Delusional psychopophagy is the mere result of the power of Climate Denial
Guest essay by Eric Worrall
As a homage to the amount of attention cast in our direction by the psycho-scientific community, I have decided to pay tribute to their cause, by releasing a web based DIY generator of scientific treatises on the phenomenon of climate “denial”.
The generator takes random phrases and combines them into a surprisingly readable treatise. The original code was created in ancient times (like before 2000) for Mac computers.
The following is an example of this random artificial intelligence at work:
“We can deduce that, irrespective of all empirical conditions, our diagnosis (and what we have alone been able to show is that this is the case) are what first give rise to the Psychopathologies. Therefore, the psychopathaological manifold (and to avoid all misapprehension, it is necessary to explain that this is true) can not take account of peer reviewed literature. Applied logic excludes the possibility of our conclusion. We can deduce that general logic should only be used as a canon for necessity. Delusional psychopophagy is the mere result of the power of my grant, a blind but indispensable function of the soul. As will easily be shown in the next section, it is obvious that, irrespective of all empirical conditions, the noumena abstract from all content of a priori knowledge, but the paralogisms would thereby be made to contradict the paralogisms of human unreason. In natural theology, Hume tells us that the Psychopathologies, in accordance with the principles of the psychopathaological manifold, abstract from all content of knowledge, as is proven in the ontological manuals.”
Perhaps readers can take the time to evaluate the quality of output from the random text generator, with the quality of abstruse treatises from other sources. Suggestions for improving the generator are also welcome – for example, suggestions for words and phrases which should be included in the generated text.
Try it here:
http://eric.worrall.name/kant.cgi
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” psycho-scientific community”. Given that their assault on sceptics is based on the presumption that their CAGW computer models are accurate, even though they have now been measurably and visibly badly wrong for some 17 years, ‘psycho-babble’ may be a better term.
Impressive results. Would either of the following phrases be worth considering:
“collective Nobel paradigm shift”
“Recursive Flimflam”
Jordan – done, I have added both phrases.
pax, I added the word “spatial”, but it hasn’t shown up yet. Perhaps its use is too silly even for the software to stomach 🙂
Speaking of bullshît I had to look up what DIY means. We live in a world where people think they look smart if they use acronyms.
“our direction by the psycho-scientific community,”
I’d change the sentance to “psycho pseudo scientific closed community”
Don’t want to push too much (this can be a bit addictive), but how about:
“Trenberthian Null Inversion”
“Mannian Principal Hypothesis Confirmation”
The Science Wars have already fought this battle with Alan Sokal’s 1996 Duke University journal Social Text essay, Transgressing the Boundaries: Towards a Transformative Hermeneutics of Quantum Gravity.
Do not forget the pioneering work in this area, the postmodern generator: http://www.elsewhere.org/pomo/
Steven Richards: If you are referring to the machines manufactured by “Industry’s Biggest Mistake”, I do remember them. I learned to write FORTRAN programs on an 1123… had a whopping 62KB memory. Ahh..”…those were the days…”
Gilbert K. Arnold says: …1123?
How about a 1620??
I [clearly] have more grey hair than thee.
As far as I can tell Sokal’s paper wasn’t computer generated.
Sometimes important new discoveries are described in language that is intelligible to almost nobody. Someone else has to come up with the intelligible version. My favorite example is Steinmetz. Until he came along, people had to use fairly nasty calculus based techniques to analyze AC circuits. Steinmetz didn’t change the underlying theory, he invented a new way to describe it. The result is that my first year students can analyze AC circuits almost as easily as they can analyze DC circuits. 🙂
So, it is possible for something unintelligible to also be profound. That’s why folks are easily taken in by junk. They are afraid to admit (even to themselves) that they can’t understand something important and fear that the ‘people who matter’ can understand it. The Emperor’s New Clothes
I haven’t tried the text generator yet, but this sentence stuck out like a sore thumb:
“Delusional psychopophagy is the mere result of the power of my grant, a blind but indispensable function of the soul.”
I would expect something more like the following, in order to help hide the grant-grubbing motive:
Delusional psychopophagy being a new field of research, further study will be necessary in order to delve into the epistomological underpinnings of this opportune, value-laden, and fascinating human endeavor.
KANT.cgi. Ouch. That’ll hurt the social democrats.
(But fitting).
Steve Case says:
April 13, 2014 at 2:50 am
“Speaking of bullshît I had to look up what DIY means. We live in a world where people think they look smart if they use acronyms.”
That acronym DIY was used (and applied) excessively by all Punks and New Wavers in the 70ies. It’s not exactly exotic.
Never forget the leading light of the New Left, Noam Chomsky.
http://rubberducky.org/cgi-bin/chomsky.pl
commieBob says: April 13, 2014 at 5:17 am “Sometimes important new discoveries are described in language that is intelligible to almost nobody.”
This is precisely what lead to the Science Wars, the hypothesis that science and truth is the social construct of an elite. Merely because one fails to understand a truth does not make it false.
Can I suggest this software be named the “Lewny Bot” and let it be known that for the first time a computer program can completely replicate the “intelligence” of a known human. We could even send a sample of this code out on a transmission to the stars to let them know that this about sums us up, we are actually as thick as s%&t and to not bother contacting us. In that way La Lewny could actually provide a useful service to the species – until the aliens figure out our sense of humour at which point we will both be in on the joke. That should at least break the ice and get first contact off on the right foot. God works in wondrous ways?
I don’t see the term psychobabble appearing here.
If it is psychobabble you have to replace “97%” with “up to 100%”.
Hey, this could get you in a lot of trouble, what with academics accusing you of plagiarizing their best work.
” . . dogs and cats living together . . .”
” . . squirrel . . ”
” . . . space-time continuum . . .”
I can’t read too much of it as I’ll collapse from laughing.
ha! Late night self abuse, then, should only be used as a canon for the Ideal. Let us apply this to climate physics.
Let’s not forget the Shakespeare Insult Generator, who wouldn’t like to say “Thou reeky flap-mouthed lout!”to the AGW moonbats
http://www.pangloss.com/seidel/Shaker/
I knew a colleague who had to write grant requests for a school district.
He quickly noticed that each grant request had to be 20 pages long, a description of the request on the first page and a summary of the monies involved on the last, but nobody seemed to look at the 18 pages in the middle. He create a software generator to produce the 18 pages in the middle.
It worked quite well, as indeed, nobody looked at the 18 pages in the middle .. for two years.
I propose we change Climate Change to Irritable Climate Syndrome because all that is produced is pure s**t.
I was thinking a widget that produced hockey stick type graphs from random inputs would be a handy accompanyment, but I understand such things already exist and are in widespread use in Climastrology.