Spoofing the climate of news

Heh. Everybody gets equal treatment in this parody of the state of climate change. When you step back and look at it all, it is pretty funny. -A

New Study Suggests News Climate Is Warming

A new study suggests that the IPCC is losing 10% of it’s credibility mass every month, and could have completely disappeared by Christmas.

“It’s shrinking faster that we thought” said Anthony Watts the renowned skeptical blogger, who led a small team of dedicated bloggers, analysing over 10,000 news articles and blogs on the Internet. “Not one of them contained the phrase ‘The IPCC is innocent'”, explained Mr. Watts, “Not even their unofficial web-site RealClimate.org

Intrepid Spoof reporters sought comments worldwide. Dr. Rajendra K. Pachauri, the eminent Himalayan glacier expert, was interviewed as he emerged from his hairdresser’s salon in downtown Delhi. “It’s a travesty!” he exclaimed, “I have newspaper cuttings and a 1988 photograph to prove it”.

Dr. Pachauri posed for photographs before he continued. “There was just one small error” he explained. “They wrote their reports in English. If they’d used Sanskrit, none of this would have happened”.

Dr. Pachauri spoke briefly to other reporters before posing for more photographs, and was then whisked off in his motorcade to a special meeting of the Railway Engineers Society of India, where he’s to be given a lifetime service award.

AGW skeptic Viscount Monckton of Brenchley commented “It doesn’t surprise me – if you’re striving for a New World Order you can expect a few minor scandals, though they’ve had a lot of major goofs. There’s probably a world lecture tour in this for me – privately, I’m laughing my socks off”.

This reporter sought out climate expert Dr. James Hansen in his office, surrounded by computer screens, charts and bottles of Tipp-ex and Liquid Paper.

Read the rest at The Spoof

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62 thoughts on “Spoofing the climate of news

  1. Funny! This is right up our alley!
    Rob Hanson of the Chrislip Journal
    Making America laugh politely since August 20th

  2. Funny. Off topic, have you been watching the ice in the Arctic? Seems to be growing past it’s usual seasonal climax.

  3. How could they reach James Hansen? He is such a busy body supervising all the temps he hired that were unemployed after ACORN shut down. It takes a lot of dilligent helpers to respond to all the FOIA requests. Quickly and cheerfully.

  4. I agree – it is funny and a credit to its author.
    I am a bit worried, though, that there’s probably plenty of people out there in the wide, wide world who will believe (selected) bits of it!!
    OT but have you seen the news from France with the President scrapping the country’s proposed carbon tax proposals?
    Charlie

  5. The quality of stories at The Spoof can be very uneven, but this one is savagely funny. Politically subversive irreverence at its best, IMO. Looks like it was penned by someone who pays close attention to WUWT. I gave it a well-deserved 5-star rating.
    (I don’t advise anyone to read it with a mouth full of food, however).
    And the headline in “Related Stories” about Pamela Anderson is a scream.

  6. Alice’s Restaurant Anyone?-
    “We walked in, sat down, Obie came in with the twenty seven eight-by-ten
    color glossy pictures with circles and arrows and a paragraph on the back of each one, sat down. Man came in said, “All rise.” We all stood up,and Obie stood up with the twenty seven eight-by-ten color glossy pictures, and the judge walked in sat down with a seeing eye dog, and he sat down, we sat down. Obie looked at the seeing eye dog, and then at the twenty seven eight-by-ten color glossy pictures with circles and arrows and a paragraph on the back of each one, and looked at the seeing eye dog. And then at twenty seven eight-by-ten color glossy pictures with circles and arrows and a paragraph on the back of each one and began to cry, ’cause Obie came to the realization that it was a typical case of American blind justice, and there wasn’t nothing he could do about it, and the judge wasn’t going to look at the twenty seven eight-by-ten color glossy pictures with the circles and arrows and a paragraph on the back of each.”

  7. Finally, a global warming discussion at my comfort level.
    (except for the reference to Tipp-ex)

  8. This really brightened my day. I also loved the IMWP. Is the Dulles Airport temprature sensors at the engine test site? I heard it was in the new furnace room, which put there when they did the latest expansion.

  9. Steve Goddard (10:20:52) :
    “The Inconvenient Warm Period” deserves nomination for quote of the week.

    I don’t know. “Little Ice Age Redaction” is pretty good.

  10. From the article:
    ” Dr. Phil Jones, of the now infamous Climatic Research Unit of the University of East Anglia, who played a major role in the meltdown, said “I’d comment, but why should I when all you want to do is publish what I say?”
    Too funny!

  11. –“What did the Vikings know? They couldn’t even write, let alone submit an article to a mainstream journal. I’ve just proved that the last decade was the warmest since NOAA’s flood, and that the Arctic saw record temperatures, using interpolated gridded data based on minimal evidence. I’m currently working on LIAR – that’s Little Ice Age Redaction, and I’ll show you my work in progress” Hansen said, knocking over a bottle of correcting fluid as he reached for a large chart. —
    I thought it was a spoof?

  12. Sinclair users doth protest making sport of the ZX-80. I built a ZX-81 from a kit and worked damn well, (anyone remember the ‘Vu-Calc’ spreadsheet?). Even the Ohio Scientific ‘Super Board II’ I had before the ZX-81 could have handled the simplistic ‘modeling’ that the IPCC hangs its hat on, (heck it even had 4K of RAM!).

  13. The Australian weather monitoring pictures on surfacestations.org converted 6 people in my office and my girlfriend into dyed-in-the-wool deniers in a matter of minutes!
    “is this a spoof site?”. “it’s like a conspiracy”.”but surely they aren’t basing their results on sites like these”.”how can they get away with this?” were just a few of the choicer quotes.

  14. Re: Mike M (11:44:29) :
    Sinclair users doth protest making sport of the ZX-80. I built a ZX-81 from a kit and worked damn well, (anyone remember the ‘Vu-Calc’ spreadsheet?)

    I remember those days. Waking up xmas morning to find my 16K RAM pack and wondering what I’d do with all that memory! Experience of that got me my first contract reverse engineering and documenting Z80 controllers in a steelworks. Also taught me to write tight code, so saved money on hardware in future years.
    Thing about climate models though is you programme them with what you know, and then they confirm your belief for you.

  15. Comedy gold – thanks for posting this. As I tell my employees and coworkers, sometimes you have to laugh or cry about things – I choose to smile 🙂
    Cheers!

  16. Brutally funny. Who knew those pawns of Big Oil had a sense of humor?
    The material here is boundless. Something contrasting the dire predictions of imminent polar bear extinction versus their all time high populations offers lots to work with – in a Monty Python ‘dead parrot’ skit kind of way.
    Or perhaps something comparing IPCC peer review to a pack of Pavlovian dogs, or even better, Pavlovian sheep.
    And although this wild and crazy TV evangelist is barely known outside of Canada, there’s got to be some humor in this:
    February 10, 2008: “What I would challenge you to do is to put a lot of effort into trying to see whether there’s a legal way of throwing our so-called leaders into jail because what they’re doing is a criminal act,” said Dr. Suzuki, a former board member of the Canadian Civil Liberties Association. “It’s an intergenerational crime in the face of all the knowledge and science from over 20 years.”
    Yes, the “Canadian Civil Liberties Association.” Liberty for all who think correctly.

  17. I am now miffed when I read this spin that the AGW fools have made one of their major talking points.
    “In recent years, the corporate PR campaign has gone viral, spawning a denial movement that is distributed, decentralized and largely immune to reasoned response,” the group said.’
    In recent years, the Crowd Sourcing PR campaign has gone viral, spawning a denial movement that is distributed, decentralized and largely immune to un-reasoned response,” I said.
    There, fixed it for ya.

  18. Al Gored (12:24:55) :
    Dr. Suzuki, a former board member of the Canadian Civil Liberties Association. “It’s an intergenerational crime in the face of all the knowledge and science from over 20 years.”
    Dr.SH (show business) Suzuki: You are right, your subconscious mind betrayed you: It is “an intergenerational crime”, but you should study history, since all this really began during the French Revolution. The descendants of those who funded the FR are the ones after all this, just to keep speculative ways of making money instead of working, as it used to be until then. The liberal state was borned, read Rosseau:
    http://www.infed.org/thinkers/et-rous.htm
    All citizens should participate – and should be committed to the general good – even if it means acting against their private or personal interests. For example, we might support a political party that proposes to tax us heavily (as we have a large income) because we can see the benefit that this taxation can bring to all. To this extend, Rousseau believed that the good individual, or citizen, should not put their private ambitions first.
    Dig and find the source of all.

  19. …”A new study suggests that the IPCC is losing 10% of it’s credibility mass every month, and could have completely disappeared by Christmas.”
    You guys can laugh all you want…but what are you gonna say when it turns out to be true?
    This is why I support Laugh & Trade.

  20. Dinjo (10:51:39) :
    At the end of the 1st sentence I had made a decision that I wouldn’t eat or drink anything until I finished reading, (and for some time afterwards owing to flashbacks). 🙂
    DaveE.

  21. This Spoof is not peer reviewed! Clearly it is funded by Big Oil, tobacco magnates, the Creationists … All man the barricades of Science at once … Get Pachauri back from his hero’s amorous adventures upon the glaciers … Get Ehrlich and tell him this is no time to be s***scared … I almost reached a tipping point (from my chair) … quick, a Nature editiorial may quench the flames of insurrection before they cause too much warming …
    As someone down here in Oz once said, sometimes the truth isn’t just stranger than fiction, it’s also funnier.

  22. “What did the Vikings know?”
    http://theozarkmountains.com/ozark_mountains.htm
    …Midden deposits in the shelters and caves yield corn cobs, projectile points, bones of food animals and the burials themselves. Some caves have deposits as deep as seventeen feet, indicating thousands of years of occupation.
    The Indian population was always sparse in this area with never more than one or two families living in any one place. No large villages are found and little or no evidence is noted of warfare. These were simple people living a subsistence life.
    Hernando DeSoto was the first European to enter Arkansas, doing so in June of 1541. Although he never saw the Ozarks, he inquired of the Tunica Indians (whom he met at a village near the city of Parkin) and was told by them that the area to the north and west was sparsely populated by a nomadic people and that it was a cold climate.
    The Ozark’s Indians had, for the most part, abandoned this area long before the Europeans arrived due to a long period of drought that existed around the year 1200. This dry period may have lasted for over one hundred years. Remnants of clothing found in the top layers of the dry bluff shelters in Newton and surrounding counties are made from Yucca fibers, a desert dwelling plant. A dry climate would indicate difficulty in growing corn and the migration of wild animals to other areas. The people simply moved away, seeking a better life, leaving their abandoned homes for modern man to explore and ponder centuries later….

    The Ozark Mountains sure aren’t a desert environment now. They are covered by large tracts of forest and contain plenty of water. But these Indians couldn’t submit an article to a mainstream journal, so…

  23. Mike M (11:44:29) :
    Even the Ohio Scientific ‘Super Board II’ I had before the ZX-81 could have handled the simplistic ‘modeling’ that the IPCC hangs its hat on, (heck it even had 4K of RAM!).
    Hey that was my first PC ! I used it to do engineering calculations and even hooked it up to a EPROM programmer by soldering to the circuit board pads under the 6502.
    It was very useful for years.

  24. Very well done.
    Hopefully, Dr. Jones had better luck finding his car keys than he did finding … well, you know.

  25. This study is fawlty: at a 10% loss per month, by Christmas its credibility mass would only be down to .387420489 of the original value. In fact, its credibility can never actually reach zero, just approach it. 🙂

  26. The sad thing is it contains more facts and less invention than the MSM. Great read, thank you for that.

  27. I always say a good joke is always in good taste.
    Well, except for that one about the Duke, the snake charmer and the champagne bottle.
    Oh, and the one about the vicar’s daughter and the rabbits, and the one about the nuns and the lebrechauns…
    Okay, most good jokes are in good taste. Except the ones that aren’t.
    The eco-enquirer satire is fun though.
    http://www.ecoenquirer.com/poll-results.htm

  28. The ‘Spoof’ article, at the end, states that it’s entirely fictitional. But you know what? After observing the antics of these people I’ve come to
    The conclusion that this is the most accurate reporting I’ve ever read about global warming.

  29. The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious. The Spoof
    “Requesting immediate take down. These people have infringed my disclaimer!” Gavin Schmidt, RC

  30. (Not a “spoof”.)
    “he [Professor Francisco Ayala] said. “The scientific fundamentalism proposed by Dawkins implies a materialistic view of the world. But once science has had its say, there remains much about reality that is of interest. Common sense tells us that science can’t tell us everything.””
    Say Amen, Al.
    Amen Al.
    …-
    “Winner of £1m Templeton prize attacks ‘fundamentalism’ of Dawkins
    The “scientific fundamentalism” promoted by the atheist Richard Dawkins was criticised yesterday by the winner of a prize he had attacked.
    Professor Francisco Ayala, who won the £1 million Templeton Prize for scientific thought, said that attacking religion and ridiculing believers provided ammunition for religious leaders who insisted that followers had to choose between God and Darwin. “Richard Dawkins has been a friend for more than 20 years, but it is unfortunate that he goes beyond the boundaries of science in making statements that antagonise believers,” he said.
    Professor Ayala, of the University of California, Irvine, who is an authority on evolution and genetics, won the prize for his contribution to the question “Does scientific knowledge contradict religious belief?”. The prize, the largest of its kind, was founded by the late entrepreneur Sir John Templeton to honour scientists who contribute to progress in religion.
    The professor, who was born in Spain and is a naturalised American, says science and religion cannot be in contradiction because they address different questions. It is only when either subject oversteps its boundary, as he believes is the case with Professor Dawkins, that a contradiction arises, he said. “The scientific fundamentalism proposed by Dawkins implies a materialistic view of the world. But once science has had its say, there remains much about reality that is of interest. Common sense tells us that science can’t tell us everything.””
    http://www.timesonline.co.uk/tol/news/science/politics/article7076580.ece

  31. Pete H (20:07:02) :
    “I wonder if Gavin’s readers will take it in the fun way we have?”
    May I? Thank you:
    I wonder if both of Gavin’s regular readers will take it in the fun way we have?
    Fixed!

  32. maz2 (18:28:44) :
    (Not a “spoof”.)
    (…)
    The professor, who was born in Spain and is a naturalised American, says science and religion cannot be in contradiction because they address different questions. It is only when either subject oversteps its boundary, as he believes is the case with Professor Dawkins, that a contradiction arises, he said. “The scientific fundamentalism proposed by Dawkins implies a materialistic view of the world. But once science has had its say, there remains much about reality that is of interest. Common sense tells us that science can’t tell us everything.””
    ——————-
    Reply:
    But what if God is the greatest scientist of them all?

  33. This spoof definitely has its merits, since it’s not always possible to educate and inform the masses, but you can certainly raise their awareness through entertainment. As Johnny Carson used to say “OK Ed, we’re on, let’s entertain the hell out of them”.

  34. I liked “the Darwin Regional Office for Non-Governmental Organisations (DRONGO)” – had to Google it to see if it actually exists. This piece was beautifully written. Thanks for the laugh, The Spoof and Anthony. I would put it on my office door, but it’s already plastered with the Curry statement and Eschenbach response, and lots of Climategate info – not sure enough people would get the jokes, either. A definite keeper, though!

  35. THANKS for the above post, I even went to the blog and read the whole thing.
    Put a smile on my face. 🙂

  36. Fantastic! Great way to start off the w/e.
    “the Darwin Regional Office for Non-Governmental Organisations (DRONGO)”
    Had me chuckling to myself for a while…he he he he…
    Thankyou Anthony.

  37. David Alan Evans (12:57:40) :
    Dinjo (10:51:39) :
    At the end of the 1st sentence I had made a decision that I wouldn’t eat or drink anything until I finished reading, (and for some time afterwards owing to flashbacks). 🙂

    Very wise. Unfortunately I was eating lunch at the time, hence the warning 😉

  38. Mike M (11:44:29) :
    Sinclair users doth protest making sport of the ZX-80. I built a ZX-81 from a kit and worked damn well…

    Ah, the Sinclair ZX81! (cue nostalgic violins), my first computer. It had a whole 1K of RAM, incredibly irritating rubber keys, you had to plug it into the telly to see anything and could only store your data on a cassette player, which took forever and sometimes failed, but it had a workable BASIC and was good enough for me to learn how to program on. The 16K RAM add-on cost nearly as much as the computer itself and had to be propped up with a piece of cardboard because if you sneezed it came out and you lost hours of work, which was great fun. I learned very early on not to bang the desk every time I got a syntax error 😉

  39. And in other somewhat related and – slightly to considerably (depending on your perspective) – more serious news … have I got a graph for you!
    There are 44 Chapters in AR 4, each of which has “References” for the citations in the body of the chapter. 40 of the 44 Chapters contain details of material not published until 2007.
    I think this must have been a remarkable feat on the part of the Reviewers (who, according to the IPCC schedule, were to have completed their work by mid-Sept. 2006)
    Short version: AR4 contains no less than 354 giant leaps back to the future. Read all about it at:
    http://hro001.wordpress.com/2010/03/26/ipccs-4th-assessment-report-354-leaps-back-to-the-future/

  40. I just didn’t realise what an impact my little satire would have! This is my first effort on The Spoof – I knocked it up in about an hour on Tuesday evening, and searched for a suitable site to post it on – The Spoof seemed the best – it’s got a feature-full “writers desk” for anyone who’s interested in venting their spleen through satire – just like a mini-word processor.
    I’m gratified, humbled and astonished at the response (and privately laughing my socks off).
    I think I’ll go and have a lie down…..

  41. BTW AlGore’s houseboat really IS named “B.S.One” meaning “Bio-Solar One” (I guess he just didn’t make the connection), and it IS berthed at Hurricane Marina in Smithville, Tennessee!
    I don’t make this stuff up…..

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