From the ‘climate change is the universal boogeyman’ department comes this ridiculous claim from the National Resources Defense Council (NRDC)
Now the left wants to tell us how to wipe, and people aren’t having it. Some of the responses are hilarious, others are in the vein of “WTF is wrong with you people?”. They’ve really stepped in it this time.
I particularly appreciate the use of the word “virgin”, as in We are almost out of virgin forests!!!. As if forests do not grow back?
The green blob hates anything people do because they hate people.
For me it is … “arboreal” ! Ohhhhhh mammmaaa NOT the Arboreals!!!!
That’s a very foresty kind of forest, its got trees and electrolytes!!
Ha! extra foresty… indeed
America reverts to corn cobs; farmers break into happy dance.
They fail to understand that trees are a crop and have been since man has been able to cut them down and use them.
They fail to understand.
But first they hate themselves. Projecting that hate on to others is their only hope of redemption.
How the hell is Captain Kirk supposed to wipe out the Klingons now?
https://nationalpost.com/news/canada/u-s-plush-toilet-paper-use-wiping-out-canadas-forests-flushing-away-the-future-report?video_autoplay=true#comments-area
The boreal zone is Canada’s largest vegetation zone, making up 55 per cent of the country’s land mass. It extends from Yukon and northern British Columbia in the west to Newfoundland and Labrador in the east.
If Canada’s boreal zone was a country, it would be the 7th largest in the world, somewhat smaller than Australia but much larger than India.
I don’t think we’re going to run out of boreal forest any time soon. Probably never.
The two biggest countries in the world by land area are Russia and Canada, and about half of both countries are covered by forest. Brazil, the USA and many other large and small countries are also heavily forest-covered, so we’re not going to run out of toilet paper any time soon.
This hysterical nonsense is just another phony scare by the duplicitous red-greens. I suggest they take their toilet paper, like their solar power, and “Stick it where the Sun don’t shine!”.
Enjoy your weekend, Allan 🙂
http://www.borealforest.org/world/rus_mgmt.htm
Sprawling from the Baltic Sea to the Pacific Ocean, Russia has 22% of the world’s forest area (as defined by FAO) – the most in the world. By comparison, the next largest forest countries are: Brazil with 16%, Canada 7% and U.S. 6 % of the world’s forest cover. The most often referred figure for Russia’s total forested area is 763.5 million hectares (equal to 1.87 billion acres). There is, however, some doubt about the origin and accuracy of this figure.
http://wattsupwiththat.com/2011/11/18/make-29-on-your-money-guaranteed/#more-51396
Thanks to VMartin, who made a very informative post at November 20, 2011 at 5:28 pm, indicating that wind power is even more wasteful and inefficient than we already surmised.
“Wind Power – It doesn’t just blow, it SUCKS!”
“Solar Power – Stick it where the Sun don’t shine!”
Don’t people realize that trees for paper are grown on tree farms not cutting down National Forests?
https://www.treefarmsystem.org/
“Anyone who doesn’t wipe with a dried corn-cob (as the original inhabitants of the US did) or at least use a handful of dry leaves or sand is literally a horrible person!”
– The Left
Joe,
A few generations later country-folks recycled catalog pages from Sears,
Roebuck & Co/Marshall Fields, etc., along with their old newspapers
(which had a high cotton content back then) to replace the old corn cob.
A shimmering ribald echo of the era you’re talking about is reflected in the
popular “corn hole” bean bag tossing games played by today’s youth…
which is nothing more than a softy version of horseshoes.
Keep on chucking…
I can’t imagine anyone who spent time watching Beevis and Butthead playing corn hole with a straight face. I was absolutely astonished when I found out there was a game called Corn Hole played at church picnics and community get-togethers.
I’m with you, icisil. Did these people just wake up a couple of years ago? Do they know no history whatsoever?
Yeah, I shake my head every time I hear them advertise this type of contest.
Really. I was watching TV a while back and they had the ACL on. ACL= American Cornhole League. With spectators and everything.
Just today I had to watch a training about “Drug Free Workplace”. Part of the drug testing part included a graphic of a worker at a urinal with a guy standing next to him holding a clipboard.
omigosh I just found this
https://customcornhole.com/beavis-and-butthead-cornholio-cornhole-wraps/
And the old A-Z Telephone directories !!!!
Sagebrush. But watch out for rattlers.
Well pine cones come in handy in the colder areas that lack corn cobs.
Islam; Eat with left, wipe with right.
My tweet in response to this was:
@Willis Eschenbach
Jul 17
w.
I advocate for the reduction of government paperwork so that we can all enjoy more and plusher toilet paper. Personal paperwork is the future.
Why does toilet paper in the US have two sheets?
Because they have to send one copy to Washington.
Hey with that expensive stuff you can cut the use by 75% with splitting the ply!
The submarine method could be used. Due to limited storage space and supplies, a single square per event was used. You’d poke a hole in the middle of the square and put it over a finger. Then wipe the backside and use the square to clean the finger. 🙂
i laughed so hard I had to go to the toilet;-))) lol
We’re not shaking hands W.
I’m sure the answer is regulating toilet paper thickness. And taxing thick paper.
… pulls another yard of paper, then wraps it twelwefold before reaching for bide’ shower.
the only thing that works >
I’m not going back to John Wayne toilet paper, the kind that don’t take no chit off nobody… they will have to pry my Charmin out of my cold dead fingers…
Izal!
Just spread it all around!
My wife is British… only reason I figured this one out!
https://www.independent.co.uk/news/uk/this-britain/minor-british-institutions-izal-toilet-paper-1727294.html
You forgot the “It’s rough and tough and doesn’t take….”
John Wayne toilet paper. Rough and white.
Well, I’m willing to listen to Those People if they will agree to not defecate or urinate at all for a minimum of three consecutive weeks, and will also agree to donate their personal incomes to my slush fund for three years.
I think that’s fair, don’t you?
Please no!. They are already full of it.
Sara, “slush fund” or flush fund?
Yet another great opportunity simply Flushed Away
In North Korea they sell their poo back to the government for energy – it burns better than most things !!! There is a video on YouTube showing the poor souls sitting in a line with their little bags.
Stop using Toilet paper!
Start using The Guardian.
It is all it is good for.
Problem solved.
CJ Fritz
Going to make a helluva mess of my PC screen. 🙂
Just use some white-out on the stains… problem solved…
That and lighting the fire.
It is also worth noting the Guardian is already full of s*** so, as it is already contaminated its use in the bathroom is now yesterdays news….
Bbbut how will you know if it is used or not?
along with the NY Times and the Washington post!
Makes a mess of the touch screen.
There should be an app.
Using solar and wind power where the moon don’t shine could be painful.
Mr. Whipple, call your office…
Mr Whipple was caught squeezing the Charmin in the stock room.
I didn’t realize children had to be taught how to wipe. We were going through a lot (I mean a lot) of toilet paper in my house. One day I realized my 7 year old was taking the toilet paper, wrapping around his hand ~10-20 times and then using that like a glove to wipe with.
At some point, yes it is too much paper…
However, if we do ever move to the point these authors want I will happily extend to them the left hand of friendship.
Well, Gwyneth Paltrow (Shakespeare In Love, 1999 Oscar) did say that no one should ever use more than one square of toilet tissue for any use in the bathroom. Maybe she is on to something.
Of course, she wouldn’t dream of lying her, err, her, err, “arm” off about her personal usage! In my experience most people lie at some point about personal behaviour! Think of a visit to a doctor……………Oh no Doctor I barely drink the guvment recommended quantities of alcohol, let alone exceed them, or oh no doctor, I eat low fat low calorie everything except once a year at Christmas time when I indulge modestly, or, oh yes I exercise regularly running at least 5 miles a day 7 days a week at the age of 65, come rain or shine, (you get the picture)!
I wonder which grade of toilet paper she uses. Fine, Super Fine or Oops.
Gwyneth was very likely just referring to the consequences of certain dietary choices. Without going into details or benefits (if any), this makes indeed a lot of difference with regards to the need for toilet paper.
Forget toilet paper, wipe you a**e with a Green.
“The push for new toilet paper became more intense …”. Must be that someone ignored the sign that said “Would the last person to use the last piece of toilet paper please replace the roll.”
Back to Nature is what NRDC wants:
https://youtu.be/knotGyFZqcc
But the Green Blob (TM) is ‘OK’ with sacrificing old growth forests to replace coal as the primary fuel running Drax?
WTF is wrong with these people?
There’s the answer. Recycle used toilet paper and send it to Drax for disposal
BREAKING NEWS
CANADIAN TREES FOUND GUILTY OF CAUSING CLIMATE CHANGE. Trudeau in a tizzy. Carbon tax on toilet paper urgently needed to save the planet. Those close to the PMO say it will likely be a star feature in Liberals election manifesto. A source who does not wish to be identified whispered that a toilet roll ration coupon will be introduced as well as legislation outlawing excessive use of one use paper. Canadian households will be required to keep a log book of number of sheets used per visit.
(Privy News)
Here in Maine where we have had a paper industry for a century or more we know that the trees grown for pulp are of little use for anything else and they are harvested every 20 years. We also know that the difference between a forest and field of corn is simply frequency of harvest and that a young growing forest is a healthy forest. The only way to have that young healthy forest is to harvest it frequently. Our only gripe about the forest industry is getting behind a loaded logging truck on a road where there is little opportunity to pass. Maybe this a sexist thing. After all the ladies use twice as much paper.
David, you’re spot on!
And oh, so politically incorrect.
Coincidence?
I think not.
David,
I am surprised you feel the need to overtake a logging lorry? Earlier this year I was fortunate to be able to spend a couple of months in NZ. There the logging industry is full on. The logging lorries pulling a full logging trailer carry around 40 ton of timber, and travel at speeds that defy sanity. No one ever overtakes a logging lorry in NZ, unless they have an uphill section to protect them.
NB the width of NZ roads these trucks operate on, are barely wide enough for one lorry, let alone a passing car wanting to overtake.
One of the first rules of life of a husband is, never deny a woman a clean bathroom. Now, if I tell my wife (take it easy on the toilet paper), I might get castrated with a spoon.
There are forests getting planted today for the sole purpose of providing humanity with our future paper needs. I love trees. If we stop using paper altogether, those trees will stop being planted.
You did not know that before hand?
Eek, you must have had a steep learning curve.
Pro Tip:
It does not matter, the answer is “Yes, Dear”.
Pro tip for long marriage…
We agreed twenty years ago, I make all the big decisions, she makes all the day to day decisions. It has worked great, after 20 years I have not needed to make one decision.
Perhaps a belt sander would be more ‘sustainable’? You first, SJW’s @NRDC….
In Canada, the TrueDope government announces a ban on single use toilet paper.
Climate Barbie said, “no longer will it be only Newfie neighborhoods that have toilet paper hanging out to dry!”
I can’t resist.
The left has pooed the screwch on this one.
When my kids were babies (through about 2 years old), when they “messed themselves”, I just shoved them into the bathtub and washed them off. I saved a lot of toilet paper. (But I wasted a lot of water). However, the kids loved it, and they never got diaper rash.
According to the report, the average American goes thru 3 rolls of TP a week. Really? My wife and I between us probably use a roll about every 2 weeks, so one-twelfth of that. And it’s a cheapo brand, not Charmin, and single-ply. We are on a septic system, so are kind to the system. The tank gets pumped every 10 years. Never have any problems.
The reason to use toilet paper instead of one’s hand is to keep one’s hands as clean as possible, so that washing hands clean afterward can be done quickly and easily. The whole idea of using one square of tp after a bowel movement is ludicrous unless the movement is hard, dry, and compacted; which likely means that the donor is constipated to the point of bleeding during and afterwards. I do think a lot of people must use an unconscionable amount of tp per bm, which is wasteful (and may clog the toilet).
I also think the government has no business trespassing in my bathroom when I’m doing my business!
I see you are not familiar with socialism.
The report outs the makers of better quality paper as using ‘virgin’ pulp fiber instead of recycled. ‘Cause that’s how to make better paper.
The long rambling report about forest creatures, aboriginals, and logging does contain some disjointed facts, but not the fact that far more Canadian boreal forest is renewed by fire (6 million acres per year, once every 200 years) than logging (less than 2 million, once every 800 years).
So buy the good stuff if you can afford it, it’s better than watching it burn.
Tissue isn’t used in some cultures:
Google, “Islamic toilet etiquette” for an example
Sheryl Crow abdicates using one square per visit….https://www.theguardian.com/environment/2007/apr/23/musicnews.music
Sorry – advocates