UPDATE: co-author admits it is a “horrible mistake”, see below – Anthony
From the you’ve got to be effing kidding me department.
First, I apologize to my readers for the headline. Read on and I think you’ll see it is justified. The headline is paraphrased from the article and the paper to give you the flavor. I have reproduced the passage used by the Guardian and provided a link to the full paper below.
First, the Guardian story: (h/t to reader “a jones”)
Now the paper, peer reviewed and published in Acta Astronautica titled:
Would Contact with Extraterrestrials Benefit or Harm Humanity? A Scenario Analysis
Seth D. Baum,1 Jacob D. Haqq-Misra,2 & Shawn D. Domagal-Goldman3
1. Department of Geography, Pennsylvania State University.
2. Department of Meteorology, Pennsylvania State University
3. NASA Planetary Science Division
Acta Astronautica, 2011, 68(11-12): 2114-2129
Here’s the relevant passage:
A preemptive strike [from extraterrestrials] would be particularly likely in the early phases of our expansion because a civilization may become increasingly difficult to destroy as it continues to expand. Humanity may just now be entering the period in which its rapid civilizational expansion could be detected by an ETI because our expansion is changing the composition of Earth’s atmosphere (e.g. via greenhouse gas emissions), which therefore changes the spectral signature of Earth. While it is difficult to estimate the likelihood of this scenario, it should at a minimum give us pause as we evaluate our expansive tendencies.
Words fail me. Truly this is science fiction, and not the good kind. I have a feature called “Climate Craziness of the Week”, this may be the all time winner.
Read the entire paper here (PDF)
================================================================
UPDATE: Former Economist sci/tech reporter Oliver Morton chips in with this in comments, it seems a “horrible mistake” was made by the co-author. Still no word on how this passes peer review.
http://paleblueblog.org/post/9110304050/some-important-points-of-clarification
So here’s the thing. This isn’t a “NASA report.” It’s not work funded by NASA, nor is it work supported by NASA in other ways. It was just a fun paper written by a few friends, one of whom happens to have a NASA affiliation.
…
But I do admit to making a horrible mistake. It was an honest one, and a naive one… but it was a mistake nonetheless. I should not have listed my affiliation as “NASA Headquarters.” I did so because that is my current academic affiliation. But when I did so I did not realize the full implications that has. I’m deeply sorry for that, but it was a mistake born our of carelessness and inexperience and nothing more. I will do what I can to rectify this, including distributing this post to the Guardian, Drudge, and NASA Watch. Please help me spread this post to the other places you may see the article inaccurately attributed to NASA.
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These reasons would make more sense:
http://www.stantonfriedman.com/index.php?ptp=articles&fdt=2006.11.10&prt=2
http://www.telegraph.co.uk/news/newstopics/howaboutthat/ufo/8029045/Aliens-tried-to-warn-US-and-Russia-they-were-playing-with-fire-during-Cold-War.html
http://www.stantonfriedman.com/index.php?ptp=articles&fdt=2006.11.10
http://www.stantonfriedman.com/
I’ve got my pair of old Klipsch Hereseys pointed towards the sky and my Slim Whitman records cued up. I’m ready for the little green bastards, by god.
If they’re gonna be that pissed off about co2, think of what they’ll do when they find out some of the other things we’ve done. Quick, hide the history books…..
@ur momisugly Pat 5:48
How, exactly, does a frog know to move 15 ft north every day? Is not the temperature 15 ft north, south, east and west exactly the same temperature as “home?” What would encourage the frog to move? And how would said frog know which direction (north) would be “cooler?” Inquiring minds want to know….
@ur momisugly Rational Debate 4:44
Thanks for setting me straight. I didn’t realize that my thought processes were so far divorced from…uhm… “reality.” Or something.
This goes along with my theory that NASA has been infiltrated by aliens. Ah, and never apologize for using craptastic in a sentence. I just added it to my WordPress dictionary.
I wonder if we can start a charitable fund to help these “scientists” get the help they need and to refund any grant monies that may have gone into their education. No reason this story can’t have a happy ending.
Greg Bone,
Obviously you’ve been keeping up with the latest and best research over at http://timecube.com/
And of course if aliens did reach Earth they would entirely stay away from humans who can’t even agree on the temperature of their own planet.
I hear the theme music from The Twilight Zone in my head . . .
After reviewing the drivel on broadcast TV, I’m sure the aliens will conclude there is no intelligent life on earth. Gilligan’s Island may have unintentionally saved humanity.
Ignobel for Nasa!
So let me get this straight, Mr. Hawking–you’re saying these aliens exist in massive ships, so they’ve obviously got the technology to build on a grand scale and get said structures launched and across immense distances, meaning they’re very technologically advanced. They must know how to obtain and refine metals like iron to make steel, as well as aluminum, from their home planet. If their home planet is anything like Earth (elemental composition: iron (32.1%), oxygen (30.1%), silicon (15.1%), magnesium (13.9%), sulfur (2.9%), nickel (1.8%), calcium (1.5%), and aluminium (1.4%); with the remaining 1.2% consisting of trace amounts of other elements) certainly they’d have a VAST resource base (“bazillions of tons doesn’t even come close”) from which to build their space ships, their cities, their industrial complexes WITHOUT having to fly half way across the galaxy, spending hundreds if not thousands of years in the journey, just to pick on little ol’ Earth without having first gobbled up some extremely metal-rich meteoriods along the way.
No, Mr. Hawking, you’re brilliant in your chosen field but I’m afraid what you’d said above is laughable for the reasons I’ve stated. (Apparently, Mr. Hawking isn’t the only one out of his depth on this one. He’s apparently joined by Messers Baum, Haqq-Misra, and Domagal-Goldman and all their “peer reviews”, too.)
I reckon I have seen that face on the right side of the picture (at gunpoint) before. Isn’t that guy… James Hansen?
Any alien life form that could detect this would have, pretty much by definition, reached the Kurzweil Singularity. Since time stops there, I doubt that they would give a flying **** what we are up to – other than for comedic value.
This pretty well puts paid to the idea that “Peer Review” is some sort of gold standard doesn’t it.
They have entered loony bin territory. All I can think of is net.
These guys must be sceptics out to ridicule the agw crowd.
Imagine: Aliensare flying by and catch an Al Gore rant. They completely stop their flight and see that Earth science is bogged down with this meme. They send a message to over all transmission modes: “We also used to believe in the same garbage science and it cost us 100 years of progress over disease, famine, and technological advances. Run away from these kooks!”
Classic projection. They want to kill us (No Pressure), so they figure the little green guys will too.
What idiots.
When we first go to other solar systems, I hope our people carry thermo-nuclear weapons, just in case. And, if they encounter alians, the first question that needs to be answered is “are they carrying thermo-nuclear weapons?”
Craptastic. Someone should inform the Oxford Dictionary people about this wonderful new word.
The self-hatred toward humanity shown by liberals and greens is a serious issue.
I would suggest, as a mental illness, it’s a reason to excuse oneself from public discourse.
Another good reason that we need to establish a base on the moon. We can send these scientists to “keep a lookout for the aliens”. Just make sure the real astronauts don’t have to bunk with them.
Well honestly I don’t find this scientific peer-reviewed research in the least bit surprising because clearly these aliens already walk and talk among us and are hell bent on destroying our civilisation. Wake up and smell these aliens deniers! To the naked eye they appear just like you and I but beneath their external subterfuge these intergalactic chameleons are very dangerous green aliens. Be alert and once detected always approach them with extreme caution as they’re known devourers of grey matter and will latch on and suck your sweetbreads dry if you drop your guard and get too close to any of them. An excruciating, hallucinogenic and agonising death as the Big Bang slowly fades with a whimper.
….or maybe they’re just setting us up so they can say something like:
It’s about time you get the joke…..we were just kidding all along about this Global Warming Stuff……you mean you thought we were serious?
Robert of Ottawa,
Any aliens capable of visiting the Earth are far, far ahead of us technologically. And as Arthur C. Clarke said, any sufficiently advanced technology is indistinguishable from magic.
If, at the beginning of the industrial revolution only 150 years ago, a U.S. nuclear powered aircraft carrier had appeared, it could easily have destroyed the entire world’s wooden ship navies, and capitals, no problem.
If an alien entity appeared here, it would be much more advanced than the example given above. Thus, we are totally at the mercy of any advanced entity. It’s entirely their call.
But we can make plans to deflect continent-threatening asteroids, using only a tiny part of all the monies wasted on the CAGW scam.