Friday Funny BONUS: Funniest Things Blamed on Climate Change?

What are the most ridiculous things the media has blamed climate change on? Heartland’s Andy Singer breaks down the thirty funniest claims the media has made yet.

Website referenced: http://www.numberwatch.co.uk/warmlist…

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Clyde Spencer
November 13, 2020 1:27 pm
leowaj
November 13, 2020 2:09 pm

My lawn died because of climate change.

Reply to  leowaj
November 13, 2020 5:44 pm

Do what I did.
Tear out the grass.
And plant weeds.
Nothing kills them.
They don’t need water.
You don’t need to mow them.
They are green.
The rabbits like them.
I don’t know why everyone doesn’t do this.

Kemaris
Reply to  Richard Greene
November 13, 2020 11:54 pm

Yeah, I found my house in the Mojave Desert has a small lawn composed of … Bermuda grass. Duh, duh, duh!.

Reply to  Kemaris
November 14, 2020 2:08 am

Bermuda grass? So, the bunnies go in, but they never come out?

Reply to  Richard Greene
November 14, 2020 2:11 am

If it ain’t edible, medicinal or practically useful, why waste water on it? But I still hope the ‘seventies climate terrorists were right, and we’ll see some more rain around these parts…

Doug Huffman
Reply to  Richard Greene
November 14, 2020 4:39 am

Many years ago, back at the beginning of teh interwebz, Uncle Al Schwartz told me that he had cemented his front yard, painted it green and artfully scattered rocks.

I miss Uncle Al and how that he is doing well.

Gunga Din
November 13, 2020 2:20 pm

I remember seeing that site years ago. Maybe even before I found WUWT.
Just what has CAGW promoters predicted/projected back then would happen by 2020 actually HAS happened?

Sara
November 13, 2020 2:30 pm

What species of spider is that? The biggest one we have is the Madagascar baboon spider, so I’m intrigued but don’t want that critter as a pet or neighbor.

D. J. Hawkins
Reply to  Sara
November 13, 2020 4:49 pm

I believe that is the common Araneae plasticus or possibly A. rubberium. They are frequently found near novelty and joke shops.

Mike McMillan
Reply to  D. J. Hawkins
November 13, 2020 5:56 pm

+1

Sara
Reply to  D. J. Hawkins
November 13, 2020 7:39 pm

Double plus ++1, DJH!

Jeff Alberts
Reply to  D. J. Hawkins
November 14, 2020 12:33 pm

Shirley you jest.

Patrick MJD
Reply to  Sara
November 13, 2020 4:55 pm

The Sydney (Australia) funnel web is a nasty, deadly, angry spider. If you see one splat it under your feet or it will chase you (Bad eyes apparently) down the street.

Thomho
Reply to  Patrick MJD
November 17, 2020 3:58 am

Wasn’t there an Aussie gal who was bitten on the funnel by a finger web spider ?

Mike Dubrasich
November 13, 2020 2:35 pm

Dear Gunga,

Without a doubt human brains have shrunken considerably. It might be correlation rather than direct causation, but you have to give the CAGW promoters credit where credit is due.

Sam Capricci
Reply to  Mike Dubrasich
November 13, 2020 5:26 pm

I guess that explains why we have a president elect Biden.

Doug Huffman
Reply to  Sam Capricci
November 14, 2020 4:40 am

Not so. That is not how US Presidential Election Timeline works.

Curious George
Reply to  Mike Dubrasich
November 13, 2020 6:47 pm

Most domesticated animals have brains 20-25% smaller than their wild cousins. We are being domesticated by a political party throwing a safety net over us.

https://www.livescience.com/60481-how-neanderthals-got-such-large-brains.html

Curious George
Reply to  Mike Dubrasich
November 13, 2020 6:51 pm

It would be a nice research project to find how much watching videos contributes to a brain shrinkage.

Jeff Alberts
Reply to  Mike Dubrasich
November 14, 2020 12:35 pm

I don’t think they’ve shrunk. I think they’re just so filled with social media, narcissism, virtue signaling, rebel without a cause nonsense, that there’s no room for common sense any more.

petroalbion
November 13, 2020 2:43 pm

The link to numberwatch web site does not work anymore

saveenergy
Reply to  petroalbion
November 13, 2020 3:20 pm

Try this … https://www.numberwatch.co.uk/warmlist.htm

Also read the footnote on that site !!

Herbert
Reply to  saveenergy
November 13, 2020 4:45 pm

saveenergy ,
Thanks. I had lost the link.
Everything from Acne to Zebra mis-carriages( so to speak).😄

Phil Salmon
November 13, 2020 4:11 pm

Can this be true?
A climate alarmist paper retracted for being too alarmist?? (Warming unstoppable, we’re all going to diiiiiiiieeeee – in Norwegian)

https://www.rt.com/op-ed/506655-eco-alarmists-climate-change-message/

a happy little debunker
November 13, 2020 4:18 pm

My Favorite
‘Not even the rain that falls isn’t actually going to fill our dam(n)s and our river systems’

ozspeaksup
Reply to  a happy little debunker
November 14, 2020 4:40 am

yeah flimflam outdid his silly self with that gem;-))

Sara
Reply to  clipe
November 14, 2020 5:21 am

Thank you for that link. It is a HOOT!

icisil
Reply to  clipe
November 14, 2020 6:44 am
Steve Case
November 13, 2020 5:33 pm
November 13, 2020 5:42 pm

Climate change heat caused my hair to fall out.
Climate change wind blew the toupee off my head.
A mangy dog grabbed it, and ran away with it in his mouth.
That was an expensive toupee.
Cost me $19.95, not including the glue.

Mike McMillan
Reply to  Richard Greene
November 13, 2020 5:59 pm

If the dog had mange, he may have needed it.

Joel O'Bryan
November 13, 2020 5:52 pm

Alex, I’ll take Name that Cougar for $100.

P.S.: RIP Alex.

Robert B
November 14, 2020 1:45 am

I visited the US in the mid nineties and found the Americans loved an Australian few Australians had heard of – Steve Irwin. I screwed up my face and the Yank went on about how he knows hardly any Aussies had heard of the guy but Americans love him. I said that I had heard of him but dismissed him as an idiot who would get himself killed. Sad to get that one right but boy did he press his luck, especially in the early days.

drednicolson
Reply to  Robert B
November 14, 2020 9:18 am

In the end, it wasn’t getting eaten by a crocodile or envenomed by a deadly snake that did him in (he had plenty of experience with handling those animals), but getting run through by a stingray, something outside his comfort zone.

When you call yourself the Crocodile Hunter, you might want to stick to crocs.

Jeff Alberts
Reply to  drednicolson
November 14, 2020 12:46 pm

“he had plenty of experience with handling molesting those animals”

Fixed it for you.

As an American, I never could stand the idiot or his family. You don’t learn about animals by watching some moron lay on top of them.

I remember watching a portion of one of his shows, only once. They had some grossly contrived scene where someone had forgotten to turn the light off in the room filled with giant snakes.

So, they filmed his wife entering the room. But, here’s the kicker, the light switch wasn’t by the door, oh no. It was ALL the way on the other side of the room. So she carefully tiptoed her way through giant snakes just to turn off a light, and back again.

I thought, “Really?? This is more contrived than professional wrestling, and not nearly as interesting.”

I don’t wish death on anyone (well, there might be a couple), but I’m glad he’s not out terrorizing poor animals any more. They can fend for themselves. It’s just a shame that his kids are taking up the moron mantle.

Bruce Cobb
November 14, 2020 4:22 am

We need a list of The Saddest Things Caused By The Fake Issue of Climate Change. 1. The children whose young lives are being ruined horribly by so-called adults filling their minds with Total Lies about how the planet is being destroyed by humans simply wanting to live comfortably, or even just wanting to survive. Greta Thunberg comes to mind, although she is getting close to adult status now. Her childhood was stolen from her, not by “Climate Change”, but by Total Lies about it. There is now even a documentary about her on Hulu, called “I Am Greta”. Here is the
trailer, which I did watch. I may watch the actual documentary, just out of curiosity. though I already know the story, and how it will be spun. In Greenie Weenie’s eyes, she is a modern-day Joan of Arc – part heroine, part martyr, sacrificing her childhood for the “Greater Good”, when in fact, she’s a victim of what can only be described as a horrendously evil ideology.

Just Jenn
Reply to  Bruce Cobb
November 14, 2020 7:48 am

and abuse

Rich Davis
Reply to  Bruce Cobb
November 14, 2020 8:24 am

Bruce,
Eleven or twelve centuries ago during Viking times, Greta would have been the mother of three most likely. At 17, nearly 18, she would be middle aged, with perhaps 15-20 winters ahead of her.

It is absurd to absolve young adults from their crimes as if they do not have any capacity for reason. A society that teaches victimhood begets amoral sociopaths and results in chaos.

drednicolson
Reply to  Rich Davis
November 14, 2020 9:09 am

Or would have died in childbirth, something all but unheard of in places with modern medicine.

A culture of death can only form in decadence, where living has become so easy that people lose sight of the value of life.

Peter
November 14, 2020 4:57 pm

Did you also notice the books in the background with the cover facing the camera? “Socialism is Evil”, “The Patriot’s Toolbox”, and “Capitalism” (the last one is not the entire title).
Can’t be a coindence that he chose those books.

Phil Salmon
November 14, 2020 6:38 pm

From NTZ/Jimbo, 30 opposite things caused by climate change:

https://notrickszone.com/2011/02/10/unfalsifiable-science-proof-of-climate-change/

Warmer Northern Hemisphere winters due to global warming
Colder Northern Hemisphere winters due to global warming

Global warming to slow down the Earth’s rotation
Global warming to speed up the Earth’s rotation

North Atlantic Ocean has become less salty
North Atlantic Ocean has become more salty

Avalanches may increase
Avalanches may decrease

Plants move uphill due to global warming
Plants move downhill due to global warming

Monsoons to become drier in India
Monsoons to become wetter in India

Plankton blooms
Plankton decline

Reindeer thrive
Reindeer decline

Less snow in Great Lakes
More snow in Great Lakes

Gulf stream slows down
Gulf stream shows “small increase in flow“

San Francisco more foggy
San Francisco less foggy

Less winter snow for Britain
More winter snow for Britain

Africa to get less rain
Africa to get more rain

Winds speed up [USA]
Winds slow down [USA]

Monsoons to become drier in India
Monsoons to become wetter in India

Bird migrations longer
Bird migrations shorter

Brian BAKER
November 15, 2020 9:52 am

Rush once had a programme where he read out and discussed every one of the claims

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