We Need a Name for the Imaginary Planet Simulated by Climate Models for the IPCC

Guest Post by Bob Tisdale

I recently ran across an article by Chelsea Harvey for BusinessInsider. It was the title that grabbed my attention: This Map Shows How Climate Change Will Screw The Whole World. Not just parts of the world, the “Whole World”. Wow. Interest piqued, I discovered she was referring to Figure 2.4 from the IPCC’s Climate Change 2014 Synthesis Report (longer report), shown below. It appears to be the same as Figure SPM.8 from the 2014 Synthesis Report Summary for Policymakers. The author described the map of future risks as a “handy chart”. I love handy charts.

IPCC SYR Full Figure 2.4

The map resembles the planet Earth, where most of us reside. The continents are in the right places, and so are the oceans. But we know that’s not the Earth. The risks illustrated are based on climate models, and we know that climate models used by the IPCC for their reports are not based on Earth’s actual climate, as it has existed in the past, or as it exists now. The maps output by climate models may resemble our Earth, but they’re fantasy maps of a fantasy world. They create nothing more than an illusion…an illusion that is intended to make it look like bad things will happen in the future if we all do not agree to reduce our carbon footprints.

We need a name for the imaginary planet simulated by climate models—a planet that looks like Earth, but is not Earth. I’ll propose the climate-modeled planet be called TurnsToCrap. No matter how the modelers present the product of their endeavors, they show the planet TurnsToCrap.

 

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The Ghost Of Big Jim Cooley
November 14, 2014 12:09 pm

Tamino

george e. smith
Reply to  The Ghost Of Big Jim Cooley
November 14, 2014 12:18 pm

Or Pamina ?

Editor
Reply to  The Ghost Of Big Jim Cooley
November 14, 2014 12:32 pm

As in The Lost Planet of Tamino? Didn’t I read a short story about that here? 🙂

RomanM
November 14, 2014 12:11 pm

Carbonaira.

milodonharlani
Reply to  RomanM
November 14, 2014 1:19 pm

Charth.

Transport by Zeppelin
November 14, 2014 12:11 pm

Climaticus Simulatis Fakegaterous

RomanM
November 14, 2014 12:12 pm

Alternatively, Carbonerror

O2BNAZ2
November 14, 2014 12:13 pm

Miri, from Star Trek: The Enterprise discovers an Earth-like planet that was devastated by a horrific degenerative disease and is now populated entirely by impossibly old children. The disease is starting to affect the landing party, their nerves are frayed and their tempers are short. Now infected with the disease and crying, they find comfort in the arms of Captain Kirk (Dr. Mann)
http://en.memory-alpha.org/wiki/Miri_(episode)

Mac the Knife
Reply to  O2BNAZ2
November 14, 2014 12:32 pm

“Bonk on the head, mean grr’up! Bonk on the head!”

Zeke
Reply to  O2BNAZ2
November 14, 2014 12:38 pm

“Beaming down, the landing party of Captain Kirk, Spock, Dr. McCoy, Janice Rand and two security men discover architecture like that of Earth, circa 1960. But there is debris in the streets and evidence that decay has been ongoing for at least several centuries, and that the distress signal is automated.”
A planet over-run and decaying under eternal adolescents, starting in 1960. What a zinger! (: I didn’t say it.

Eamon Butler
Reply to  Zeke
November 14, 2014 4:55 pm

That’s life Jim (Hansen) but not as we know it.

Reply to  O2BNAZ2
November 14, 2014 1:16 pm

Damn! I was hoping no one had beaten me to that one!
+1

garymount
Reply to  O2BNAZ2
November 14, 2014 3:45 pm

I just so happen to have just watched that episode. Miri was the name of one of the inhabitants of the planet.
– – –
I have conducted an extensive poll and it is unequivocal that the name of this planet should be Gary.

November 14, 2014 12:13 pm

Though it’s still early in the NHL 2014-2015 season, I would go with Clemmensen, since there’s a hockey stick present that serves no apparent function*.
*As of this post, Scott Clemmensen of the New Jersey Devils (which team name in itself brings to mind the searing heat claimed by CAGW boosters) has the worst Goals Allowed Average and Save Percentage of any goalie in the NHL this season.

Mike Bryant
November 14, 2014 12:14 pm

Fear Sphere

milodonharlani
Reply to  Mike Bryant
November 14, 2014 12:55 pm

Says it all.

Reply to  Mike Bryant
November 14, 2014 4:41 pm

Terror Firma

Reply to  Mike Bryant
November 14, 2014 4:46 pm

Terror Sphere
Terra Fear

Reply to  Mike Bryant
November 17, 2014 9:00 am

Fear Sphere is not merely funny; it is accurate and comprehensible.

milodonharlani
November 14, 2014 12:15 pm

Imaginearth.

george e. smith
November 14, 2014 12:17 pm

How about….Dirt……or …….Dert…??

george e. smith
Reply to  george e. smith
November 17, 2014 6:31 pm

D’Ert you e’diot !

milodonharlani
November 14, 2014 12:19 pm

Planet CMIP-6.

Mike O
November 14, 2014 12:19 pm

Did I miss?
Planet GORE

Mike Bryant
November 14, 2014 12:19 pm

Politicalwhimsy

Resourceguy
November 14, 2014 12:20 pm

Boxerville
Waxman
Nancy Says
Kalifornia

earwig42
November 14, 2014 12:21 pm

Planet HOOEY
In memory of Reid Bryson who many consider to be the father of SCIENTIFIC climatology.

November 14, 2014 12:22 pm

Ring World.

nielszoo
Reply to  Gunga Din
November 14, 2014 3:29 pm

But Niven’s math is far more likely to be proved right than the GCM’s are.

Bob B.
November 14, 2014 12:23 pm

Grant

higley7
November 14, 2014 12:23 pm

Planet COPRO. Just a suggestion, but I think it applies quite well.

Rick
November 14, 2014 12:24 pm

Somewhere for the warmistas to live: “Conned-Doh!Money-Errm!
Okay, time for me to go, I think.

dickon66
Reply to  Rick
November 14, 2014 12:25 pm

Or just call it “The Money Pit”.

November 14, 2014 12:26 pm

Globe-Ka-Bob.

November 14, 2014 12:27 pm

Earthwarm

November 14, 2014 12:29 pm

Dearth

Editor
Reply to  Tim Whittle
November 14, 2014 12:35 pm

I read through the whole list to see if this had been chosen. I should’ve just search for it!

nutso fasst
Reply to  Ric Werme
November 14, 2014 12:58 pm

Inextremis

nutso fasst
Reply to  Ric Werme
November 14, 2014 1:03 pm

Oops, wrong place…
I came late to this game and also thought “Dearth” but searched first.

Reply to  Tim Whittle
November 14, 2014 3:26 pm

I also like “Dearth”
where live the Dearthlings.

Ian H
November 14, 2014 12:29 pm

Terra. Or Terror.

November 14, 2014 12:29 pm

Planet Huh?

H.R.
Reply to  Gunga Din
November 14, 2014 3:37 pm

Nice one, Gunga. Depending on how you say it and where you put the inflection, it can carry a load of sarcasm.

Resourceguy
November 14, 2014 12:30 pm

Dune
LameDuckia
Faux
Psychops
Fundraisia
GreenPlace
Planet CrazyAnt

milodonharlani
Reply to  Resourceguy
November 14, 2014 12:32 pm

Falsefidia.

steven strittmatter
November 14, 2014 12:30 pm

Algore-an. (As in a great disturbance in The Farce)

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