Guest Post by Bob Tisdale
I recently ran across an article by Chelsea Harvey for BusinessInsider. It was the title that grabbed my attention: This Map Shows How Climate Change Will Screw The Whole World. Not just parts of the world, the “Whole World”. Wow. Interest piqued, I discovered she was referring to Figure 2.4 from the IPCC’s Climate Change 2014 Synthesis Report (longer report), shown below. It appears to be the same as Figure SPM.8 from the 2014 Synthesis Report Summary for Policymakers. The author described the map of future risks as a “handy chart”. I love handy charts.
The map resembles the planet Earth, where most of us reside. The continents are in the right places, and so are the oceans. But we know that’s not the Earth. The risks illustrated are based on climate models, and we know that climate models used by the IPCC for their reports are not based on Earth’s actual climate, as it has existed in the past, or as it exists now. The maps output by climate models may resemble our Earth, but they’re fantasy maps of a fantasy world. They create nothing more than an illusion…an illusion that is intended to make it look like bad things will happen in the future if we all do not agree to reduce our carbon footprints.
We need a name for the imaginary planet simulated by climate models—a planet that looks like Earth, but is not Earth. I’ll propose the climate-modeled planet be called TurnsToCrap. No matter how the modelers present the product of their endeavors, they show the planet TurnsToCrap.

Planet Algore
Manndora
The world as envisioned by the IPCC, Hansen and Mann should be called Hysteria
I saw that article, too. I wanted to comment, but there was no place for one.
Climatebabe Chelsea is just jumping on the bandwagon. She wants to be liked. Probably didn’t make the cut as a cheerleader in high school.
Anyway, I could have saved her a lot of typing: ‘The End Is Nigh.’ Simples.
Planet Dearth of Truth
Pachauri
Mannhansenlew
Their Own Little World
Crutopia?
!
Errorth
All it takes is reading the title to know that this is indeed the hard-science we should be basing world-wide economic policy and social engineering on. Once they start showing them complex graphs where them orange bars jump from medium to the next level of medium…man, my head just starts to spin. I willingly submit to you, climatologists, my meek and unworthy brain as penance. Save us! Make the scary-colored graphs turn a soothing icy blue!
Planet ocean
Planet GIGO.
+1 Fitting name
Yes!
I like Planet GIGO
How about Planet FAUXGEO
Or maybe
PLANISFEAR
THERMONDE
For describing someone missing a grey cell or billion I always use Planet Zod. It’s close to earth but far enough away for the lunies to live on.
Planet Mirth
Sim Earth?
Thermophobia
Cannabis
I like that.
Naming a planet GAGW after something which gives a distorted view of reality.
My new progressive bifocals give me more distortion than that ever did, i recall…
So all planets bear names of ancient world gods. So I’d say Dolos
http://www.theoi.com/Daimon/Dolos.html
Or maybe “Mendacium”? 🙂
lol, yes 🙂
lousy beggars… (grr)
IMO Gary refers to mendacity (from the Latin for untruthful) rather than mendicants (from the Latin for begging), but it works brilliantly both ways.
Yes, Mr. Harlani, I agree — your guess is the better one given the “a” vs. the “i.” Thanks for the affirmation… and the lesson.
That’s really a delightful one, but I’m afraid it requires an encyclopedia to be appreciated.
Got “Mendacium” it from leftturnandre’s reference for “Dolos”.
Planet Terrda.
Planet WTF-97
Good one. My choice
Planet X, Y or Z, depending on the excuse needed.
Along the lines of a computer game little kids like to play, SimCity (where the people all turn red when you forget to put enough elevators in your apartment buildings and stuff like that)
SimEarth
Ad slogan: “Not realistic, BUT tons of fun to play! Design fake buildings. Fool your friends — tell them you are a real engineer.”
Not recommended for children under the age of 3.
vegas – I haven’t seen that much risk of bad things happening since I visited a casino.
Markeyville