Green Sin Week – your personal guide to penance

Mocking Lent, Good Friday, and Easter observed by millions, the eco website “Grist” this week showed the link between all things green and religion, by making a “virtual confession booth” for those who have sinned against Gaia.

Apparently, there’s been lots of green sinning going on during the last week of Lent, leading up to Easter. Why, I’m sinning just using electricity for my PC to write this.

First NBC-Universal Networks and NBC News aligned themselves with Gaia by turning “bug” logos green this week on all of their channels, in deference to the green goddess Gaia. Even the famous color peacock logo got the treatment. Of course they’ve been doing that for a few years so that isn’t much news.

What is news however, is that one anchor was moved (perhaps by Grist) to actually confess “green sins” live on the air. Watch the video below and see what happened when I entered my own sins against Gaia.

Click to watch video

I’d like confess my sins. I drive a Chevy Tahoe…I often turn the water on in the shower, then I walk downstairs…I throw those bottles away without recycling…Those are my eco-sins. I’m confessing them to you because tomorrow is Earth Day

Given that I’ve been feeling less than holy myself this week, I decided to confess what many consider to be my biggest sin, writing about climate change and its associated failures. This is what I got after entering my “sin”:

Hmm, I’ve been called a lot of things, but never a “voracious parasite”. Funny thing is, we already have reusable grocery bags, animal friendly shampoo, and some weird twisty bulbs in our household. I even went the extra mile and put in LED fixtures.

I decided maybe my sin of running WUWT was just too complex for the sinning model they programmed into their database. After all, most of the images, charts, and graphs we post transcend religion and venture into the nether world of fact.

So I decided to ask myself: what is my most basic sin? If I were to equate to myself and Gaia of what was described as “original sin” of Adam and Eve, captured by Michelangelo below, what would it be?

File:Michelangelo Buonarroti 022.jpg
Michelangelo's painting of the sin of Adam and Eve (the Fall of Man) from the Sistene Chapel

In terms of Gaia and its inquisitors enforcers protectors, what would constitute “original sin”? It was a tough question. I pondered it awhile. I made some tea using some fossil fuel powered electricity and contemplated my sins of consumption perpetrated globally by the Lipton company and Pacific Gas and Electric. Then it hit me, like a bolt out of the green!

I had it, the basic most pure truth when it comes to sin against Gaia. I entered it into the GSS (the “Grist Sin System”) and here is what it told me:

Quite a screed for the original sin of “I exist”, at least self flagellation wasn’t needed.

If you wish to have a look at the GSS, you can try it yourself here. Many of the sins entered seem to be mocking Gaia though. Here’s a few that I noted:

04.24.2011 – I love horsepower more than I love the environment.

04.24.2011 – I wasted 30 seconds of my time looking at this website. Useless, but indicative of your entire stand on this issue.

04.24.2011 – I justify eating watermelon all year long by telling myself it’s always in season somewhere in the world.

04.24.2011 – I secretly like to hear reports that global warming isn’t real because it increases my sense of reality.

04.24.2011 – I know global warming is fake, but refuse to tell anyone because it upsets them so. Try it yourself. See what happens.

04.24.2011 – At the beach, I pee in the ocean like its my job.

04.24.2011 – I don’t buy organic because that shit’s expensive.

I urge readers to confess, and to also post confessions here at WUWT.

In related news, my local newspaper, the Chico Enterprise Record, seems to be “fed up” with all things green that are encapsulated as commandments mandates from the summit. They published this editorial during Earth week, a few excerpts of which I’ve posted below:

Our view: People will do what’s good for the Earth without the heavy hand of government regulation.

We’re doing what’s good for the Earth, because it’s also good for us. When good Earth-friendly products are available, Americans will embrace them.

But that’s not enough, apparently. In less than three years, you won’t have any alternative to the CFL, except for LED lights and whatever new-fangled thing comes down the pike by then. Because by January 2014, a federal ban on the incandescents will be complete. The ban started phasing in on Jan. 1 in California, which always likes to be first, followed by other states next January.

That’s the other thing that has changed since the first Earth Day. No one can deny we as a nation are more aware and more responsible. The simple fact that everyone recycles, which was a downright bizarre practice in 1970, may be the best indication of how far we’ve come.

But we’ve also seen the growth of a faction intoxicated by environmentalism. And when they reach the halls of power, they push their causes with arrogance, justifying it as the defense of Mother Earth. They know more than us, and don’t give us any credit.

So we end up with laws that tell us what to do —even as in the case of the CFLs, gas-efficient vehicles and recycling mandates —when it really isn’t necessary. We’re smart enough to do what’s good for us.

Perhaps we need a website for Greens to confess sins against humanity.

Oh, and when you click on the Grist “Still feeling Guilty?” link, you discover there’s a “Deep Throat follow the money moment” and you are urged to buy indulgences:

Was it ever about anything else?

h/t to climatequotes.com for posting in Tips and Notes

The climate data they don't want you to find — free, to your inbox.
Join readers who get 5–8 new articles daily — no algorithms, no shadow bans.
0 0 votes
Article Rating
117 Comments
Inline Feedbacks
View all comments
April 24, 2011 6:50 pm

I confessed my sin wherein I beat baby seals to death with the bumper of a 1966 GTO.
You can also have fun by signing up with fake email addresses, like lyingbastiches@hoax.com

007
April 24, 2011 6:54 pm

I love telling people it’s impossible to waste water, and then listening to their irrational response. I then explain the hydrological cycle, ask them ‘does a river waste water’, and finally explain that we don’t run low on water because we take long showers but because it doesn’t rain for a while. They either get it or they don’t.

April 24, 2011 6:56 pm

I noticed that the semi-illiterate writers of prayers wrote I “knowest that thou are pissed” instead of “I know that thou art pissed”.

April 24, 2011 6:56 pm

My sin: I went shopping for a polar bear rug. Mea culpa, mea culpa,
mea maxima culpa.

Howling Winds
April 24, 2011 7:27 pm

Anthony,
I guess that makes you the Devil in the greenies holy scripture? You are my favorite devil!

Howling Winds
April 24, 2011 7:32 pm

When I was a kid in South Carolina, say 12 years old, I discovered that if I put fire ants from one mound into a different mound, they would fight to the death. I would even bring in battalions from other mounds. Sometimes I would set the ants upon termites. I’m glad I got that off of my chest.

R. Shearer
April 24, 2011 7:35 pm

I used toilet paper, then I flushed it.

Mustafa
April 24, 2011 7:48 pm

To celebrate Earth Day, I drove my turbocharged Cadillac more than 750 miles enjoying the beauty of Northern Michigan and the budding greenery of Ohio in early spring. (Unfortunately, its still winter in Michigan.) The only sin was the $150 worth of gas it took because Obama won’t allow drilling for oil and EPA won’t allow the construction of new refineries.

jae
April 24, 2011 7:53 pm

My biggest sin: I confess that I believe that Gaia is nothing but a creepy pagan god. I personally believe in the real thing.
A lesser sin, I guess is that I don’t recycle anything but aluminum and paper/cardboard. It is simply STUPID from an environmental/ecological/gaia/economic/whatever/standpoint to recycle anything else; because YOU AND I are just subsidizing the subsidized (with my taxes) greenf–ks who are processing the other wastes. Landfills make much more sense, since we at least get methane from them, with which we can generate electricity!

Michael in Sydney
April 24, 2011 8:00 pm

Dear GAIA
My sin is most grevious and probably the most troubling to your converts because it means I am demonstrably insane and beyond redemption; I worship your creator rather than you, the creation.
However do I receive an indulgence as I did not have children which apparently is the MOST grevious sin?
Cheers
Michael

jorgekafkazar
April 24, 2011 8:07 pm

Those spirochete light bulbs have got to go.

jae
April 24, 2011 8:26 pm

Well, instead of confessing stuff, I would rather take the opportunity to PRAY that
God grants the majority of voting folks the wisdom to wake up and understand simply that the necessities of life includes ENERGY, in addition to food, clothing, and shelter. There are forces among us (maybe even the pagan Gaia??) who would try to diminish this important resource for some esoteric demon-driven reason. CAGW is a demonic construct, IMHO.

TWE
April 24, 2011 8:27 pm

I find that site pretty disgusting actually. It seems to be presented in a humorous way but there are plenty of delusional people who are very serious about its message. Easy to laugh at it but it really isn’t much of a joke.

chris y
April 24, 2011 8:29 pm

I fed clubbed baby seals to fatten up several polar bears before slaughtering them to make several tea cozies and a throw rug.

rbateman
April 24, 2011 8:36 pm

I ate a range-fed steak I cooked on the propane grill. Darn 5 gallons lasts for years at the rate I barbecue. Alas, the CO2 got away, and I am to blame.
I tried to bust down the tires on my Honda, but ran out of oomph, so I am going to commit another GAIA sin by visiting the garage this week.
And, grievous of all, we drove up to the lake to see it 93% full of GAIAs AGW water and gobs of snow smeared all over the Trinity Alps. There, we snapped pictures of the splendor using batteries charged off the power generated by evil ungreen hydro.
I’ll never catch up.

Andy G
April 24, 2011 8:39 pm

Isn’t it so often the way with religions, that those most in sin ask the rest to repent.
If they truly believe in Gaia, they should not be trying to sufficate the world’s plant.
Plants need CO2 to breath and live, but have been on starvation rations for a millenium.

Jim Clarke
April 24, 2011 8:54 pm

I once wore a t-shirt that said “Nuke the baby seals for Jesus!” I was protesting protesters. Gaia herself told me the shirt was pretty funny, but that was after a few beers. I wonder what the Grist people are drinking?
Thanks for the great column, Anthony. Gaia and I are glad you exist!

Don Horne
April 24, 2011 8:58 pm

I don’t need NO stinkin’ penitence !~! ..eleventy.. !~!~!

philincalifornia
April 24, 2011 9:04 pm

I carry planet-saver grocery bags in my car, but only remember to take them in the store 4 times out of 10.
I stop to think how unusual it is that this new trend of large, transparent plastic containers for spinach, lettuce and other salads has appeared in N. California fairly recently …
….. and then buy them anyway.

u.k.(us)
April 24, 2011 9:07 pm

Deadman says:
April 24, 2011 at 6:56 pm
I noticed that the semi-illiterate writers of prayers wrote I “knowest that thou are pissed” instead of “I know that thou art pissed”.
===========
In general defense of writers everywhere, watch where you are pissing!
Is a semi-literate prayer worth less than a literate prayer??

Lew Skannen
April 24, 2011 9:10 pm

When I took my flame thrower to the local park for a test run I drove out there in my SUV.
I could have used my Prius.
It was thoughtless of me…

Editor
April 24, 2011 9:18 pm

My confession:
I made a reservation to attend http://www.heartland.org/events/ICCC2011/index.html
Let’s see you guys equal that! 🙂

April 24, 2011 9:26 pm

Tomorrow, I will drive 10 miles, by myself, to my favorite Mexican restaurant. After returning home, I produce much gas and release to the atmosphere.

CRS, Dr.P.H.
April 24, 2011 9:28 pm

Bless me, Father, for I have sinned…..I farted in church, releasing a dreaded greenhouse gas with a greenhouse-gas equivalent of 21 CO2e!!
see TABLE A–1 TO SUBPART A OF PART 98—GLOBAL WARMING POTENTIALS
[100-Year Time Horizon]
http://www.cdphe.state.co.us/climate/TableA-1.pdf

Cecil Coupe
April 24, 2011 9:31 pm

I wonder if this an attempt by Grist is get a shout out from Sean Hannity in an attempt to improve Grist’s relevance. Some Catholics don’t like it when less faithful make up new saints for humor. That’s Hannity bait for sure. Grist should have a Saint Mohammed’s Radio cartoon card if they want to explore unintended consequences.