Guest Post by Bob Tisdale
I recently ran across an article by Chelsea Harvey for BusinessInsider. It was the title that grabbed my attention: This Map Shows How Climate Change Will Screw The Whole World. Not just parts of the world, the “Whole World”. Wow. Interest piqued, I discovered she was referring to Figure 2.4 from the IPCC’s Climate Change 2014 Synthesis Report (longer report), shown below. It appears to be the same as Figure SPM.8 from the 2014 Synthesis Report Summary for Policymakers. The author described the map of future risks as a “handy chart”. I love handy charts.
The map resembles the planet Earth, where most of us reside. The continents are in the right places, and so are the oceans. But we know that’s not the Earth. The risks illustrated are based on climate models, and we know that climate models used by the IPCC for their reports are not based on Earth’s actual climate, as it has existed in the past, or as it exists now. The maps output by climate models may resemble our Earth, but they’re fantasy maps of a fantasy world. They create nothing more than an illusion…an illusion that is intended to make it look like bad things will happen in the future if we all do not agree to reduce our carbon footprints.
We need a name for the imaginary planet simulated by climate models—a planet that looks like Earth, but is not Earth. I’ll propose the climate-modeled planet be called TurnsToCrap. No matter how the modelers present the product of their endeavors, they show the planet TurnsToCrap.
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Planet of the Apes
Whatever you call it, I know where it’s inhabitants are. They apparently are vacationing in Australia on a beach.
Planet Colonoscopy.
GIGO …garbage in, garbage out
Sorry, good one, but already proposed. Maybe time to close the nominations & let Bob pick a winner.
Nah. After 629 good answers, replies, and comments?
Why stop?
To avoid repeats perhaps people should use “Control F” and search for their proposal to see if it’s been taken?
Planet GIGO (garbage in = garbage out)
I nominate “Fudge”
Since the sea levels are advancing alarmingly it will soon be, “Water World”
Where are they advancing so dangerously? Where do you, Mike Bryant, so fear a rise of inches per century?
They are advancing rapidly in the minds of the alarmists… On the imaginary planet we are naming…
Gaia – revenge
Cloud Cuckoo Land
Soylent Green. Hey, it was a great concept, just hard to get people to accept it.
Planet Kludgey
As it fits the dictionary definition –
http://www.merriam-webster.com/dictionary/kludge
kludge
: a system and especially a computer system made up of poorly matched components
— kludgy also kludgey adjective
GISSTemper.
Climax
Just name planet “HTRAE” because the physical science is apparently 180° out of phase with that of planet EARTH, and there’s really no need to be able to pronounce the name because the planet can never exist.
I would suggest
Silliw. In honor of Willis and his mandatory double on this new world. \
PBH
Climocatastrophonicusmajor
Must be the constellation it is in.
Neverland
Mathflunkaland
Grauniad
or
Flappypig
simulon
decarbonia (accent on the ‘o’)
concoctia or concocton
phonycon
deludia or deludion
artificia
All excellent!
POSIT
Lielium (A world entirely lacking in truth.)
Neversnow (No really, snow is just not going to happen there. Never ever.)
Gigolia (The world of garbage in garbage out.)
Hokey (Where hockey sticks rule.)
Noradat (No, you can’t see my raw data.)
Fakearth (should be obvious)
Eugenica.
After that evil pseudo science of the last century.
good one
for crappy science how about:
Piltdown
Pauling’s Helix
Debendoxia
Pons/Fleischmann
Brodeuria
Y2K
Planet Boob [a binary planet system – the orbiting sister planet is called “Bob” to avoid confusion] located 7 trillion light years from reality. The name is self explanatory.
I like a more appropriate name like…
Hydra or Liquida or The Water Planet.
They should call it Dolos.
(Greek for deceit.)
R
Thanks everyone, my ribs hurt from laughing (you will be hearing from my personal injury lawyer).
http://classicalvalues.com/2014/11/new-names-and-other-dangers/