison with May in a hotel room in Nainital. “She then led him into the bedroom,” writes Dr Pachauri.
“She removed her gown, slipped off her nightie and slid under the quilt on his bed… Sanjay put his arms around her and kissed her, first with quick caresses and then the kisses becoming longer and more passionate.
“May slipped his clothes off one by one, removing her lips from his for no more than a second or two.
“Afterwards she held him close. ‘Sandy, I’ve learned something for the first time today. You are absolutely superb after meditation. Why don’t we make love every time immediately after you have meditated?’.”
More follows, including Sanjay and friends queuing to have sexual encounters with Sajni, an impoverished but willing local: “Sanjay saw a shapely dark-skinned girl lying on Vinay’s bed. He was overcome by a lust that he had never known before … He removed his clothes and began to feel Sajni’s body, caressing her voluptuous breasts.”
Take a cold shower, and read the rest of the steamy (possibly a water vapor feedback loop) novel at the Telegraph here
Note to the U.N. – Time to kick Pachy to the curb, he’s not just toast now, he’s carbonized.
In other news, The Love Guru has this relevant quote from a hockey team member: “there’s no connection between hockey and my love life”
UPDATE: Steve McIntyre quips:
In breaking news, Vivid Entertainment has bought the film rights to the IPCC Fourth Assessment Report. They plan to give new meaning to the terms Working Group 1, Working Group 2 and Working Group 3. They promise to give “peer review” an entirely new interpretation.
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FergalR (23:03:29) :
Good Lord have mercy. From the Times of India’s glowing review of the magnum opus:
“Sanjay is always noticing breasts and masturbating (once into a red silk hanky purloined from a train co-passenger”
IPPC funeral:
Snot to snot;
Rushes to rushes.
“Pachauri has been busy launching a softcore novel about the sexual adventures of a CLIMATE EXPERT in his late 60s”
Not an autobiography then!
IMF proposed $100 BILLION ‘Green Fund’
http://www.marketwatch.com/story/imf-introduces-100-billion-green-fund-2010-01-30
Maybe Pachauri and Bin Laden could get together to write a film script. They could call it “Sex, lies and videotape”.
What is it with these freaks to brag about their (imagined?) sex life in fiction books. Our former president (yes I’m french) Valéry Giscard D’Estaing also commited two pornographic books. In the last one he even bragged about laying Princess Diana, or so it was sold in the french media.
Bring on the Harlequins!
” A chap I sing in church with who works a the Met Office….’
Apologies to Leonard Bernstein, et al
When you’re a Met, you’re as Met as can be:
If you just place your bet on the IPCC
When you’re a Met, when the /snip/ hits the fan
You’ve got comrades galore who will cover your can.
Simple Explanation: Anthropogenic Career Change
Drop your novel while the fires are hottest and free promotion “Shazam!” is at the highest. Instant new well paying career while people rush to buy your book just to mock you or support you, who cares why they are doing it the important part is that they are buying the book.
This really is a “Get out of the IPCC” card with an extra couple million in book sales parting gift.
Hey Bill Clinton, eat your heart out.
I note that the Amazon.com the current top selections for Search [Books][Climategate] sorted by Bestselling are:
#1. Climategate: The Crutape Letters (Volume 1) by Steven Mosher and Thomas W. Fuller (Paperback – Jan 14, 2010), New $16.99; 4 stars [10]. Amazon Sales Rank #2,873 in Books.
#2. Dire Predictions: Understanding Global Warming by Michael E. Mann and Lee R. Kump (Paperback – Jul 21, 2008)), New $16.50; 4 stars [10]. Amazon Sales Rank #6,594 in Books.
#3. Global Warming False Alarm: The Bad Science Behind the United Nations’ Assertion that Man-made CO2 Causes Global Warming by Ralph B. Alexander (Perfect Paperback – Jul 10, 2009)), New $18.95; 5 stars [8]. Amazon Sales Rank #28,051 in Books.
#4. Red Hot Lies: How Global Warming Alarmists Use Threats, Fraud, and Deception to Keep You Misinformed by Christopher C. Horner (Hardcover – Nov 11, 2008)), New $16.99; 4 stars [60]. Amazon Sales Rank #47,109 in Books.
#5. Climategate: A Meteorologist Exposes the Global Warming Scam by Brian Sussman (Hardcover – April 2010)), New, Preorder $16.83; not rated. Amazon Sales Rank #31,406 in Books.
Dr Pachauri’s prose may be ‘breathless’ as in COPD, but it is certainly not ‘deathless’. The late Indian novelist Narayan, or the still early V.S. Naipaul (Trinidadian of Indian ancestry) have nothing to fear.
“Alan the Brit (04:13:50) :
Now I know what caused that sudden uptick on the Hockey Stick!!!”
I am pretty sure he did not write the Karma Sutra, but he’s made some contorted statements lately.
I believe Tom Lehrer predicted something like this.
I am never forget the day my first book is published.
Every chapter I stole from somewhere else.
Index I copy from old Vladivostok telephone directory.
This book was sensational!
Pravda – well, Pravda – Pravda said: “Zhil-bil korol kogda-to, pree nyom blokha zhila” It stinks.
But Izvestia! Izvestia said: “Ya idoo kuda sam czar idyot peshkom!”
It stinks.
Metro-Goldwyn-Moskva buys movie rights for six million rubles,
Changing title to ‘The Eternal Triangle’,
With Ingrid Bergman playing part of hypotenuse.
And who deserves the credit?
And who deserves the blame?
Nicolai Ivanovich Lobachevsky is his name.
Hi!
There is an old piece of advise from teachers of writing, that the student must remember; everything except sex, is inherently boring, and it is the mark of a good writer that he/she can make their subject interesting. However, judging by the, admitedly short excerpts, Pachauri has failed to make even sex interesting. It seems to be a poorly written piece of nonsense, with sex just happening to be the main theme – it might as well have been a story about a man travelling around India and fixing motorcycles on his journey.
Even the cheap “romance” genre is more stimulating, because the main characters have to “jouste” with each other for a while, before reaching that moment of consumation. It is this back and fro action that draws the reader into the characters and helps them anticipate the consumation.
In the “porno” genre, characterisation are thrown out, in order to get to the sexually explicity material as quickly as possible, but even here the writer has to build up some sexual tension between the characters and involve the emotional dynamic of the reader by getting into the thoughts and emotions of one of the actors. If a writer simply wrote, “he covered her in kisses, ripped off her clothes, threw her onto the bed and . . .” it would be about as erotic as the description of a gynocologist performing a cervix examination.
But, I haven’t read the book, so perhaps I’m being a little harsh. Maybe D. H. Lawrence has a rival.
Now that he is famous and soon to be out of work; its time to launch out on second literary career. I wonder if he will do a book tour of Pakistan.
Ladies and gentlemen
We now have green porn books from green porn star to read while you wait 3 hours to have your hot electric set of wheels charging.
OK, there’s definitely more than enough evidence to call into question the whole of the IPCC. It must be fully investigated in various ways, including corruption and fraud. There’s absolutely no doubt about it. It’s only a matter of time before some of these clowns are in a court defending themselves. Whether they are guilty or not is up to the court system, but it’s now got to the point charges MUST be handed out to many of them, especially the chairman of the IPCC. If not then this will eventually backfire on the politicians so badly many will lose their careers for life as they are booted out of office. It’s time for them to all come clean or else.
“We can’t account for the failure of moral standards to rise, and it’s a transvesty that we can’t”
I feel a title thingy coming on……..Scum dog and now millionaire
Makes you wonder what these guys do off-hours at all these save-the-world conferences.
I guess it just isn’t getting hot and steamy enough in the real climate, and so they have to compensate by fantasizing about other hot and steamy stuff.
Maybe Pachauri and Bin Laden could get together to write a film script. They could call it “Sex, lies and videotape”.
That should read today as ‘Sex, lies and Audiotape’.
Pachauri alone would write ‘Sex, lies and crutape’.
You have no idea of the very colorful language and tone he uses describing ‘skeptics’.
This is insane.
Instead of “Return to Almora” he could have named it “Return to Gomorrah”
Future climate: warmer, wilder, wetter!
Just as predicted by the models.
Climate models, that is. Ahem. Not the other kind.
FergalR (20:04:32) :
UK climate secretary “Ed Miliband declares war on climate change sceptics” http://www.guardian.co.uk/environment/2010/jan/31/ed-miliband-climate-change-scepticism
Most people’s political play book contains a limited number of pages. Page one is almost always dodge and deflect. Recently, I have seen a lot of “doubling down”.
In the game of Blackjack, the term “double down” refers to a player option of doubling their bet and receiving one and only one more card.
Some examples:
http://politicalcalculations.blogspot.com/2005/07/doubling-down.html
http://blogs.dailymail.com/donsurber/archives/7815
and now your link,
“However, Miliband was adamant that the IPCC was on the right track. “It’s worth saying that no doubt when the next report comes out it will suggest there have been areas where things have been happening more dramatically than the 2007 report implied,” he said.
The danger of climate scepticism was that it would undermine public support for unpopular decisions needed to curb carbon emissions, including the likelihood of higher energy bills for households, and issues such as the visual impact of wind turbines, said Miliband, who is also energy secretary.”
You only double down when you have a strong hand and your opponent has a weak hand. My take away is that the AGW establishment still feels secure in their entrenched positions and look out and see the opposition as a bunch of bloggers; David and Goliath. This is a good thing because we all know how that story ended.
Successful people learn when things get painful. Unsuccessful people “stay the course” when it is obvious that the course is leading over the cliff. Truly spectacular losers, like Miliband, EPA Administrator Lisa Jackson, and Pachauri, double down on the wrong course. My only hope is that they don’t come to their senses before (for the first two) the electorate smashes them, and for Pachauri that the newly elected democratic governments make him irrelevant.
Mike Ramsey