License Bidwell Ranch

I’m going to make a departure from my usual climate and science fare to make a comment on the local front.

In today’s Chico Enterprise Record, there was an editorial lamenting the huge budget crisis facing the city of Chico, thanks to uncontrolled spending beyond income. The editorial said: “…leaving jobs vacant and negotiating a cheaper benefits package for new employees are two obvious solutions at both the city and state level. That won’t solve the entire problem, but it’s a start — and certainly a vast improvement over the current strategy, which is to do nothing.”
 
There are two solutions to city budget problems; cut expenses and/or raise revenue. Raising revenue (taxes) when you’ve been a careless spender isn’t going to fly with the public, and cutting jobs is equally unpalatable. So what to do?

Raise revenue another way. For example, we have Bidwell Ranch, which is forever locked in an environmental land use limbo thanks to Fairy Shrimp and Meadowfoam. Of course selling it is tantamount to sacrilege, but what about licensing the name?

I submit to you, Bidwell Ranch Dressing:

bidewell_ranch_bottle.png

Now that’s a use for Bidwell Ranch

There’s lot’s of other things the City could license. Use your imagination folks.

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9 thoughts on “License Bidwell Ranch

  1. I propose a pick-it-yourself $$$$ medical marijuana plantation in upper park. BEC could organize and lead the volunteer effort to plant 40,000 hemp seedlings (native varieties of course).

    Chico would become the world leader in natural hemp hippy formal wear, Jute rope weaving, pharmaceutical brownie manufacturing…. and we can all get hella stoned in the process. Think globally, act locally.

    Its a win win win win venture!!!

    Peace out A-man !

  2. Or, you could have Bidwell Ranch be the name, and end up with the redundant “Bidwell Ranch ranch dressing.” But think about it, it would also open the door to “Bidwell Ranch ayahmend dressing” (that’s almond for those of you in the rest of the world) and “Bidwell Ranch Velveeta dressing” … sorry couldn’t resist a few Chicoville jokes.

  3. Departing from the licensing angle, how about products made from species living on Bidwell Ranch?

    Imagine a steaming bowl of canned Bidwell Ranch Fairy Shrimp Bisque topped with a generous sprinkle of fresh and tasty meadowfoam flower petals and coarse chopped meadowfoam greens.

    Dining on the “endangered” is always a special treat for the green so it should be quite a revenue generator in this town. Give it an upscale label and sell the bisque, flowers, and greens at Trader Joes.

    Dang, now I am hungry and Fairy Shrimp are out of season. But the meadowfoam is thriving. Time for a fresh meadowfoam and miner’s lettuce salad drenched with some of that Bidwell Ranch dressing.

    Meadowfoam seed oil is edible so it could be used as the base ingredient for Bidwell Ranch dressing. The oil is also highly prized for use in all-natural soaps, skin lotions, and bath products.

    How about a line of Bidwell Ranch all-natural hygiene and beauty products made from meadowfoam oil to keep processed chemical shunning green clean, comfortable, and smelling like a lush vernal pool? Made for greens but petro-chemical burning planet rapers love it too!

    If we really think big, meadowfoam seed oil could be used as an alternative fuel. Chico drivers running on meadowfoam oil would be a site that would bring a sentimental tear to my eye. Burning meadowfoam seed oil could help to wean us from our addiction to Mid-East Islamo-fascist thug oil. What is not to like about farming and harvesting Bidwell Ranch meadowfoam?

  4. I recently proposed a similar solution to NASA’s money problems: Corporate sponsorship of the Orbiters. Can’t you just picture Endeavour all decked out in stickers like a NASCAR racer? How much would Microsoft pay to have its butterfly logo on the nosecone? How about “Intel Inside” emblazoned right under the American flag on the vertical stab?

  5. Happy, happy Thanksgiving to you and yours, Rev.
    I know one thing I have to be thanksful for this year: You!

    “Use your imagination folks.”

    Why not do the same thing dubya did to stop-check a recession and skyrocket revenue to record levels?

    CUT TAXES!

    It’s the liberal thing to do.

  6. Our local paper, The Union, recently published an article that the County was “spending beyond income revenue.” Unfortunatly, after an audit by some folks smarter than the reporter, we found out it was not true. I hope the Chico Enterprise Record does not their facts straight either.

    I thought you all had some of those big box stores, WalMarts, Home Depots, etc that generated some big time tax revenue to keep the Chico coffers full to the brim, or are they all in the County?

    As I keep telling our local political leaders who have resisted the big box revenue opportunities and see the revenues declining as one third of every purchasing dollar is spend outside the County, “Use your imagination folks.” For them it is harder than you think. First they must to have an imagination, which is often not an election requirment.

    If the salad dressing thing works out, let us foothills folks know so we can come up with a Gold County BBQ sauce. The cooked goose is going to need some sauce “real soon now,” as we have billions of gold in the ground under the town, but a small group of wackos will not let us dig for it. No mining, no big box stores, no tax revenue, and a whole bunch of shoppers who go to the valley for their household goods, it is going to take some imagination to find the needed revenue. It may be a salad dressing or BBQ sauce solution.

  7. There’s your trouble. You had a golden goose there–until some tax-raising idiot done went and cooked it!

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