Mann on the DOE’s ‘A Critical Review of Impacts of Greenhouse Gas Emissions on the U.S. Climate’

Parody created by the Michael Mann AI rant generator.

THIS DOE “CRITICAL REVIEW” IS A DISGRACEFUL ATTEMPT TO UNDERMINE DECADES OF CLIMATE SCIENCE AND TO PROVIDE COVER FOR CONTINUED INACTION AND DENIAL! IT IS ASTONISHING—NO, IT’S INFURIATING—TO SEE A U.S. GOVERNMENT AGENCY SPREADING SUCH EGREGIOUS MISINFORMATION AND UNDERMINING THE URGENT MORAL IMPERATIVE TO ACT ON CLIMATE!

FIRST, THIS SO-CALLED “CLIMATE WORKING GROUP” IS STACKED WITH LONG-DISCREDITED VOICES WHOSE IDEAS HAVE BEEN CONSISTENTLY DEBUNKED BY MAINSTREAM SCIENCE. THESE AUTHORS—CHRISTY, CURRY, KOONIN, MCKITRICK, SPENCER—ARE NOTORIOUS FOR DOWNPLAYING THE SEVERITY OF CLIMATE CHANGE AND OBSCURING THE SCIENTIFIC CONSENSUS!

LET ME BE CLEAR: THEIR REPORT MISREPRESENTS THE IMPACT OF RISING CO2 LEVELS AS “GLOBAL GREENING,” WHILE IGNORING THE IMMENSE DAMAGE CAUSED BY EXTREME WEATHER EVENTS, INTENSIFIED BY CLIMATE CHANGE! THIS IS NOT SCIENCE—IT’S PROPAGANDA! WE ARE WITNESSING UNPRECEDENTED WILDFIRES, DEVASTATING FLOODS, RECORD-BREAKING HEATWAVES, AND MELTING POLAR ICE. EACH DAY OF DELAY IS A CRIME AGAINST HUMANITY, AND THIS REPORT IS COMPLICIT IN THAT CRIME!

THESE AUTHORS CYNICALLY ARGUE THAT EXTREME WEATHER IS NOT WORSENING—A CLAIM DIRECTLY CONTRADICTED BY REAL-WORLD DATA AND THE VAST MAJORITY OF CLIMATE SCIENTISTS WORLDWIDE. THEY CHERRY-PICK STATISTICS, IGNORING THE HUMAN SUFFERING AND ECONOMIC DISRUPTION CAUSED BY CLIMATE-INTENSIFIED EXTREMES. THIS IS NOT JUST SCIENTIFIC MALPRACTICE; IT’S MORALLY REPREHENSIBLE!

THE REPORT’S BLATANT DISMISSAL OF THE SERIOUSNESS OF OCEAN ACIDIFICATION AND THE MASSIVE DIE-OFF OF CORAL REEFS IS ANOTHER LEVEL OF IRRESPONSIBILITY. THE WORLD’S OCEANS ARE IN CRISIS, AND YET THEY CASUALLY WRITE OFF THE SCIENTIFIC EVIDENCE AS A “MISNOMER.” WHAT KIND OF FUTURE DO THEY IMAGINE ON A PLANET WITH DESTROYED MARINE ECOSYSTEMS AND COLLAPSED FISHERIES?

ON CLIMATE SENSITIVITY, THEY CHOOSE TO AMPLIFY UNCERTAINTIES WHILE IGNORING ROBUST EVIDENCE OF SERIOUS RISK. THEY FALSELY ASSERT THAT CLIMATE MODELS “RUN HOT,” IGNORING THAT MODELS HAVE ACTUALLY BEEN REMARKABLY ACCURATE IN PREDICTING OBSERVED WARMING TRENDS. THEIR AGENDA IS CLEAR: TO CREATE DOUBT WHERE THE SCIENCE IS SETTLED. BUT WE CANNOT AFFORD THIS BLINDNESS. NOT WHEN OUR PLANET IS LITERALLY ON FIRE!

THE REPORT’S CLAIMS ABOUT SEA LEVEL RISE AND ITS IMPACTS ON COASTAL COMMUNITIES ARE PARTICULARLY INFURIATING. IT DOWNPLAYS THE ACCELERATING RISE THAT THREATENS MILLIONS OF LIVES WORLDWIDE, CALLING IT “NO OBVIOUS ACCELERATION.” ASK THE COMMUNITIES IN MIAMI, NEW ORLEANS, OR THE PACIFIC ISLANDS IF THEY SEE NO ACCELERATION! THIS IS NOT ONLY SCIENTIFICALLY INCORRECT BUT A HEARTLESS INSULT TO THOSE ALREADY SUFFERING FROM COASTAL FLOODING AND STORM SURGES!

MAKE NO MISTAKE: THIS REPORT SERVES THE INTERESTS OF THOSE WHO WOULD SACRIFICE OUR PLANET FOR SHORT-TERM ECONOMIC GAIN. IT IS NOT SCIENTIFIC DEBATE; IT IS DELIBERATE MISINFORMATION AND MORAL BANKRUPTCY!

WE MUST ACT, NOT JUST TALK! JOIN THE FIGHT FOR OUR FUTURE! CALL OUT THIS MISINFORMATION FOR WHAT IT IS—A BETRAYAL OF EVERY FUTURE GENERATION!

THE TIME IS NOW. WE CANNOT LET THIS KIND OF DENIALISM SHAPE OUR CLIMATE POLICY. THE PLANET CAN’T WAIT FOR YOUR CONVENIENCE OR YOUR DENIAL! YOUR LEGACY WILL BE ONE OF DESTRUCTION UNLESS WE STAND TOGETHER AND DEMAND ACTION—REAL, MEANINGFUL, SCIENCE-BASED ACTION—NOW!