Global Warming, er, Climate Change is omnipotent – it has now destroyed April Fools Day

Dr. Roy Spencer has found something quite stunning.

Global Warming is Destroying April Fools Day

stop-global-warmingHe writes:

For the last few days I’ve been trying to think of some crazy, almost-believable angle to illustrate the absurdity of the current global warming movement.

Post it on April 1st, and say “Ha! Fooled ya! The warmists didn’t really say that…but I made you think they did!”

Alas, the global warming alarmists have already used up all of the crazy ideas themselves. As far as they are concerned, global warming causes everything.

Now, as the new 2014 IPCC report is revealed, we find that a lack of warming for 15+ years has the experts even more concerned than ever. So, the greater the amount of good news on the global warming front, the greater their hand-wringing.

How can we make fun of them when they are already parodying themselves?? It’s disheartening.

So, I would like to add an item to that long list of things that global warming is destroying…

…global warming is destroying April Fools Day.

===============================================================

In other news, Trenberth’s missing heat or maybe Cook’s  four hiroshima bombs per second finally had an effect:

BBC_Splode

h/t to The HockeySchtick

 

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KevinM

Off topic early in thread, but heres Bloomburg bemoaning a baseball stadium that will be under water by 2100. Is it too late to cancel my season tickets?
http://www.bloomberg.com/news/2014-03-25/this-could-be-the-priciest-baseball-park-in-the-whole-atlantic-ocean.html

george e. conant

Tipping point CO2 threshold to cause Earths’ axial tilt to tilt some more or less with medium certainty. Also imminently pressing concern is the rotation of the earth will stop and reverse direction. Gravity will fail and everything not secured to bedrock will float to the edge of space. Cats will bark. Computer models will speak Klingon. Elvis sightings will intensify…..

Donald A. Neill

“SCIENTISTS: GLOBAL WARMING TO BLAME FOR GLOBAL COOLING”
Sadly, this also is not a joke.

TobiasN

I think I recognize the type that would make this joke. And if I thought there was anything going on under the surface with these people, it would encourage me.
But I don’t think there is. A joke like this – I think that’s all they got.
They natural release of humor requires swimming in deeper water/having self-awareness and that’s not them.
[“The” natural release of humor? Mod]

heysuess

Climate Change will lead to Calendar Change. Mark. My. Words. It’s all gone Pete Tong.

AJB
JK

URGENT MESSAGE! IPCC computer models, which have been surprisingly accurate, now predict that within the next few hours lightening will strike all battery storage systems used by farmers in grain mills, causing an immediate current reversal. This event will un-grind more than 70 million sacks of wheat flour, and before farmers can get the sacks open, the wheat will be too green to harvest!

Gunga Din

😎
I remember seeing that list a few years ago.
I didn’t look at it that closely.
Is record cold on the list?
It should be. No fooling!

KenB

It’s those mindfart’s that cause perpetual warming.!

Robert of Ottawa

Oh what a fun game!
AGW will cause …
Snow in my back yard
A descending night
Hunger
My cooking of a meal
Number Watch is a very good place to check in occasionally.

Many tech bloggers absolutely hate April fools day. It is a day that is useless for reporting on the high tech / computer industry because of the mixture of nonsense, or rather April fools jokes, as nonsense is what warmests produce every day of the year. Fortunately for many tech bloggers today, they are busy traveling to the Microsoft Build conference which starts tomorrow:
http://channel9.msdn.com/Events/Build/2014

Gary Pearse

What is this Ship of Fools Day everyone is talking about? I heard the joke was performed by a crew from the U of NSW in Antarctic waters late last year and early this year. It was a gas. They are going to have a hard time besting this gag.

gnomish
Don

TobiasN, I am sorry for your loss.
Sincerely,
Don

Report from IPCC’s April fools day conference in Yokohama by Marty Feldman http://youtu.be/ICE6l-5qTYE

That sound you hear is not the earth exploding. It is the sound of billions of skeptics breaking out in explosive laughter.
John

clipe

This article links to Donna Quixote’s ” Updated list” of things caused by global warming.
http://business.financialpost.com/2014/03/31/terence-corcoran-climate-changing-get-used-to-it-ipcc-report-says/
http://linkis.com/wp.me/uQESG

Old England

I thought this quote from ‘The Belgarian’ (p 396 paperback) very appropriate and worthy of passing on:
“There’s no rational explanation for their beliefs, so they’re free to speak without benefit of logic, untroubled by petty concerns such as truth or even plausibility.”
This is in reference to ‘religious fanatics’ but to me it sums up warmists and their unfounded, and thus ‘religious’ beliefs based solely on faith (or burning desire as the case may be), justified without concern for truth or plausibility, pretty accurately.

Only 6 weeks or so away from the 3rd Adaptation of Futures Conference. http://www.igbp.net/news/news/news/2014climateadaptationfuturesconferenceannounced.5.19895cff13e9f675e25492.html
Only one of the many reasons I keep pushing the IPCC interest in social sciences, education, and action research. They really intend to implement desired policies without a research base. The research is observing the effects.

Cold in Wisconsin

Human methane emissions to be regulated: every human to be fitted and required to wear an anal cork.

noaaprogrammer

Has anyone heard of the Norse explorer, Loof Lirpa, who is said to have found the Northwest Passage during an exceptionally ice-free summer around the turn of the previous millennium?

JBirks

When your credibility has sunk to the level of self-parody, it’s time to prepare for richly deserved oblivion.

Gary in Erko

Global warming is causing earth to expand which is accelerating the earth’s rotational velocity. By the year 2197 scientists have calculated that days will shorten to 22 hours and 37 minutes and the length of the year will be 383 days.

 D C   

No, it was the world that was fooled by climatologists, but not for much longer …
The argument that planets are still cooling off, or are somehow generating internal energy that maintains their existing temperature is not valid because …
(1) Every planet cools on its dark side at a rate which could easily have enabled it to cool right down (even in its core) to about the temperature supported by any external radiation. Venus cools about 5 degrees in 4 months, Earth cools by about 10 degrees in 12 hours etc. In other words, if the Sun existed but emitted no significant energy, it would appear that all planets in our Solar System could have cooled down close to absolute zero.
(2) So it must be energy from the Sun which is maintaining the existing temperatures on all planets and satellite moons, even down to their cores, and it must be doing so by raising the temperatures back up again by the amount equal to the cooling the night before. Why, for example, is the core of our Moon so much hotter than the surface ever is?
(3) Hence we require an explanation as to how the necessary energy gets into the lower troposphere, the surface and even below the surface of a planet or moon in order to maintain the current temperatures. In general, radiation from a colder atmosphere cannot actually add net thermal energy to a warmer surface and thus contribute to raising its temperature, because that would decrease entropy. This is established by the Second Law of Thermodynamics.
(4) The original NASA net energy budgets for Earth did not show radiative energy transfers by the atmosphere to the surface, but they then found that the radiation from the Sun alone does not explain the mean surface temperature when using Stefan-Boltzmann calculations. Such calculations are inappropriate anyway, because what is effectively “the surface” is a very thin layer (let’s say 1cm thick) and about 70% of this thin 1cm layer is transparent water. A black or gray body is not transparent by definition, and so S-B should not be applied to a thin 1cm layer of transparent water. The mean temperature of the ocean thermocline (all of which is absorbing the solar radiation but not back radiation) is about 8 to 10 degrees below the mean surface temperature.
(5) Whilst for Earth climatologists and IPCC authors then claimed to overcome this shortage of direct solar radiation by adding back radiation, you cannot possibly imagine that this would “work out” on Venus. Such back radiation cannot participate in any raising of the temperature of the Venus surface and, even if you think it could, you would have to explain how it could be over 16,000 watts per square meter, somehow multiplying the energy in the incident solar radiation (20 watts per square meter at the surface) by nearly 1,000-fold. If you shine a light such that it reflects multiple times between parallel mirrors, do you create more energy? That is what the radiative greenhouse conjecture is implying can happen with radiation back and forth between the surface and the atmosphere.
(6) Between the base of the nominal Uranus troposphere and the TOA there is a mean thermal gradient which is very close to the usual calculated value (for the “Dry adiabatic lapse rate”) which is the negative quotient of the acceleration due to gravity and the weighted mean specific heat of the gases. On Venus (as on Earth) the effective (environmental) lapse rate (thermal gradient) is reduced by about 25% to 35% by inter-molecular radiation between carbon dioxide molecules on Venus, and water molecules on Earth, together with some release of latent heat on Earth which may play a small part in producing the “wet adiabatic lapse rate” though not the major part. So, why is it so? Is it just a coincidence that the base of the nominal Uranus troposphere is 320K (hotter than Earth’s surface) which is just the right amount for the correct thermal gradient to exist in the 350Km of troposphere above, such that the temperature at the so-called radiating altitude is just right at around 60K? Likewise on Venus and other planets?

Steve Oregon

KevinM says:…….” Bloomburg bemoaning a baseball stadium that will be under water by 2100.”
They were talking about the risky tax funded public-private partnership venture to build the stadium.
Their feasibility projection wasn’t so hot. The debt servicing against expected revenue
forecast the project to ultimately be under water by 2100 and in need of replacement.
Staff recommended approval, city council approved the project and then moved on to the next agenda item. Climate Smart Communities policy.
You see when the nitwits are in charge they screw up everything.

Alan Robertson

Climate perplexed?
Here’s what to do…

GoreBull Warning is the opposite of those patent medicines sold by the smooth-talking salesman. Is there anything Dr. Fleecem’s Magical Elixir can’t cure? Is there anything CAGW can’t cause? Come to think of it, “Dr. Gore’s Carbon Offsets” sound awfully like a Magical Elixir.

ch

Inverse proportionality law of warmism.
The noise level of alarmism increases as evidence decreases.

global warming is destroying April Fools Day.

LOL! DO not forget to add it to the list. Arbor day is next as freezing people will cut down all the trees (see: Haiti) in order to stay warm when the windmills fail.

Alan Robertson

News Flash!
Climate disruption to wipe out humanity by midnight!
Third World countries hardest hit

JohnWho

The earth exploded and everyone died!
Why wasn’t I informed? Was it on the news?

 Doug C   

 
The blog for genuine climate science discussion and a $5,000 reward …
See this blog for more detail, and feel free to discuss anything with me there. No spammers reproducing AGW “science” please – I know what they claim, OK?
 

In other news…
CLIMATE SCIENCE ABANDONS SCIENCE
Merges with field of Political Science instead
News at 11

clipe
clipe
clipe

“Tsunami waves up to 1.8 meters high struck the coast of Chile after the U.S. Geological Survey reported a magnitude 8.2 earthquake about 95 kilometers off the country’s northern coast.”
http://www.bloomberg.com/news/2014-04-01/tsunami-alert-issued-after-magnitude-8-0-quake-off-chile-coast.html

Alan Robertson

clipe says:
April 1, 2014 at 5:58 pm
No fooling! Massive 8.0 (8.2?) earthquake off the coast of Chile.
_______________________
There’s a lot of that going around. We’ve all heard of the latest SOCal quakes around LA and even the Yellowstone caldera has been shaking a bit. Here in central Oklahoma, we’ve had at least 27 quakes over magnitude 2.5 in the past two weeks.

Thanks, A., Roy. 😉

” Bloomburg bemoaning a baseball stadium that will be under water by 2100.”
===========
show me a baseball stadium that hasn’t been torn down long before 90 years to make room for something else. where are those 90 year old stadium everyone flocks to?
the entire CAGW alarm is based on the idea that people are too stupid to get out of their own way, so they will gladly pay a tax to Al Gore and his cronies to do it for them.
After all, Al Gore invented CAGW, so it we pay him he will make it go away. Please Al, save us from the Bogeyman.
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Bogeyman

@ferdberple – Fenway & Wrigley.

M Seward

I hate to go all biblical, but since Noah has been coopted to the CAGW “Cause” it seems to me a far better explanation for CAGW and its latest burst of doomsaying is the story about the Tower of Babel. That said, I think if Solar 25 delivers what similar solar quiet times have delivered in the past then these loons are not babbling as they get closer to Heaven but closer to the Hell of global cooling and that pitchfork up the ass feeling that they were so horribly, horribly wrong. If history remembers them as mere fools they will be let off very, very lightly. I feel sorry for their kids. Who would want to advertise they studied under them at university.

Well I’ve said this before, do not EVER try to parody these people, or political correctness in general. Ridicule, yes, but parody, no. No stupidity, no cruelty, no evil, is too extreme for them to try to actually do it. All parody does is get in the way of exposing their real evils as and when they attempt them. And they’ll hold up your parody and say “See, they’re telling lies.” Then see what a quagmire you’re in trying to explain to onlookers that, no, this was a parody, but, yes, that was really them being too stupid for words…

Latitude

I like…..
GLOBAL WARMING DESTROYED OBAMACARE

pat

on google news homepage, below the following link. google has related news for:
climate change denial – conspiracy theories – climate change
2 April: SMH: Peter Hannam: ‘Conspiracist’ climate change study withdrawn amid legal threats
Climate change academics say the decision by a publisher to retract their paper examining the links between conspiracy theorists and denial of global warming because of legal threats could have a “chilling effect” on research.
Frontiers in Psychology last month retracted the paper, Recursive fury: Conspiracist ideation in the blogosphere in response to research on conspiracist ideation “in light of a small number of complaints”, the Swiss-based journal said on its website.
It means that if a paper is published that the climate deniers don’t like the look of, they can bombard the journal with complaints or threats A year-long investigation “did not identify any issues with the academic and ethical aspects of the study,” it said. However, the probe found “the legal context (to be) insufficiently clear”.
The paper, though, is being carried by the website of the University of Western Australia (UWA), where one of its authors, cognitive scientist Stephan Lewandowsky, was based…
“Sadly, it has turned into a routine for outsiders with no scientific standing to approach, bully, or intimidate journals, editors, and academics,” said Professor Lewandowsky, now at the UK’s University of Bristol.
One person commenting on the Frontiers’ website asked for the ‘‘full details of the investigation,’’ saying the paper had been ‘‘derogatory and insulting’’ by naming people as conspiracy theorists who were ‘‘merely pointing out errors in the previous paper’’…
John Cook, a researcher at the University of Queensland and a co-author of the second paper, said the Frontiers’ decision to retract the work might have a “chilling effect” on research.
“It means that if a paper is published that the climate deniers don’t like the look of, they can bombard the journal with complaints or threats,” Mr Cook said.
“Knowing they have had success once might embolden them to try to retreat the strategy again.” (Mr Cook also helms the Skeptical Science website.)
Kim Heitman, a lawyer for the UWA, said the university had done its own risk analysis before publishing the paper online. “There’s no reason to take it down,” Mr Heitman said.
The university had also received complaints from some groups. “It’s quite relentless,” he said.
“There’s always a close interest in everything that Steve (Lewandowsky) does,” Mr Heitman said. “We are conscious that we are going to be targeted by people opposed to his works.”
The university, though, had also received plaudits from around the world for its decision to publish the paper.
“I couldn’t list them,” Mr Heitman said. “And I wouldn’t list them, having regard to the fact that anyone who issues a ‘thanks UWA’ will probably get their own enquiry.”
http://www.smh.com.au/environment/climate-change/conspiracist-climate-change-study-withdrawn-amid-legal-threats-20140402-35xao.html

pat

new report – living in dreamland:
2 April: Fairfax Brisbane Times: Reuters: Far deeper emission cuts needed to curb climate change: draft IPCC report
The world will need far tougher curbs on greenhouse gases, by both developed nations and emerging economies, to keep global warming from exceeding a promised ceiling, a draft UN report shows.
Rich nations led by the United States would have to halve their emissions by 2030 from 2010 levels to keep warming below an agreed 2 degree Celsius ceiling above pre-industrial times, according to the draft obtained by Reuters.
***Asia, including China and India, would have to limit emissions to around 2010 levels by 2030 as part of a global shareout, a tough goal for countries that say they need to burn more fossil fuels to help end poverty…
The Berlin report about solving climate change follows an IPCC report about impacts of warming issued in Japan on Monday that said the world was in many cases ill-prepared for severe and perhaps irreversible change…
“The implications for all the big emitters are pretty stark,” said Alden Meyer, of the Union of Concerned Scientists. “All of them now have something to worry about.” Like others interviewed, he had not seen the draft…
http://www.brisbanetimes.com.au/environment/climate-change/far-deeper-emission-cuts-needed-to-curb-climate-change-draft-ipcc-report-20140402-35×56.html

Globull warming spreads corals around, according to the models, using cyclones. It’s models all the way: http://pindanpost.com/2014/04/02/cyclones-are-an-environmental-benefit/
From the UWA and CSIRO so they must be right/sarc

pat

final para of the reuters report on the new report!
“The IPCC says that it is at least 95 per cent probable that human activities, rather than natural variations in the climate, are the dominant cause of recent climate change. Opinion polls show that voters in many nations are far less certain.”

Brent Walker

Bill Leak, the cartoonist for The Australian newspaper summed it up. http://www.theaustralian.com.au/opinion/cartoons/photos-e6frg6zx-1226796005926?page=3
This even caused mirth among ardent warmists in Australia.

Eugene WR Gallun

As i have stated previously the missing heat is not being stored in the oceans but in the land. This extra energy has caused the speed of continental drift to increase dramatically. What with the ever increasing rise in carbon dioxide levels we can soon expect the continents to be moving as fast as motorboats.
Eugene WR Gallun

Fabi

As noted before, the cAGW crowd is putting The Onion out of business. Yet another previously unknown power of CO2.