CEI doesn’t support recycling mandates, but there’s nothing wrong with voluntary recycling. And that’s what we’re doing here—recycling our March for Science jokes from last week for tomorrow’s People’s Climate March—with a few additions.
–Why did the People’s Climate marchers feel such a sense of déjà vu?
Because they were just here last week.
–Why did so many marchers wear heavy make-up?
To hide their decline.
–Why did the marcher walk smack into a tree that was right in front of him?
Because he refused to let an empirical observation get in his way.
–Why did hundreds of marchers kiss the feet of one woman?
Because she was a model.
–Why were so many of the marchers in tears?
Because they were far too sensitive.
–Why did several hundred science marchers bump into each other at a red light?
Because they refused to recognize that the march had paused.
–What percentage of the marchers had kale for lunch?
–What did the Mexican food vendor say when the marchers complained about his salsa?
“I don’t change my recipes; the salsa is settled.”
–Why won’t there be any People’s Climate Marches in countries named “People’s Republic of …”?
Because the marchers aren’t that crazy.