Guest Post by Bob Tisdale
I recently ran across an article by Chelsea Harvey for BusinessInsider. It was the title that grabbed my attention: This Map Shows How Climate Change Will Screw The Whole World. Not just parts of the world, the “Whole World”. Wow. Interest piqued, I discovered she was referring to Figure 2.4 from the IPCC’s Climate Change 2014 Synthesis Report (longer report), shown below. It appears to be the same as Figure SPM.8 from the 2014 Synthesis Report Summary for Policymakers. The author described the map of future risks as a “handy chart”. I love handy charts.
The map resembles the planet Earth, where most of us reside. The continents are in the right places, and so are the oceans. But we know that’s not the Earth. The risks illustrated are based on climate models, and we know that climate models used by the IPCC for their reports are not based on Earth’s actual climate, as it has existed in the past, or as it exists now. The maps output by climate models may resemble our Earth, but they’re fantasy maps of a fantasy world. They create nothing more than an illusion…an illusion that is intended to make it look like bad things will happen in the future if we all do not agree to reduce our carbon footprints.
We need a name for the imaginary planet simulated by climate models—a planet that looks like Earth, but is not Earth. I’ll propose the climate-modeled planet be called TurnsToCrap. No matter how the modelers present the product of their endeavors, they show the planet TurnsToCrap.
How about “Alarmaworld” .
451F
My idea~!
Well, if its a model, then it has to be the Planet Kardashian.
Spectacularly and obviously fake, but everyone still wants to go along that it actually makes sense that it is so popular.
Planet Kardashian-Jenner.
A fake jut butt-lift on one end and a face-lift fading into sexual reassignment surgery on the other.
Planet Mosher-Stokes.
Good one — the planet that races around its sun, makes every excuse imaginable & announces it’s the BEST planet of all.
Bob.
“Unearth” or “Stupiter” (like Jupiter)
Since the models are premised upon models ‘all the way down’ in ad nauseam, the climate-modeled planet could be called:
Planet ‘Ad Nauseam’
John
There is so many things wrong, just wrong, immoral, dishonest, and misleading about the sysnthesis report chart, it is difficult to know where to start.
Maybe a place to start is with its landing a starring role in the next Dumb and Dumber movie.
Wilson
. . . love that one . . .
John
Gaiatopia
Terra Incognita
. . . wonderful . . .
John
I already live there, after it was discovered and became Australia.
My entry: Posit
Dave
Nah, for Australians the only possible name must surely be Flannery. Check Google if you doubt this.
Since the models are fundamentally circular logic and since therefore they call up the image of the mythic serpent Ouroboros eating its own tail thus forming a symbolic circle, then the climate-modeled planet could be called:
Planet ‘Ouroboros’
John
There is only one viable answer. “SimEarth”, named after the only climate model suitably packaged: as a video game.
Uarth
[REPLY: No, I think not, “Gordon Ford/juan/beckleybud/H Grouse, etc. You are permanently persona non grata here. If your comments get through by mistake, they will be deleted within minutes. ~another mod.]
[And as long as you use bad email addresses, you will be erased. .mod]
Planet Hypochondrius
Climato.
Pinch it, it may respond.
It’s “complex”, as in the square root of -1 that is called “imaginary” as opposed to real.
HALworld — Hansen’s Assorted Lies. Hansen’s Alarmist Legacy. Hansen’s Apocalyptic Lunacy.
Like it. Was wondering how to work in HAL from Space Odyssey 2001.
This would be HAL from Climate Ship of Fools 1988.
HAL was named by taking IBM and going backwards one letter for each letter in the name. Bit of useless trivia.
Definition Guy, so IPCC becomes HOBB. Got it.
Since the modelers after 30 years haven’t matched observations, the climate-modeled planet could be called:
‘SONG’ World
SONG = Skeptical Observations Non Gratis
John
Climastrophe
or Climatastrophe (or Homer-ized, Climatastromaphe)
Peggy Lee would be a good name. They give her fever.
Gaiarea
Dunning-Kruger or Anosognosia.
Of course, the inhabitants will never realize it refers to them.
This might be the most effective response to the climate *rau*s yet. Ridicule is a powerful weapon.