New Law Requires You To Listen To Greta Thunberg Lecture Before Purchasing Gasoline

Reposted with permission from The Babylon Bee


U.S.—A series of new bills working their way through state legislatures in New York, California, Oregon, Hawaii, and several other progressive states will require you to listen to a Greta Thunberg lecture before purchasing gasoline.

Motorists will be required to watch a 20-minute lecture by the 16-year-old climate activist before they purchase gallons and gallons of harmful fossil fuels.

“We want to make sure drivers are informed,” said California Governor Gavin Newsom, who says he will sign the bill into law. “So we are having them get lectured by a 16-year-old so they will have all the facts before they do something rash like put gasoline in their cars to go to work.”

Once the driver has listened to Thunberg’s entire lecture, they will be prompted to complete a quick, fifteen-question quiz to show they understand how horrible they are for driving a car. Drivers who get at least 80% will then be allowed to refuel their vehicles. As they refuel, the screen will simply play a clip of Thunberg saying, “How dare you!” over and over again.

The law will not apply to celebrities purchasing jet fuel.

0 0 votes
Article Rating
Newest Most Voted
Inline Feedbacks
View all comments
Mark Broderick
October 8, 2019 10:03 am


Reply to  Mark Broderick
October 9, 2019 7:36 am

That’s what I thought, but then…..

sir padre
Reply to  beng135
October 9, 2019 10:57 am

Aren’t they playing her UN talk at Planned Parenthood to prospective clients to show why abortion is SO important to those NOT wishing to raise a damaged child?

On a side note; Why doesn’t “my body, my choice” apply to suicides?

Reply to  sir padre
October 9, 2019 10:44 pm

Why can’t women watch a video before an abortion?

Dan Houck
Reply to  beng135
October 10, 2019 7:50 pm

Just to put this out there – since many comments don’t seem to know: The Babylon Bee is a satirical website. It is quite funny… like The Onion used to be.

John A Hemmerich
Reply to  Dan Houck
October 12, 2019 8:07 am

so it’s all fake? Wow people spend money on fake stuff. If it’s true, there will be lines and lines of vehicles waiting to purchase gas, especially in winter time PLUS what about those people who are deaf? And those who speak foreign languages? How dare you, Greta, leaving out other races.

John Minich
Reply to  Dan Houck
October 18, 2019 2:07 pm

Dan Houck: I was definitely fooled. I live in California and I am so used to gross absurdity from these state and local (loco?) governments, that I thought that this was just another absurdity that passes for law and government in this state. I guess I can get used to any absurdity out here. Though living with it is pretty hard. Can anyone remind me what the definitions of sensible and sane are?

James Bull
Reply to  Mark Broderick
October 9, 2019 7:39 am

I think that about sums it up.

James Bull

Big T
Reply to  Mark Broderick
October 9, 2019 2:18 pm

A lot of those little screens will be getting smashed at gas stations.

Reply to  Big T
October 9, 2019 3:16 pm

Better yet – move out of state. When an insane Governor does this to his constituents — that’s when you leave. You have choices – make them, and make them count. When Newsom, the Idiot realizes all he has in his state are the homeless and illegals – he will know he did something wrong.

No name
Reply to  Big T
October 10, 2019 7:18 am

Let’s let all the immature spoiled brats run our lives. What about our galaxy being destroyed in 4 billion years. Shame on God.

Reply to  No name
October 10, 2019 7:38 am

Not destroyed, just combined into a new galaxy (Milkomeda? The Andromeda Way?). Inevitable as almost all galaxies other than the most isolated will combine eventually.

October 8, 2019 10:04 am

That may be a good thing. It could get more of these idiots voted out than most of their stupid spending.

Joel Snider
Reply to  OldRetiredGuy
October 8, 2019 11:11 am

Well, in California, they’re talking about turning off northern California’s power for a week – to prevent forest fires.

Think this will turn California into a red state?

Or have residents been sufficiently cowed/indoctrinated to just take it as ‘the new normal’?

My humble opinion, the legislatures of all three coast states need a nice unruly mob wielding pitchforks.

Reply to  Joel Snider
October 8, 2019 12:48 pm

turning off northern California’s power for a week – to prevent forest fires?

Certainly makes more sense than proper installation and maintenance of power lines.

Joel Snider
Reply to  Greg
October 8, 2019 2:15 pm

But it DOES punish the populace for using electricity – homes, businesses, hospitals – I wonder if they can match the body count of last year’s forest fires.

A little preview of things to come.

I shake my head at people who tell me ‘they’ll never do THAT’.
Trust me they WILL – the very second they can.

Reply to  Joel Snider
October 8, 2019 4:52 pm

Joel- arbitrarily cutting off electricity in northern CA will cause hundreds of deaths. Hospitals probably have emergency power, but the rest of the folks will suffer without heat and/or air conditioning. The phone system will go out. People won’t be able to pump gas. Not traffic lights. etc. all will cause many tragic deaths plus inumerable colds, flu, and other threatening conditions that won’t get treated promptly, if at all.

Reply to  Joel Snider
October 8, 2019 5:11 pm

@Philo – What’s your point? That this idea is too radical even foor radical watermelons? Too stupid even for raaabid warmists?

John Endicott
Reply to  Joel Snider
October 9, 2019 7:48 am

Joel any body count is a feature not a bug – at least for the Malthusian watermelons.

Reply to  Joel Snider
October 9, 2019 12:58 pm

Joel says:
A little preview of things to come.

It’s been said CA is the “socialist experiment”, at least in the US. I wonder how that’s going…..

Terry Shipman
Reply to  Greg
October 8, 2019 3:40 pm

Perhaps if California would allow the power companies to properly trim brush around the power lines there would be fewer fires.

Reply to  Terry Shipman
October 9, 2019 4:39 am

leaving itlate to do so?
should be done in winter or autumn surely
our local enviro mobs are starting the controlled burns now
and home n famers are doing the same

Donald Schmitt
Reply to  Terry Shipman
October 9, 2019 5:13 am

CALFIRE used to have “Redbooks” on line that listed number of wildfires by cause. When I looked for them yesterday they were gone. Found a post on another Forum where I linked to the. In that post I said that 10% were caused by power facilities.this was consistant year to wear.

It is only in the last couple years that there have been devastating fires traced to power facilities. I agree a lit of the problem is reduced tree trimming and also failure to remove undergrowth, dead/dying trees and timing the forest.

My best friend lived in Paradise and I visited him often. A major problem in the Town was no Defendable Space as recommended by CALFIRE cleared around many of the buildings

jo blo
Reply to  Greg
October 8, 2019 4:11 pm

More like, to prevent another huge lawsuit sticking the power company with the bill for fire suppression. Makes more sense than proper thinning / clear-cutting to reduce fire hazards?

lawsuit -> power shut offs -> power customers installing back-up generators -> transporting and storing many more cans of gasoline, some generators will be installed haphazardly -> increased fire risk, but at least the (D)irtbag party’s lawyer contingent will be able to sue more people into penury over it.

Reply to  Joel Snider
October 8, 2019 12:55 pm

It is going to have to get a lot worse in CA before it gets better.

The first movement is that people who could vote for free enterprise, low taxes, and limited regulation are leaving the state in droves for friendlier climes. The leftists are then left behind, but in increasing majorities, for the time being. They will go all out for leftist government.

The second movement will have to await the ordinary people realising how terrible things are getting under the typical leftist governing that is going on. That is going to take time….like the people behind the iron wall, even the political leaders, realising that communism is a hopeless disaster. It took decades of government depravity. Then the wall fell.

Reply to  kwinterkorn
October 8, 2019 1:43 pm

I’m afraid all that’s going to be left will be the people that can’t afford to move….

Reply to  kwinterkorn
October 8, 2019 2:37 pm

And they are all going to move here to Reno, where we live – great.

Reply to  Stephan
October 9, 2019 9:25 am

It’s only a matter of time before other states start taxing Californians who move there. In Texas they are considered a plague that is changing the fundamental values of the state.

Reply to  Joel Snider
October 8, 2019 1:31 pm

The districts don’t need power, only the major cities with the political power. Mockingjay 3 movie line.

Reply to  Joel Snider
October 8, 2019 2:18 pm

So, to prevent fires they’re forcing people to cook on outdoor grills and use portable generators or candles for lighting? Makes sense to me!!

Reply to  Joel Snider
October 8, 2019 3:43 pm

Methinks it will cause significant vandalism of gas pumps.
Twenty minutes of video,
Followed by a fifteen question test.
Failure to pass means another twenty minutes of gretaisms.

It’s very likely that the states will be sued for stealing valuable time without fair market recompense.

Reply to  ATheoK
October 8, 2019 10:31 pm

The Babylon Bee (the source of this story) is a satire website. The story is satire, not real.

Reply to  MonnaM
October 9, 2019 3:57 am

Satire is now indistinguishable from reality in California today.

Reply to  MonnaM
October 9, 2019 4:42 am

hey if its about cali then its hard to tell tween truth n satire, theyre rather close there;-0

John Endicott
Reply to  MonnaM
October 9, 2019 7:33 am

That because Cali long ago fell victim to a parody inversion point

Kelvin Duncan
Reply to  MonnaM
October 10, 2019 2:49 pm

Whew. Thank God for that. But the problem is that it could have been real!

John Endicott
Reply to  Joel Snider
October 9, 2019 7:46 am

Well, in California, they’re talking about turning off northern California’s power for a week – to prevent forest fires.

Yeah like that’s not asking for trouble. Numerous residents turning to individual generators, outdoor fire (grills), and indoor fire (candles) to provide power, cooking, and light. there’s never been an accident with any of those things. I wonder if the media will report on the deaths and (their connection to lack of power) from people who die from inhaling the smoke from generators that were used too close to their dwelling, from fires started by a simple candle falling over, or those without their own private generators (or sufficient fuel to run them) who die as a result of the heat (no power = no AC), etc.

Brandon Sheffield
Reply to  OldRetiredGuy
October 8, 2019 11:37 am

So in other words “your’e fired” will be heard across the state, as millions will be at least 20mins late for work.
Boss: Why you late?
20 employees : cause I was getting gas.

Reply to  Brandon Sheffield
October 8, 2019 3:45 pm

Don’t overlook the minor fact that the twenty minutes is sequenced.

Get there after fifty other drivers have endured the twenty minute videos and the waiting line will be long and very hot.

Charles Higley
Reply to  OldRetiredGuy
October 8, 2019 12:14 pm

So, what will be the subsidies paid to the gas station owners for the incredible slow down in their sales? Taxes are going to be involved from the state or the cost of gas will go up a lot to make up for the lost revenue rate. This would cost the public big time for just a little liberal politician virtue signaling.

Reply to  OldRetiredGuy
October 8, 2019 12:38 pm

If this law is for real and gets passed, I suspect there will be a burgeoning business sector for black market petrol.


Jeff Alberts
Reply to  Roger Surf
October 8, 2019 7:55 pm

“If this law is for real…”

Your satire detector is seriously broken.

Reply to  Jeff Alberts
October 8, 2019 9:44 pm

These days the left are going insane so fast that satire can barely keep up. Plenty of leftists are probably calling their representatives to ask them to support this law.

Reply to  Jeff Alberts
October 9, 2019 7:31 am

True, but try to imagine how the Babylon Bee could possibly satirize the current gender situation. How many are there now? Facebook got up to over 70 before settling on male, female, and custom, or so I’m told. Maybe I was reading satire, maybe not? Who can tell with the left anymore.

John Endicott
Reply to  Rod
October 9, 2019 8:04 am

Indeed, some real life ideas (gender, as you point out, is an excellent example) are so far out there that satire pales in comparison – to the point that it isn’t always easy yo tell the two apart.

Paul R. Johnson
Reply to  Jeff Alberts
October 9, 2019 6:59 pm

The fact that it’s satire may not stop Snopes from “fact checking” the Bee, as they have in the past.

Reply to  OldRetiredGuy
October 8, 2019 2:53 pm

I finally realised this is a satirical website apologies for not getting the joke earlier

Reply to  OldRetiredGuy
October 9, 2019 12:19 am

Is this a fall version of April Fool’s Day?

Matthew Sykes
Reply to  OldRetiredGuy
October 9, 2019 1:43 am

It is already having that effect.

Terry Harvey
October 8, 2019 10:06 am

No more ridiculous than some of what goes on.

Gary Pearse
Reply to  Terry Harvey
October 8, 2019 11:56 am

Gee Terry, don’t be too compliant. Trust me, this is outrageous.

Non Nomen
October 8, 2019 10:07 am

Fools day special. High probability, though.

Ian Magness
October 8, 2019 10:10 am

“The law will not apply to celebrities purchasing jet fuel.”
– or British royalty shipping a fleet of diesel-guzzling 4x4s all the way from Britain to South Africa (and, presumably, back again) so that they and their many staff can feel a little more at home;
– or European Extinction Rebellion protesters using diesel generators to heat their tents and food etc;
– or…
WUWT readers can fill in the rest.

Reply to  Ian Magness
October 8, 2019 12:50 pm

Or British royalty flying out to visit convicted sex offenders on their secret island get-away.

Strange, we don’t seem to hear much about that any more.

Reply to  Greg
October 8, 2019 5:04 pm

It worked out so well that someone should get an unsolicited bonus to go along with their standard fee.

Mark A Luhman
Reply to  Greg
October 8, 2019 11:52 pm

Was it nice the pimp committed suicide, while the video cameras did not work and the guards slept.

Reply to  Mark A Luhman
October 9, 2019 3:52 am

Or a helluva a coincidence all of those things happened concurrently. Color me skeptical.

These guys are getting more and more brazen and bold in their actions

Reply to  Mark A Luhman
October 9, 2019 4:44 am

yeah how VERY convenient.
and there are bits re andrew and his sleazy mate running in Aussie papers if you wanted to be bothered.

Reply to  Mark A Luhman
October 9, 2019 11:57 am

You misspelled Arkancide.

Reply to  Ian Magness
October 8, 2019 5:11 pm

Celebrities flying sailing crews back to home in Scandinavia.
Celebrities building and fueling their plastic yachts
Green peace flying their hot air balloon. Hope the link works. Great dripping irony.

Reply to  Mark
October 8, 2019 10:50 pm

Mark …Initially I was going to ask if you or anyone knew where Miss Thunberg’s promo tour currently be…So I decided to check myself and…

Greta Thunberg Heads to Standing Rock to Support Indigenous Activists.
Yessenia Funes..Yesterday 11:45am…Gizmodo…Environmental Justice..

For indigenous environmental activist Tokata Iron Eyes, climate solutions are all about indigenous rights and culture.
When Iron Eyes met Swedish teen activist Greta Thunberg a couple of weeks ago and realized Thunberg felt the same way, she invited Thunberg to her ancestral homelands….
Thunberg will be speaking on another panel Tuesday at Standing Rock in North Dakota, the site of a seminal 2016 protest over the Dakota Access Pipeline….

Iron Eyes was speaking out about environmental injustices long before Standing Rock, telling the crowd at Pine Ridge on Sunday that she spoke out about uranium mining at age 9…

I wonder if anyone will point out at this anti oil meeting that Sweden powers its electric with 40% of Hydro and 40% of …Nuclear…and that Miss Thunberg might be better off staying home and demanding Sweden go all Solar and wind to replace that Nuclear powered electricity…As If it could be replaced without massive expense and electricity shutdowns…

One letter to this site noted that…it was probably a good choice for Ms Thunberg to visit the Standing Rock Sioux – say instead of the Three Affiliated Tribes (Mandan, Hidatsa , and Arikara) of the Fort Berthold Reservation located up pipeline. Fort Berthold wells are producing over 300,000 barrels of oil per day (plus associated gas). It’s pretty much the sweet spot of the Bakken….

… The conversation would have been different for Ms Thunberg, where the Three Affiliated Tribes are making truckloads of money off the Bakken oil and gas and the Standing Rock Sioux aren’t. …Sadly, SR Sioux can’t even collect severance on the oil flowing through the pipeline, since it’s not on their land….

Mark…I was also going to ask if Miss Thunberg and her committee of wranglers have come up with another PR stunt and marketing ploy…like the fossil fuel hydrocarbon elite racing yacht…as to getting her and the Posse back to all that cheap affordable nuclear made electricity…

Note….In checking for sources I came across an article that was scathing regarding wind power from a most unlikely source…I am not sure if they realised just how damning this article is about wind and Sweden transferring away from Nuke…Vox…Jun 17, 2016,..Sweden decides it’s not so easy to give up nuclear power…

…That looming shutdown posed a dilemma. Many greens wanted to keep the nuclear tax, phase out Sweden’s nuclear fleet, and replace that power with wind and solar. But this was looking quite challenging to pull off in practice.

One key difficulty is that nuclear power plants run around the clock, whereas wind power is much more variable (operating at capacity around 30 percent of the time). One peer-reviewed study found that to replace 9,000 megawatts of nuclear capacity, Sweden would have to build more than 22,000 megawatts of wind capacity, plus about 8,600 megawatts’ worth of gas turbines for backup power. By some estimates, building that much wind and gas would cost twice as much as simply keeping the existing reactors open for their remaining life spans.

…There’s also the question of what to do during Sweden’s winter, when electricity demand for heating soars but wind turbines often shut down due to extreme cold (and solar output drops sharply).

A 2015 study in Energy Policy found that a premature shutdown would raise Sweden’s system costs “disproportionately.” Another study in The European Physical Journal Plus found that replacing the entire nuclear fleet with wind and gas would cause Sweden’s electricity CO2 emissions to double. Swedish industry groups — heavy electricity users like Volvo or steelmaker SSAB — lobbied to save the reactors….

Reply to  RobbertBobbert
October 9, 2019 4:50 am

The Danes had better be praying that the Swedes change their minds on shutting down their nuclear plants since Swedish electricity exports form the baseload for Denmark’s grid (with Norway’s hydro acting as the peaking plants). That is what is keeping the Danish windfarm based grid from daily collapse

Carl Friis-Hansen
Reply to  RobbertBobbert
October 9, 2019 5:02 am

In July 2019 EON increase the fixed connection fee significantly. EON explain that this has been necessary as we are expanding and strengthening the grid to accommodate future increase in number and size of wind turbines and the thinner grid also needs strengthening to provide for more household PV solar panels.

Bryan A
October 8, 2019 10:17 am

BUT BUT BUT It Ain’t April Fools Day

Reply to  Bryan A
October 8, 2019 1:28 pm

Nah, it’s the Babylon Bee. A very funny parody site that has a right of center viewpoint.

The problem with the parody business these days is the leftists are making it too difficult. How do you make parody when all these outrageous things are really happening?

October 8, 2019 10:18 am

Please, dont give them any ideas!

Reply to  Ack
October 8, 2019 2:10 pm

I can see it now. A virtual assistant for the home named Greta (like Alexa and Siri).

Working guy: “Greta, book me the cheapest flight to Cancun for my upcoming vacation.”
Greta: “How dare you!”

Dad: “Greta, order a half dozen steaks with overnight shipping from Amazon Fresh.”
Greta: “How dare you!”

Mom: “Greta, what are the best soccer uniforms to get for the children?”
Greta: “You’ve stolen my childhood!”

Reply to  icisil
October 8, 2019 6:18 pm

^^^^ bingo! We have a winner!

October 8, 2019 10:21 am

I thought this might be fake news, but I noticed it was only California and New York, so it seems plausible.

Reply to  astonerii
October 8, 2019 12:28 pm

I just wish this were fake news, I think this is the future of the EU. Minus Britain, of course.

John Endicott
Reply to  Hugs
October 9, 2019 7:55 am

Only if Britain’s leadership can ever get the country across the Brexit finish line (hopefully Boris will get it done). Otherwise they’ll still be in the EU quagmire.

Jim Sweet
October 8, 2019 10:26 am

Rash of Suicides at Gas Stations Linked to Climate Change

Pete Lefeet
Reply to  Jim Sweet
October 9, 2019 11:19 am

You mean mass shootings on gas lines

Reply to  Jim Sweet
October 9, 2019 5:25 pm

The rash of suicides resulted from having to watch Gretta Thunberg’s inane video message on climate change.

October 8, 2019 10:29 am

There’s a line from the great Adam Sandler movie, That’s My Boy, that sums this up perfectly…

(Warning: F-Bomb)

That is just ****ing mental.

Roy Hammond
October 8, 2019 10:31 am

I hope you guys realize that the Bee prints only parody type fake stories.

October 8, 2019 10:31 am

I know that is a parody, but the sad thing is that it doesn’t seem that far fetched. I would not be surprised if they don’t start putting pictures of Greta up at gas stations.

Reply to  Alan
October 8, 2019 1:00 pm

We’ve reached the Parody Inversion Point:

Paul Penrose
Reply to  Ralph Dave Westfall
October 8, 2019 2:06 pm

Beat me to it!

Mumbles McGuirck
Reply to  Alan
October 8, 2019 1:32 pm

My fav was the Orcs showing up at an AOC town hall asking if they could eat hobbits.
Just like the plant who showed up at AOC town hall saying we’re going to have to eat children because “climate change”. Hee hee

Nicholas Harding
October 8, 2019 10:32 am

I always look to 16 year olds for expert opinion. Having trouble finding a 16 year old MD to advise me. Why is Greta not being played in eating establishments if I order beef? Or pork? Or bison? (Good thing many of those were killed off before 1880; the methane problem must have been out of hand before that time.)

Reply to  Nicholas Harding
October 8, 2019 11:41 am

our neighbor’s kid is about 16…he wants a Maserati

Reply to  Latitude
October 8, 2019 1:40 pm

license plate number “DOES185” ?

AGW is not Science
Reply to  OweninGA
October 9, 2019 12:13 pm

That would fit better than “I lost my license, now I don’t drive.” LOL

October 8, 2019 10:35 am

The real question is, how far is this from a plausible reaction, especially from the loons in office on the West Coast?

As usually, the Bee twists just far enough into the looneysphere to make it not much of a stretch to be true.

October 8, 2019 10:36 am

Heads-up to readers thinking of stocking up on gas before the bill comes into effect, as I’ve just finished doing (doncha love loyalty points?):

This is from Babylon Bee, a site previously stung (HAHAHA) by adverse findings into its, shall we say, tolerance for misinformation.

If you needed to volltank anyway—do you have this verb in England?—then go ahead, but otherwise wait to see if more trusted news agencies collaborate this.

The problem with misinformation these days is that it is more and more plausible. Just because this sounds like the kind of thing that happens every day, doesn’t prove anything in and of itself. The liars-for-hire industry has learned from tobacco-playbook research that people aren’t falling for big lies anymore, so they increasingly put out stories that are 95% or even completely true to bypass your cognitive perimeter alarm.

Reply to  Brad Keyes
October 8, 2019 10:48 am

Oh, no, Brad Keyes! I won’t wait more than a minor split second to spread the Gospel of Greta At the Pump, as it is imperative that all we mere mortals be informed of our fate to come. This is news that should be spread far and wide, to prepare ye the Way of the Word of Greta At the Pump!!!! (sarc off)

Thank you, mods. I will pass this on. I know people who love this kind of stuff!

Reply to  Sara
October 8, 2019 11:43 am

You forgot to open your sarc tags, Sara. I assume the content of your toxically masculine, Gretaphobic argument is as unbalanced as your HTML so I will not bother reading and fisking it point by point unless petitioned earnestly, as I’m sure others will do a good job of that.

I’m getting a bit sick of Greta, who is 16, being used to score climate-wars points. Shame on the denihilist movement for crossing what I think is a bright, statutory line. Leave her alone. She just wants a childhood, to date boys, to go to school, and all the normal things. The right’s weaponizing of her has stolen all that forever. How dare you? And in a broader sense, how dare anyone? Who dares wins?

I don’t pretend to have all the answers, but what I do have are the right ones, and I won’t be silenced.

Reply to  Brad Keyes
October 8, 2019 12:27 pm

God, you are pathetic.

mike the morlock
Reply to  Brad Keyes
October 8, 2019 12:34 pm

Brad Keyes October 8, 2019 at 11:43 am
Hi Brad. I hope it is a joke, but there can be logic and method in insanity.

Can we say gas lines? The 20 minute wait does not just effect the person at the pump but the next one after and after that.
People point out that it takes only a few moments to gas up but an EV can take at least 20 minutes.
Maybe they think that by lengthening the fill up time they are leveling the playing field, thus making EVs more attractive.
Now if they let us pick what we wanted to watch…


Reply to  Brad Keyes
October 8, 2019 1:30 pm

Normally, Brad, I would tell you to stuff it, but you have zero ability to detect when someone is serious and is NOT serious. That is YOUR failing, tootsie, and no one else’s.

IF I send you a dollar, will that be enough for you to buy yourself a sense of humor?

Reply to  Sara
October 8, 2019 3:14 pm

If you mail me twenty dollars and a SASE I will show you how to get people to send you money in the mail.

Reply to  Brad Keyes
October 8, 2019 1:35 pm

Brad, if you think Greta is being abused (as I do), take it up with her parents and handlers, who are the ones responsible for her misguided anger at the world in general.

Poor kid.

Joel Snider
Reply to  Brad Keyes
October 8, 2019 2:22 pm

I guess the reason you progressive snowflake types always attach the word ‘phobic’ to everything, is just more projection – how much damage is done to pandering to your type of paranoia.

So – you won’t be silenced because you have the right answers – except for the ones you don’t.

Funny that you support those who would silence everybody else.

By the way – Greta was weaponized by the left – her parents – and all you activists – nothing’s been ‘stolen’ from her – she’s been made into a celebrity – and here you are, demanding that we bow to your human shield – who by the way, has clearly been groomed for full exploitation.

Nice trick with nihilist – denier quip – more projection, as you seem to be both.

Jeff Alberts
Reply to  Brad Keyes
October 8, 2019 10:13 pm

Brad thinks he’s really clever, but is really just stringing you all along. Just ignore him.

Reply to  Jeff Alberts
October 9, 2019 10:30 am

I was originally thinking of congratulating Joel above with the “ABNC” (i.e., the “Almost But No Cigar”) Award for his take here (emphasis added):

Nice trick with nihilist – denier quip – more projection, as you seem to be both.


But I’m glad I waited, because instead I have to thank you, Jeff, for using your own special brand of Keyes to open the door to our understanding of Brad:

Brad thinks he’s really clever, but is really just stringing you all along.

I really couldn’t have imagined a better example of how one could lead the ilks of we than yours. You’ve done everyone (or maybe just me) a really great service by propitiously opining that really Brad believes himself “really clever,” when in reality the cunning cleverness of the skilled marionettist is really just the stuff of addlepates, never mind that for those who have eyes to see (like you and me, really), but also for those who don’t, all the makings of the cake are right there on the table.

Nicholas McGinley
Reply to  Jeff Alberts
October 9, 2019 10:46 pm

I think maybe Jeff just had his punctuation autocorrected.
It meant to say:
Brad thinks. He’s really clever, but is, really.
Just stringing you all along.
That last part about ignoring him was obvious gallimaufry from an expert in raillery.
You know, a schtick up!
*wink wink nudge*

Nicholas McGinley
Reply to  Brad Keyes
October 9, 2019 10:07 pm

*sits back and laughs*
Brad, this is just like the good old days, whenever they were.
Maybe they were not the good old days until things got even worse.

Maybe you need to serve up a trigger warming prior to your shotgun blasts of pasticcio and pasquinade.
Or maybe limit yourself to squibs of lampoon between fusillades of burlesque and outbursts of chiack.

michael hart
Reply to  Brad Keyes
October 8, 2019 11:01 am

Not heard of volltank Brad, but it’s not unknown for people to get tanked up, in the pub.

Reply to  michael hart
October 8, 2019 12:06 pm

Go to 0.36 in this programme:

Reply to  Brad Keyes
October 8, 2019 11:54 am

When did exquisite satire morph into ‘misinformation’? I mus have been asleep.

Bryan A
Reply to  JMichna
October 8, 2019 12:22 pm

It’s all biting satire until some misinformed individual thinks it’s misinformation

John Endicott
Reply to  Brad Keyes
October 9, 2019 8:11 am

Brad the Babylon Bee is a satire site, as such it can’t have a “tolerance for misinformation” as information/misinformation isn’t it’s purpose and has nothing to do with what the Bee does . If you thought it was anything else, it is you who is sadly misinformed.

Reply to  John Endicott
October 9, 2019 12:45 pm

Well heck . . . it seems the old adage, omne trium perfectum really is true after all. I thought I’d seen the best of the “J’s” in binary, when behold, again something fantocinni this way comes. In my considered opinion (and by my own admission I’ve carefully considered it) you fellas (i.e., “John,” “Joel,” and “Jeff”) are the best triple header warm-down for this Keyesian apostolic act.

What I’m saying is that you, John, as the third Jusketeer, are to be heartily commended for your judicious adjudication of Brad’s glaring error in proposing that the Bee has a “. . . shall we say . . . tolerance for misinformation.” I mean, who in their Right mind could ever propose that parody, satire, irony and such as this could be equated to “misinformation,” in the sense of “missing information,” or, “useless information,” or for that matter, in any truly informational sense whatsoever? Who I say?

Why certainly not the ilks of we!

Brad, therefore, in his infinitely fixed, cognitive perimeter alarmism will no doubt be weeping and gnashing his choppers if he ever truly geddsit. I hope he does. I know you do too. The pain of Truth fades to the beauty of it soon enough.

Thank you for trying to help these poor souls along.

Jeff Alberts
Reply to  sycomputing
October 9, 2019 7:43 pm

You’re really trying too hard. Tiresome.

Nicholas McGinley
Reply to  Jeff Alberts
October 9, 2019 10:20 pm

But maybe it serves as a counterpoint to the rest of us who rarely try hard enough.
Maybe if we all yank the chain of the marionette operator a bit harder than he has already yanked on ours, he may someday geddsit.
But what do I know, I am trying way to hard already.
Someday perhaps I can grow a sarcasm bone, but until then, I will just try to avoid breaking a leg, or a funny bone.

Reply to  Jeff Alberts
October 10, 2019 7:56 am

Hi Jeff:

I think you meant to say:

“You’re really trying too hard. [Really] tiresome.”

Moreover, I really think you should have more love for your brother Woke’eans. I mean really. You need to take a lesson from brother Nicholas. He actually practices his Woke’ianity.

You don’t. Not really.

Nicholas McGinley
Reply to  Jeff Alberts
October 11, 2019 1:37 pm

“You need to take a lesson from brother Nicholas. He actually practices his Woke’ianity. ”

I am gonna need a LOT of practice if I hope to ever get that that one right.

October 8, 2019 10:37 am

I don’t believe this story.

Reply to  Marty
October 8, 2019 12:32 pm

I remember the gas lines in the 1970s that went blocks from the pumps.

I’m wondering how long the lines will be after the 20 minute lecture. Maybe 20 seconds. Or maybe a put on.

Reply to  cerescokid
October 8, 2019 5:51 pm

The lines won’t be nearly as bad as waiting on forty-minute battery re-charging.

October 8, 2019 10:40 am

You got me! I swallowed it hook, line, and sinker.

The problem is that this is not much stupider than reality.

Reply to  Ken
October 8, 2019 1:36 pm

I could say “ditto”, but I’ve been pranked by things like this before and when it got to the 20 minutes to wait to put gas in the tank, my first thought was ‘someone will hack that in five seconds, so….Pffffttt! Has to to be a joke.”

I was right. And it is done well enough to not seem to be a joke. Best one this week.

Carlie Coats
October 8, 2019 10:41 am

The First Amendment implies a right not to listen. See

Freedom Not to Listen:A Constitutional Analysis of Compulsory Indoctrination ThroughWorkplace Captive Audience Meetings by Roger C. Hartley, Professor of Law, The Catholic University of Americ

Reply to  Carlie Coats
October 8, 2019 5:58 pm

You have the right not to listen, but no rights attach to buying gasoline. Governments can decide who may buy gasoline, and the requirements to do so. You are not a ‘captured audience’, particuly since gasoline is not a necessity (technically).

Reply to  jtom
October 8, 2019 8:05 pm

Back in the 20’s, they had to pass a constitutional amendment to allow the government to ban sales of alcohol.
Now days we are so much more enlightened. We have decided that the government can decide what you may or may not purchase merely by passing a law.
When they get real efficient, they don’t even bother passing a law, they just get some bureaucrat to pass a new regulation making the sale they disapprove of illegal.

John Q Public
October 8, 2019 10:43 am

I think they should have to listen to a lecture by Bruce/Caitlan Jenner before entering a unisex bathroom; animals screaming followed by a PETA lecture before buying a hamburger; etc.

October 8, 2019 10:44 am

This will be tried way before many of us have stopped laughing.

October 8, 2019 11:00 am

What a fascinating way to make the time it takes to refuel your ICE vehicle roughly the same as it takes to recharge an EV to, say, 80%.

Reply to  SMC
October 8, 2019 11:44 am



Reply to  SMC
October 8, 2019 12:46 pm

That’s the progressive way. Fairness is to make it suck for everyone equally, except for the elite of course.

October 8, 2019 11:03 am

And companies (political donors) will pay huge sums for virtue signaling ad placements during and after the lecture. The climate media consultants (political advisers) will also want to be in on the design and promotion. And Google and Facebook will shame those who bought fuels thereafter and wherever they go and whoever they meet or apply for jobs with. It’s the Pepsi Generation marketing with enforcement tools.

October 8, 2019 11:08 am

Do check the surveillance camera placements before using the 20 lb hammer on the screen.

Gerry, England
Reply to  ResourceGuy
October 8, 2019 12:47 pm

Good point. The shotgun will take care of them!

Reply to  ResourceGuy
October 8, 2019 3:46 pm

good advice for sure

Joel Snider
October 8, 2019 11:09 am

Boy – they’re pushing their human shields right in our face.

Funny thing, here in Oregon, we’re not allowed to pump our own gas. So I imagine the gas station workers will get pretty tired of the latest example of the new wave of Children of the Corn, Hitler youth.

Reply to  Joel Snider
October 8, 2019 11:53 am


Mike Smith
Reply to  Joel Snider
October 8, 2019 11:55 am

I discovered that while visiting Oregon this summer. Watts up with that?

Joel Snider
Reply to  Mike Smith
October 8, 2019 12:07 pm

Doesn’t it suck? I used to travel for a living – going back to my home state and having to wait on the attendant was a real drag.

Reply to  Joel Snider
October 8, 2019 5:18 pm

Except for the Casino pumps.

Last weekend, after half of my 600 mile loop I pull into the Chiloquin station and sit there for about 5 minutes, waiting patiently, before I realize I am not in Oregon anymore.

(make a note … reservation gas is cheapest … fill up there)

Reply to  Mike Smith
October 8, 2019 1:03 pm

NJ and Oregon are the only two states that don’t allow you to pump your own gas. While it can cause some delay waiting for the attendant, it also means no gasoline smell on your hands and is VERY nice in bad weather.

Mumbles McGuirck
Reply to  BobM
October 8, 2019 1:40 pm

having to wait on the attendant was a real drag.

In California, the gas attendants MUST be in drag.

Greg Cavanagh
Reply to  Mumbles McGuirck
October 8, 2019 5:13 pm

They don’t have a choice, there are no “normals” left.

Reply to  BobM
October 9, 2019 6:28 am

Freedom to choose is also VERY NICE even in bad weather.

Nicholas McGinley
Reply to  ResourceGuy
October 9, 2019 10:36 pm

There is no such thing as bad weather, only bad clothes.
– Ancient Norwegian Folk Wisdom

Nicholas McGinley
Reply to  BobM
October 9, 2019 10:31 pm

I have never got gas on my hands while pumping.
In fact, it was not until the government mandated fix of the not broken gas can that is became a reality for me.
Alas, I grew up across the river from Joisey, so not only learned the complex procedure for grabbing a thingy and putting in in a hole without spilling any you-know-what on my you-know-where, but found that with the money the gas stations saved by not having to hire someone to stand there doing something any fool can easily do for themselves, they bought these roof overhead dealios and put ’em over the pumps!
But I always was a little capitalist in training, even before growing up to hate dumb roolz and dictats.

Reply to  Joel Snider
October 8, 2019 1:05 pm

And yet the gas in Oregon is significantly cheaper than gas in California we pump ourselves (unless you pay about an additional $0.50 per gallon for full service). We pay a steep price for our inept leadership, and the cost of gas is just a small part of it. It’s not just Californian’s that suffers from our incompetent leaders, as the ineptness of Pelosi and Shiff affects the whole country.

October 8, 2019 11:11 am

Support for Greta Thunberg is evidence of “white supremacy”, “white privilege” and “white power”, activists claim.

The 16-year-old environmental campaigner has gained international visibility for her climate activism, including a fiery speech to world leaders at the United Nations General Assembly where she accused them of stealing her dreams.

However some are questioning however why Greta, a white child, is gaining so much attention over indigenous activists. They say that Greta is benefiting from a “global system of white supremacy” which has given her “privilege and a platform”.

Reply to  Neo
October 8, 2019 12:54 pm

Indeed indigenous Hispanic differently-legal queer Asian unablebodied Romani Shiits are underrepresented and marginalized by the patriarchy led by Mr Thunberg. As an indigenous marginalized minority non-gendered low vision impaired hearing English as a second language speaker and culturally minority non-American Christian I find this very disturbing, and require Mr Thunberg stops calling himself ‘han själv’ as that denies my right to exist as a non-Viking and brutally excludes my Eastern Province identity. Greta does not have the right to represent until Mr Thunberg has apologized for his existence, has been deplatformed and demonized. Yeah.

Gary Pearse
Reply to  Neo
October 8, 2019 12:57 pm

Actually most activists are white, middle-upper class lefties, mostly women and (I’m not sure why) a little heavier than average. White “progressives” invented almost all the genders and the diversity klatch in which they pidgeonhole all colors except for white old men who are not fit for the klatch , all creeds except for Christian …

Reply to  Gary Pearse
October 8, 2019 9:56 pm

Activism is literally white privilege.

Do you think that, if black Londoners were to go out and block the streets and get in people’s way as they try to go about their business, the police wouldn’t be sent out to round them up?

Phil Salmon
October 8, 2019 11:11 am

This chilling video taken by the Russian military – no doubt in protective suits – shows graphically the environmental destruction in the Arctic caused by climate. The music grippingly evokes the deadly miazma of ecosystem collapse.

There never was liquid water before in the Arctic Ocean – OMG what have we done? Birds cling to a last holdout on precarious cliffs – never before have they been forced to nest their young precariously on vertical cliffs – each one that falls to their death adds to a mountain of human guilt for such a tragedy. A polar bear lies dying by a poisoned creek – howling mournfully.

Alas the blighted seals have developed grotesquely overgrown front teeth – a quick fact-check from David Attenborough confirms this horrible mutation is quite new and without doubt caused by chemical contamination. Icebergs melt under a relentless sun into hideous shapes before disappearing forever. Another polar bear struggles in vain for life. Pure instinct refuses to surrender to merciless climate.

Adding insult to injury, human vandals damage centuries-old ice with an axe – have you no shame? Mutated seals languish in fetid stagnant pools. International tourists look on from a pleasure-boat. In panic a polar bear flees the stench from the polluted waterline and despairingly climbs a mountain face. Party-goers ignore the devastation caused by their kin and wave banale-ly at a camera. Where is Greta Thunberg when we need her?!

October 8, 2019 11:15 am

Greta’s handlers haven’t yet worked out that she’s only the opening act for the UN Secretary General, not the main performance.

The “show me the money” finale is the real highlight of the climate follies extravaganza, which Greta doesn’t get to do.

And, like David Suzuki’s kid, when G. has served her usefulness to the U.N., they will dump her for someone more pitiful.

Get ready for floods of tears from faithful supporters.
Or not.

Reply to  Mr.
October 8, 2019 11:58 am


searing and accurate

October 8, 2019 11:17 am

Like Bryan A I rushed to the calendar to make sure it wasn’t April 1 !!

October 8, 2019 11:19 am

I assume they will have a sign language interpreter for the language of choice in the background for those that are deaf.
They wont need braille for the blind as they shouldn’t be driving anyway although I do wonder at times.

Paula Cohen
October 8, 2019 11:19 am

Think of all the l-o-n-g, l-o-n-g lines waiting at the pump, and spewing fumes into the air, while everyone watches little Greta for 20 minutes and then takes a 15-minute test on her words of wisdom. If my brother and his family didn’t live in CA, I’d say go ahead and really make this a dream come true. California would be a better state if all the flakes, fruits, and nuts who live there (“why is California like a breakfast cereal?”) could be polluted out of existence by hundred-miles lines at all the gas pumps!

October 8, 2019 11:20 am

…and Martians have landed at Horsell Common near Woking.

Mike McMillan
Reply to  ResourceGuy
October 8, 2019 3:12 pm

“… minds that are to our minds as ours are to those of the beasts that perish, intellects vast and cool and unsympathetic, regarded this earth with envious eyes, and slowly and surely drew their plans against us.”

Except for the I.Q. part, a pretty good description of California’s government.

Reply to  ResourceGuy
October 9, 2019 6:21 am

I used to play on Horsell Common in the 1950s.
The only aliens I saw were trainee army despatch riders riding BSA motorbikes, wearing their leather jerkins and gloves, and their pudding basin safety helmets

Paula Cohen
Reply to  StephenP
October 9, 2019 9:07 am

You have obviously not read H.G. Wells’s “War of the Worlds.” Try it. One of the classic science fiction novels.

Rhys Jaggar
October 8, 2019 11:24 am

Is October 8th in USA equivalent to April 1st in UK?

Franz Dullaart
October 8, 2019 11:25 am

Since this not April Fool’s Day, it MUST be true – but I suggest that the “How dare you” bit is replaced with the clip of the woman exhorting us to “eat the babies” – and that there is a Kentucky Fried Babies next to the filling station – and (yes, there’s more) if you drive an EV, your baby burger is free.

Franz Dullaart
October 8, 2019 11:29 am

My comment is in the cryosphere – without naughty words. Why?

Jim Gorman
October 8, 2019 11:35 am

Who will go up in flames first? The gas stations or the people having to listen. Actually thinking about, maybe both should be included.

Nicholas McGinley
October 8, 2019 11:40 am

Words fail me.

October 8, 2019 11:43 am

This has to be a joke.

I certainly hope it is.


Joel Snider
Reply to  Bob Tisdale
October 8, 2019 1:01 pm

The fact that you have to say ‘hope’, is indicative of what we’ve learned to expect from this group.

They’ve made parody impossible to identify at face-value.

Reply to  Joel Snider
October 8, 2019 5:08 pm

are you Dilbert’s janitor?

Ed Fix
October 8, 2019 11:48 am

This is funny! Really hilari…wait, what? Whaddaya mean it’s real???

October 8, 2019 11:51 am

You may skip the video with an add-on Greta tip if you choose. Just hit the G-button on the side of the pump. All proceeds will go to clean climate needs and UN climate committee, unless another unrelated budget need arises in California. (That’s where some climate marketing consultants come in with wordsmithing the public statements of explanation, if any.)

October 8, 2019 11:56 am

I’m exempted since I already watched a movie of Chucky the bloody doll.

Ed Fix
October 8, 2019 11:57 am

The way young Greta’s Asperger Syndrome has been exploited by the alarmists is beyond shameful. Due to her form of autism, she is unable to evaluate what is told to her, and so wholeheartedly believes what she hears. And once she believes something, she is unable to change her mind when later facts show she is wrong.

The alarmists should be ashamed of the way they are exploiting her disability. But lack of shame is their own disability.

Clyde Spencer
Reply to  Ed Fix
October 8, 2019 1:15 pm

Ed Fix
You said, “And once she believes something, she is unable to change her mind when later facts show she is wrong.” Are you suggesting that liberals suffer from Asperger Syndrome?

Paul Penrose
Reply to  Ed Fix
October 8, 2019 2:30 pm

That’s an over-generalization of the syndrome. In the autism spectrum of disorders, symptoms vary quite a bit from individual to individual. There’s no way of knowing specifically what this girl struggles with the most, but I have a son that has Asperger’s and he does not believe everything he hears. In fact, oppositional defiance is one of his symptoms. Typically though, they have problems understanding emotions, not only other people’s, but their own as well. They are often baffled by common social situations and misread other’s motives (more than those not on the spectrum). I seriously doubt she has the ability to detect how she’s being manipulated, and at 16 likely does not have the knowledge base to evaluate even the basic claims of the CAGW conjecture, nor does she have a functioning BS detector (that comes with age and wisdom).

Frankly, I feel sorry for her. This is really going to set her back when she discovers the truth.

Ed Fix
Reply to  Paul Penrose
October 9, 2019 6:01 am

Of course my post is an over-generalization, but the evidence suggests that in this particular instance (global warming) of this particular case (Greta) it is close enough. She is very easily manipulated/brainwashed, and the Alarmists are exploiting that weakness for their own political ends. They don’t give a flip about her, and are totally unconcerned about the harm they are causing to her. She’s useful, and that’s all that matters.

October 8, 2019 11:58 am

It’s plausibility all the way down.

Here in England my company, which sells extremely durable hardware items, useful for 100 years, pulled an April 1st. stunt of considerable complexity. We wrote to all our UK customers warning of a new rule from the European Union, effectively immediately, April 1st, that all these items would need to be stamped with a ‘sell-by’ date of only six months after manufacture, beyond which date it would be illegal to sell them on the open market, and they could be disposed of only to an EU ‘Intervention Manager’ who would remove them from the market, or destroyed. We backed this with long, detailed excerpts (several pages) from the relevant legislation, couched in sober legalese. We advised that we had complained to our own government, which had strenuously tried to get the legislation halted or delayed, but had failed to persuade the Commissioners. And finally, we added a spoof engineering drawing showing how the ‘sell-by’ date was to be etched on the products, which contained a lot of ridiculous jokey stuff that completely gave the game away.

What shocked us was that, of all the customers we sent it to, almost NOBODY picked up on the date, and saw it for what it was. Some were near apolectic. Some customers, who had huge long-term stocks of product, needed counselling. Even when it was explained to them, some still did not believe it a spoof. Three customers told us they would never deal with us again (I recall that they did, after a space).

They were all, because of long and terrifying experience with the EU, prepared to believe this ridiculous ‘legislation’ was true. Even some of our own employees were too stunned to see the funny side of it. I suspect that, in the States, the antics of the California, Oregon, Washington lawmakers are engendering a similar suspension of disbelief. I’ve never made an April 1st. joke since.

Greg Cavanagh
Reply to  mothcatcher
October 8, 2019 5:21 pm

Since the EU legislate the power consumption of a jug (to boil water) and a vacuum cleaner, all bets are off regarding everything else (parody or otherwise).

Nicholas McGinley
Reply to  mothcatcher
October 11, 2019 1:40 pm

“It’s plausibility all the way down.”
Well, not strictly speaking all the way down.
Only down to the turtles.

James Kent
October 8, 2019 12:02 pm

It’s a joke guys. But a good one. Made me laugh at least.

Reply to  James Kent
October 8, 2019 1:23 pm

It’s California though. That makes it both scary and funny at the same time.

The pods coming out of Santa Mira by truck were much easier to laugh at with some entertaining movie scare factor. You got to go home after the movie.

But California over reach has been institutionalized without apology when they get it wrong.

Joel O'Bryan
Reply to  James Kent
October 8, 2019 3:16 pm

Naming Oregon gave it away as a joke. In both Oregon and New Jersey retail consumers can’t pump their own gas.

October 8, 2019 12:03 pm

About that time is when I leave the state

Ed Fix
Reply to  RB
October 9, 2019 6:04 am

You mean, you’re still there????

October 8, 2019 12:07 pm

It is getting so that The Onion and The Babylon Bee are the most credible parts of the US news media.

Bruce Cobb
October 8, 2019 12:13 pm

Reminds me of the poem, “Rainy Day Greta” which goes:

Well, she’ll shame you when you’re trying to be so good
she’ll shame you just like she said she would
she’ll shame you when you’re trying to go home
And she’ll shame you when you’re there all alone
But I would not feel so all alone
Everybody must get shamed
Well, she’ll shame you when you’re walking on the street
she’ll shame you when you’re tryin’ to keep your seat
she’ll shame you when you’re walkin’ on the floor
she’ll shame you when you’re walkin’ to the door
But I would not feel so all alone
Everybody must get shamed
she’ll shame you when you’re at the breakfast table
she’ll shame you when you are young and able
she’ll shame you when you’re tryin’ to make a buck
Then she’ll shame you and then she’ll say “good luck”
Tell ya what, I would not feel so all alone
Everybody must get shamed
Well, she’ll shame you and say that it’s the end
Then she’ll shame you and then she’ll come back again
she’ll shame you when you’re riding in your car
she’ll shame you when you’re playing your guitar
Yes, but I would not feel so all alone
Everybody must get shamed alright
Well, she’ll shame you when you walk all alone
she’ll shame you when you are walking home
she’ll shame you and then say you are brave
she’ll shame you when you are set down in your grave
But I would not feel so all alone
Everybody must get shamed

Don Jindra
October 8, 2019 12:14 pm

I wonder if the folks who think this satire is outrageous yet plausible realize so-called conservatives have done this exact thing to women who want an abortion.

Reply to  Don Jindra
October 8, 2019 12:37 pm

Meat is murder, abortion is choice?

Merlotte Bookly
Reply to  Don Jindra
October 8, 2019 12:45 pm

Yes – because fake “man-made” climate change is totally the same thing as murdering a child.

Reply to  Don Jindra
October 8, 2019 12:58 pm

I really didn’t know much about strawman arguments until I started looking into the climate debate tactics being used.

Reply to  Don Jindra
October 8, 2019 1:04 pm

So abortion is like buying some gas. Well put.

Paula Cohen
Reply to  Hugs
October 8, 2019 1:46 pm


Luke of the D
Reply to  Don Jindra
October 8, 2019 1:26 pm

So killing babies is the same as pumping gas… hmm… yeah, I guess you could be right. But wait, I thought we were supposed to eat the babies?

Don Jindra
Reply to  Luke of the D
October 8, 2019 6:41 pm

Y’all prove my point. The hypocrisy is noted. When partisans can see only their own outrage they are easy to dismiss.

Rich Davis
Reply to  Don Jindra
October 8, 2019 7:27 pm

Yes, indeed. We certainly are dismissing you.

Don Jindra
Reply to  Rich Davis
October 8, 2019 9:46 pm

Thing is, I’m no partisan. I see the phoniness of both left and right. The left thinks its outrage is ‘privileged.’ The right thinks its outrage is ‘privileged.’ Both sides want a nanny state to teach us how to behave. Neither side has the moral high ground. Both sides are full of hypocrisy. For the good of the country, at some point partisans should stop lying to themselves.

Rich Davis
Reply to  Rich Davis
October 9, 2019 3:56 am

It’s not “hypocrisy”, Don. It’s a fundamental clash of incompatible values. Might as well invoke Godwin’s Law here. Why couldn’t the Poles and Jews just listen to the Germans and find common ground? Their hypocrisy led to a very expensive and inconvenient series of events for the rest of us, wouldn’t you say? How could they justify their selfishness?

You’re blind to the fact that you too have a principle you cling to as in your mind “privileged”. Your radical libertarian view that individuals can and should be absolutely autonomous atomic units in society causes you to utterly dismiss the rights of one human being because s/he is in any way inconvenient to the autonomous one.

Don Jindra
Reply to  Rich Davis
October 9, 2019 8:23 am

Rich Davis, False. You don’t know me. You should stop fantasizing about who I am. I am no libertarian. I recognize the ties and obligations we humans have as humans and as good citizens. What I do try to be is non-ideological. What I referred to above is not an incomparable clash of values. For you to bring up the Nazis in relation to what I said is ridiculous. Hypocrisy is simply hypocrisy. Cherished values get challenged, then some people use it as an excuse to stop thinking.

Rich Davis
Reply to  Rich Davis
October 9, 2019 9:50 am

Don buddy, I’m certainly not fantasizing about you! What you said was “both sides want a nanny state to teach us how to behave”. This reference tags you as a libertarian thinker. It also tags you as a shallow thinker. There are only two sides? Really? The reality is that there are many different values that individuals hold sometimes inconsistently. In the one example here, either you value human life as something never to be taken unjustly, or you don’t. If you don’t, you dismiss other people who do value human life as being partisans or slaves to an ideology, superstition, etc.

Bottom line is that the narcissist knows that all his opinions are correct values, and everyone else needs to let go of their irrational beliefs and get on board with reality.

Reply to  Don Jindra
October 8, 2019 8:08 pm

Fascinating how the troll can only see the outrage of others.
Like most leftists he just assumes that all right thinking people agree with him.

Don Jindra
Reply to  MarkW
October 8, 2019 9:54 pm

I’m no leftist. I despise the left. I pound on them at least as much as I pound on the right. Yet you assumed I am a leftist based on what? On the fact that I see rampant hypocrisy? This is what’s wrong with political debate these days. Too many people have stopped listening. They assume they are so right there’s no reason to listen.

Mick O'Keefe
Reply to  Don Jindra
October 8, 2019 1:30 pm

Don, an apparently acceptable reply to your comment for progressives would be –
“some people did something . . .”

Reply to  Don Jindra
October 8, 2019 8:07 pm

Killing your baby is the equivalent to buying gas?

Bryan A
October 8, 2019 12:20 pm

Well Ya know, they gotta do something to make dumping fossil fuels into your tank as costly and time consuming as dumping electrons generated by fossil fuels into your n+battery

October 8, 2019 12:26 pm

Flying penguins (National G?) and Italian spaghetti trees harvest (BBC?), two famous 1 Apr videos.

Reply to  trafamadore
October 8, 2019 4:17 pm

Yes, that was the BBC trafamadore. That was in the days when they still had a proper sense of humour!

Steve Z
October 8, 2019 12:32 pm

Any state legislator who votes for this in California or Oregon is guaranteed to get voted out of office next term. New York, maybe not, because many of those who live in NYC don’t own cars and rely on mass transit.

Traffic around Los Angeles and San Francisco is already a nightmare, with many commuters spending over an hour in traffic each way. Adding at least 20 minutes to the wait at each fillup to listen to the Greta Dumbbird Show is bound to frazzle even the most patient of drivers.

The wait is probably going to be longer than that, since each gasoline pump could only service a maximum of three cars per hour, instead of about 12 cars per hour now, assuming that it takes about 5 minutes per driver to insert a credit or debit card, punch in a PIN, pump gas, and get a receipt. At busy gas stations, the waiting times would quadruple.

Also, if a driver fills their tank once a week, they would lose about 17 hours per year listening to little Greta saying the world will end in ten years. The time we have left is so precious, we don’t want to waste 170 hours, or over seven full days of our lives over the next ten years, listening to Greta lecture us!

October 8, 2019 12:40 pm

In a moment of sanity, They have amended the bill to allow people with Hybrids to only listen to a 10 minute video.

Bruce Cobb
October 8, 2019 12:43 pm

How many “Hail Gretas” do I need to do, and how many “Our Gores” to fill our heating oil tank for the coming months? I would prefer to skip the hours-long Greta speech, which of course would mean listening to the same perhaps 5-minute harangue over and over. I’m bad.

Gordon Dressler
October 8, 2019 12:47 pm

Hmmmm . . . I wonder what the effect of raw gasoline spouted onto the gas pump’s video display might have?

Just saying . . .

October 8, 2019 12:51 pm

CBC’s Nicole Mortillaro is asking the question in her latest column “technology and Science”:
What is Extinction Rebellion and what does it want?

In less than a year, London-based group has spread around world, including Canada

As usual just as for Greta’s sudden fame, the CBC never digs deep.
Proof? Even some academic from University of Alberta Political Science cannot answer the question but has some ideas:

Laurie Adkin, an associate professor at the University of Alberta’s department of political science, said that it’s unclear why XR has grown so quickly. But she has a few ideas why it could be. One is that we’re seeing an older generation of climate researchers and people concerned over climate change taking part after decades of inaction. And she also said that XR might have some staying power, simply because the human race and biodiversity is at the end of its rope.

LOL Really that’s why XR is growing so fast… With associate profs like this one, why spending tens of thousands of $ for an education!
Mortillaro does call on perennial activist George Monbiot to sell XR.

Writer and activist George Monbiot is also a strong supporter of XR. Speaking from London with CBC News, he said one of the reasons he supports the group is because it’s unlike anything he’s ever seen before.
“It’s really the first movement in my life that’s been of sufficient scale to address this issue,” Monbiot said. “I’ve been an activity and journalist in this field for 34 years, and there’ve been lots of movements coming and going, and a lot of them have been great … but none of them has reached this scale and this impact.”

And the link goes to Monbiot’s blog. Mortillaro’s investigation stops here. No doubt this ICIJ member won’t dig deeper. Too bad since Monbiot is linked to Sir Crispin Tickell, former Chairman of the Thomson Reuters Foundation and great green pusher, who managed to get him some College appointment back then, check Climategate emails… Yes, CBC, the Thomsons, the richest family in Canada… Still not interested digging, Nicole?
XR is also partly funded with support for the Soros network of foundations, the Tides foundation etc… That may also explain why it caught fire so quickly no? NO!
The same green foundations that have been waging an info war against Canada’s oil and Gas industry.

When the Soros name was mentioned in the Paradise Papers disclosure, the International Consortium for Investigative Journalists member CBC explained they called the offices of George Soros who… did not return their call. End of story.
That may explain why Mortillaro does not go further in unearthing the deleterious links between billionaires and XR… And why her article serves just a disguised call to arm by an associate professor activist:

Adkins said. “There is a really high really high cost for individuals dissipate and civil disobedience. And, therefore, it’s not an action that many people can easily join in.”
But, she added, if it’s done on a large scale, it’s more effective, since authorities can’t arrest everyone.

Once again, CBC does agitprop under the guise of information. They had prepared the election campaign six months before for their bosses by ramping up the climate crisis with alarmist articles. No mystery polls claim climate is the number one issue…

October 8, 2019 12:54 pm

Could be worse. The law could make you watch Al Gore’s movie. They really should think it through. they could install bicycles hooked to generators and make you ride until you have generated enough electricity to off set the gas purchase. It would be a twofur as it would decease obesity and improve health.

October 8, 2019 1:02 pm

But this is real.

“Corporations told to draw up climate rules or have them imposed

Bank of England governor gives firms two years to agree rules for reporting climate risks

The governor of the Bank of England has warned major corporations that they have two years to agree rules for reporting climate risks before global regulators devise their own and make them compulsory.

Mark Carney said companies should use their next two annual financial reports to road test how they document the impact of the climate emergency on their businesses.

He said progress had been made by many of the largest banks and energy companies to harmonise how they report their risks, but added: “Progress in both quantity and quality is uneven across sectors.”

Speaking in Tokyo at a conference held by the Taskforce on Climate-related Financial Disclosures (TCFD), Carney said there was an appetite among investors to support companies that understand their climate risks following research that showed they were likely to expand at a faster rate.”

“Carney launched the TCFD in 2015 with Michael Bloomberg, the billionaire owner of the financial data provider that carries his name.”

October 8, 2019 1:12 pm

The Babylon Bee is hilarious. 🙂

October 8, 2019 1:13 pm

To make electric car charging viable they need to increase the video time to 60 minutes or more and make the quiz 60 written questions. 90% pass to refuel.

Jeff Labute
October 8, 2019 1:15 pm

It is likely a joke. My guess is MOST gas pump hardware might not even support streaming video to their monochome bitmap display with audio. I think new pump hardware might be around to run ads. They might not want to void the purpose of an ad playing pump for Greta’s sake.

Reply to  Jeff Labute
October 8, 2019 1:28 pm

Forcing change on gas stations is certainly not without precedence. That’s why the mom and pop stations disappeared long ago.

Coeur de Lion
October 8, 2019 1:25 pm

Great idea. Many will recoil from this nasty unbalanced insulting drivel and become deniers

Mike McHenry
October 8, 2019 1:27 pm

Sooner or later California democrats are going to do something really stupid vis a vis climate that will enrage the population.

John Sandhofner
October 8, 2019 1:30 pm

I see this as satire. Living in CA I have no patience to have to do this. Every time you fuel? Good grief. I would think most liberals would find this action punitive.

Andy in Epsom
October 8, 2019 1:34 pm

This makes perfect sense to me as it weill be part of the attempt to stop people using cars.

October 8, 2019 1:37 pm

Aaagh. This will just give the rotten eco-loons an idea.
Having to stand there waiting, watching, and answering a quiz would take so long, it would add up to about as long as it would take to charge an electric car.
Thus the advantage of the fuel car over the electric car is eliminated.
So you’re fully softened up for when they ban fuel cars altogether.
And in the meantime, you’d only be allowed a ‘ration’ of a few gallons at a time.
No tank filling, you car has to be as useless as an electric car…….
No cash sales either, and you’ll have to swipe your drivers license through the scanner just to make sure your purchases are recorded.
And the video you have to sit through will be like those awful corporate ‘training’ videos, where you have to keep pressing buttons to show you’re awake or it takes longer, and you can’t skip to the quiz at the end,
and the questions are always different so your mate can’t give you the answers to speed things up, and
it’s an awful nightmare.
But you don’t get to wake up…….

October 8, 2019 1:42 pm

Celebrities I’m told are exempt because in the trial, 80% failed the test and the other 20% objected to being told “How dare you”.

mr bliss
October 8, 2019 1:49 pm

Carrying a hammer in your car may come in useful…..

October 8, 2019 2:21 pm

In woe-derful california, gas is over $4 a gallon because

(1) California imports its oil from Saudia Arabia (instead of drilling for our own) and we know what happens in Saudi Arabia doesn’t stay in Saudia Arabia.

(2) Four refineries that rely on Saudi oil are down for “unscheduled” maintenance

(3) California is having to import gas from other fly-over states to meet demand

But don’t worry, prices will drop by Thanksgiving when they go back up because of increased Thanksgiving driving, but be assured they’ll go back down again before Christmas when they go back up again because of increased holiday driving, but rest easy they’ll go back down again until California raises excise taxes on gasoline again next June!

Grab your ankles and smile 🙂

Ian MacCulloch
October 8, 2019 2:23 pm

And not far behind from “The Betoota Advocate” just to the west of Cunnamulla, Qld
Greta Thunberg Speech Reminds Conservative Of Other Times Insolent Women Raised Voices At Him


Local conservative voter and staunch climate skeptic, Alan Bolt (55) says he’s all for free speech – but it’s worth noting that throwing a tantrum is a sure fire way to get people off side.

This comes as teenage climate activist Greta Thunberg captures the world’s attention in a fierce and passionate speech at the United Nations headquarters, accusing world leaders of failing to act on climate change.

“This is all wrong. I shouldn’t be up here. I should be back in school on the other side of the ocean, yet you all come to us young people for hope. How dare you,” said the 16-year-old, her voice trembling with anger at times.

Her speech has infuriated climate change skeptics around the world, who find themselves triggered as they are reminded of times other insolent women raised their voices at them.

“It’s just not helpful” says the semi-retired retailer of white goods from the upper middle class Hillsong enclave of Betoota Heights.

“She’s throwing a tantrum. Speaking into her microphone made of coal and wearing clothes made of other coal products. She’s a complete hypocrite”

“She’s achieving nothing more than getting people offside and encouraging tens of millions of students around the world to protest in the streets every six months”

The Swedish campaigner’s brief address electrified the start of the Climate Action Summit in New York, which she travelled to by boat to shut up the skeptics who feel that proving that she uses aeroplanes means that global warming isn’t real.

The UN event was aimed at mobilising government and business to break international paralysis over carbon emissions, which hit record highs last year despite decades of warnings from scientists.

However, for millions of climate change denying conservatives around the world, most who will die before the true disasters of environmental vandalism rears their heads, Greta Thunberg has only reconfirmed their views that young women should be seen and not heard.

“There’s no use whinging and skipping school” says Alan.

“Even if climate change is real, she isn’t achieving anything by playing the victim card” shouts Alan.

“I never had it easy!” says Alan, who bought his first house on an apprentice wage when Aboriginal people were still considered flora and fauna by Australian law.

“Young people need to stop complaining and finding reasons to throw their toys out of the cot”

Greg Cavanagh
October 8, 2019 2:33 pm

I couldn’t tell if this was a parody or not. But I do remember that the Bee is a parody site, so I was mostly convinced it was parody. Thankfully the comments under the article convinced me it was parody. But seriously, you had me worried for a moment. It is something a Californian politician would say and promote.

Ed Zuiderwijk
Reply to  Greg Cavanagh
October 8, 2019 3:21 pm

Yes, it is parody, but one that is uncomfortably close.

Mike McHenry
October 8, 2019 2:50 pm

One of the ironies of Greta is she comes from Sweden. Sea level in Sweden is falling due to glacial rebound. Stockholm is 59 degrees north lat. So the country on the whole will benefit from warming.

Joel O'Bryan
October 8, 2019 2:53 pm

The gas price on the pump in the top picture comes out at $3.94/gallon.

If Californians could still buy gas for anything under $4/gallon, I’m sure they’d be happy to be verbally assaulted by the Little Swedish Nazi-in-training.

Ed Zuiderwijk
October 8, 2019 3:13 pm

The US constitution says somewhere that no foreign prince holds sway over the lands of the union. That also applies to foreign princesses. Any driver confronted by such nonsense should make a citizens arrest of the station’s proprietor for high treason.

Gunga Din
October 8, 2019 3:48 pm

So…. If the pump doesn’t play videos? They can’t sell gas?
I suspect that many will hear the last of the agree teen, Grrrrreta, as they fill up their U-Hauls on their way out of those states for good.

Gunga Din
Reply to  Gunga Din
October 9, 2019 2:56 pm

…” hear the last of the angry teen, Grrrrreta,”…

October 8, 2019 3:53 pm

Surely somewhere someone’s calendar says it’s “April 1st.”

John Endicott
Reply to  ScienceABC123
October 9, 2019 8:05 am

Yeah, but it’s a novelty calendar where every day is April 1st 😉

October 8, 2019 5:15 pm

You had me going for a while. I know about the Onion, but I never heard of the The Babylon Bee’
It’s not much different from the other proposals in California that I have seen recently….LOL
When I started reading the comments, I then knew it was a joke … LOL

Don’t read the Onion any more. There is enough fake news out there from the MSM, and I got tired of the Onion.
This is the first time I remember that a totally false story was published on WUWT – Thanks Moderator !!!



John Endicott
Reply to  Jon P Peterson
October 9, 2019 8:01 am

Fortunately I had heard of the Babylon Bee before, so knew right away that it was satire, but can well understand why someone who hadn’t would have a hard time realizing it was satire when real ideas pushed by Cali libs can be just as wacked.

David S
October 8, 2019 5:20 pm

Sounds like a hoax. Its too dumb even for Democrats.

Master of the Obvious
October 8, 2019 6:12 pm

When CNN ran a story about a proposed trillion dollar coin, I figured they had been punked by The Onion.

Sadly not.

While I don’t live in one of the, um, reported states, I’m going to hold-out that I’m not wrong again…..

James Kent
October 8, 2019 6:25 pm

I can’t believe some people are actually taking this seriously!

It’s from the Babylon Bee! Well known for its delicious satire and parodies of the left (

Although I have no doubt there are some leftist twerps out there who would think it was a workable idea worthy of merit.

John Endicott
Reply to  James Kent
October 9, 2019 7:58 am

James have you ever taken a look at some of the far out wacky ideas the left in this country has proposed? It’s not always so easy to distinguish reality from satire, particularly in a bastion of left-wing thought such as California.

October 8, 2019 7:11 pm

It’s a hoax. St. Greta would [horrors!] never allow her image to be displayed on a fossil fuel pump…

… well, unless she was receiving royalties from Big Oil.

Hocus Locus
October 8, 2019 7:44 pm

I’d like to put an ENSO meter in my doomsday bunker. It’s the only indicator I’d have showing conditions in the outside world.

October 8, 2019 9:31 pm

April 1st already?

Henning Nielsen
October 8, 2019 10:39 pm

This is a joke of course. 20 minutes to wait before filling the tank, means a breakdown in traffic. Politically, it is suicidal.

October 9, 2019 12:20 am

“new bills working their way through state legislatures in New York, California, Oregon, Hawaii, and several other progressive states will require you to listen to a Greta Thunberg lecture before purchasing gasoline”

This lecture?

Reply to  chaamjamal
October 9, 2019 1:15 am

The correct link to the greta lecture

October 9, 2019 3:49 am

So instead of Big Brother we have Little Sister

October 9, 2019 4:25 am

I blame the Mayans wot started it all-
I will judge the sincerity of the sorry by the size of the compo. Who’s handling the class action by the way?

Vangel Vesovski
October 9, 2019 5:29 am

Funny. I love The Onion.

October 9, 2019 6:55 am

Do Greta’s puppetmasters not even see the stark analogous optics of Greta’s sneering face with the images of the Hitler Youth from the mid 20th century? Greta could almost be a satire of fascism if she weren’t supposed to be “real.” I think the comment that Climate nutcases have formed a religious cult are so true. Greta is much scarier than any climate change I’ve encountered.

James Bull
October 9, 2019 7:43 am

All they’re doing is trying to make it take as long to fill up with fuel as it takes to recharge an electric car.
Got hours to go yet.

James Bull

Dean Miller
October 9, 2019 9:21 am

How would this work in Oregon since the state does not allow people to pump their own gas? Do the attendants have to listen to her shrill hundreds of times a day? From a parent of kids who recently graduated from being a teenager, they are idiots. Why anyone gives this kid a platform and considers her an expert is beyond absurd.

October 9, 2019 9:31 am

I thought I had seen all the craziness but I was mistaken. I guess all airline passengers will have to do the same before boarding. Come on you smart lawyers out there – sue these stupid States. They must be infringing some of my liberty enshrined in law.

October 9, 2019 9:35 am

I realize the Babylon Bee is a satire site, but when I read the article I was almost ready to believe it, at least for California. I lived there for 43 years and moved out just before the craziness went into overdrive (2014). Even then they were over the edge of the insanity cliff and clinging to the edge by their fingernails. Since then they have lost their hold and are tumbling down the rocks.

My only caution to The Babylon Bee would be this. Don’t give them any more suggestions. There’s bound to be somebody in the government of California who will actually think it’s a good idea.

Yiddish Lion
October 9, 2019 9:44 am

Things have gone so far left I actually thought this was real at first. Except I was expecting it to be in Europe or something. Then I started reading it and figured out.

Yiddish Lion
October 9, 2019 12:30 pm

HAHAHAHA!!!!! The left has gone so far off the rails I actually thought this was real at first!!!! I just thought it was going to be in Europe or something.

October 9, 2019 12:40 pm

A lot have said it is a joke. it’s also impractical, moronic, stupid, idiotic, demented, retarded, delusional, and did I mention nonsense. But it is in line with the way they think. As a dictator. And not a smart one.

Sorry for the lack of dignity.

October 9, 2019 12:42 pm

I didn’t realize that April 1st was so late this year!

BillThe Geo
October 9, 2019 2:38 pm

Clearly this an early April 1 joke. But Sacramento is so full of delusional political lefty ignorant zealots that this announcement could almost be believed. Just in case, I will have a hammer in my car to smash every screen image of Greta that I see at every gas station – come what may! GoFundMe please be at the ready.

October 9, 2019 4:47 pm

SOMEONE PLEASE put a note up at the top of this message saying that it’s a hoax. Otherwise it makes this blog (and posters here) look silly.

BTW, all you have to do is to go to the Babylon Bee website to see that the whole website is a spoof. (Hint: One of the current articles has Trump declaring the clocks will be set back–not an hour, but two years, so he’ll have more time in office.)

Meanwhile, to posters here who didn’t see through it: I realize it makes you feel good to think The Other Side is dumb. But they’re not any dumber than this side. We’re all human beings.

October 9, 2019 11:29 pm

“SOMEONE PLEASE put a note up at the top of this message saying that it’s a hoax. Otherwise it makes this blog (and posters here) look silly.”

Nah we’re just mimicking leftys as in- It’s not true BUT… (it could be)
Except with the mad watermelons it’s very likely to be true anytime soon as you can’t discount anything with them. Check out the ER mob for starters and it’s all about the struggle. Doesn’t matter what for where or in what costume just so long as you’re seen to be seen struggling.

Johann Wundersamer
October 16, 2019 10:09 pm

Ygdrasil, the Horse of Odin, will wither.
Surtur, the Prince of the south,
will burn the land.
Fenris, the Wulf, will devour the sun.
The gods all will die in the slaughter.

But the Nordic people will rise again under a new sign.

– occurs Greta inmidst all the blue haze –

Subduing all the weakly christianed Anglo-Saxons.

– to be continued next –

Johann Wundersamer
October 16, 2019 10:21 pm

Hollywood version:

Ygdrasil, the World ash-tree, will wither.
Surtur, the Prince of the south,
will burn the land.
Fenris, the Wulf, will devour the sun.
The gods all will die in the slaughter.

But the Nordic people will rise again under a new sign.

– occurs Greta inmidst all the blue haze –

Subduing all the weakly christianed Anglo-Saxons.

– to be continued next –