The Weather Channel to start applying monster names to hurricanes and tropical storms

FOR IMMEDIATE RELEASE  – June 3, 2014

ATLANTA – In response to the study just released from the University of Illinois at Urbana-Champaign, published in the Proceedings of the National Academy of Sciences, “Female hurricanes are deadlier than male hurricanes” (2014) doi: 10.1073/pnas.1402786111 , which suggested that female named storms don’t elicit enough alarm in the general populace, resulting in lower evacuation numbers, and in keeping with the practice that TWC pioneered of naming winter storms, TWC has decided to rename Northern Hemisphere tropical storms this year, using names taken from monsters and mythology.

The study found that for highly damaging storms, the more feminine the storm’s name, the more people it killed. The team’s analysis suggests that changing a severe hurricane’s name from the masculine “Charley” to the feminine “Eloise” could nearly triple its death toll.

The authors of the PNAS study said in their press release on the paper:

“In judging the intensity of a storm, people appear to be applying their beliefs about how men and women behave,” said Sharon Shavitt, a professor of marketing at Illinois and a co-author of the report. “This makes a female-named hurricane, especially one with a very feminine name such as Belle or Cindy, seem gentler and less violent.”

“If people in the path of a severe storm are judging the risk based on the storm’s name, then this is potentially very dangerous.”

Therefore, in the interest of public safety, TWC has decided to take the initiative and apply new names that will elicit action on the part of TWC viewers.

TWC spokesperson Tiffany Bleuhard said “While many people feel they can ride out storms, as we’ve seen from actual TWC operations in the field, the only people qualified to ride out hurricanes, tropical storms, and tornadoes are trained meteorologists. Our  goal is to make sure that they take these storms seriously enough to heed official warnings. We feel that by giving the storms names that are appropriate to their intensity and risk, people will take them more seriously and let the experts do their jobs.”

The alphabetical list of TWC named storms for 2014 follows.

###

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Through The Weather Channel, weather.com, Weather Underground, Intellicast.com and third-party publishing partners, the company provides millions of people every day with the world’s best weather forecasts, content and data, connecting with them through television, online, mobile and tablet screens. Through WSI and Weather Central, the company delivers superior professional weather services for the media, aviation, marine and energy sectors. The Weather Company is owned by a consortium made up of NBC Universal and the private equity firms The Blackstone Group and Bain Capital.


 

TWC 2014 NAMES OF TROPICAL STORMS (with sources and translations)

Abe Sapien (Hellboy)

Beisht Kione (Irish Mythology – “The Beast With a Black Head.“)

Cyclops (one eyed monster)

Dhampir (Serbian vampire)

Ekimmu (Mesopotamian A bloodsucking ghost that resembles a pale giant with a bull’s head on its shoulders.)

Futakuchi-onna (Japanese – Woman with a second mouth on the back of her head)

Godzilla (TWC received special license for this name in exchange for promoting the movie)

Hippogriff (Renaissance invention in Orlando Furioso)

Ichthyocentaur (sea-Centaur)

Jersey Devil (Demonic dragon that was given birth to by an American living in New Jersey)

Kasha (Japanese – Cat-like demon which descends from the sky and carries away corpses)

Leviathan (Jewish – Sea monster, as seen in Job 41)

Muldjewangk (Australian Aboriginal mythology – Water monster)

Nukekubi (Japanese – Disembodied, flying head that attacks people)

Ogre (Medieval folklore – Large, grotesque humanoid)

Pollo Maligno (Colombian – Man-eating chicken spirit)

Qalupalik (Inuit mythology – Aquatic human abductor)

Rồng – (Vietnamese – Dragon)

Shen (Chinese – Shapeshifing sea monster)

Toire-no-Hanakosan (Japanese – Ghost who lurks in grade school restroom stalls)

Unktehila (Lakota – Reptilian water monster)

Vântoase (Romanian – Female bad weather spirit)

Wanyūdō (Japanese – Demon in the form of a burning ox cart with a human head)

Xing Tian (Chinese – Headless giant)

Yamata no Orochi (Japanese – Gigantic, eight-headed serpent)

Zennyo Ryūō (Japanese – Rain-making dragon)

 

For those who have not noticed yet, it is clearly labeled below: “This entry was posted in Humor, Satire, The Weather Channel. ”

It is entirely a satirical fabrication, but as some have noted in comments, , it’s also plausible.

 

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June 3, 2014 2:25 pm

Stupid.

Amr Marzouk
June 3, 2014 2:28 pm

Am stocking up for the “man eating chicken spirit”.

Robert in Calgary
June 3, 2014 2:31 pm

Hmmm. Having a fun day are you….?

TimB
June 3, 2014 2:31 pm

Katrina kinda biases it a bit. And of course, male names are recent. Kinda stands to reason if Galveston hurricane and New Orleans hurricane were female names, nothing else matters.
Maybe they should do a study on which letter of the alphabet is the most dangerous and just skip that letter so people will live.

Data Soong
June 3, 2014 2:33 pm

Is this satirical? I sure hope so. (Though knowing how far astray TWC has gotten, I doubt it.)

TimB
June 3, 2014 2:35 pm

And can anyone tell me why The Weather Channel has turned it’s videos into a snuff film site? Is it really necessary to have videos of children being killed by trees on camping trips? It seems most of their latest coverage is all about the death of people in freak accidents.

bladeshearer
June 3, 2014 2:36 pm

Perhaps TWC will contribute one of these frightful names as a replacement for “climate change” or “global warming.” “Pollo Maligno,” or “Toire-no-Hankosan” might get us to take CAGW more seriously.

Janice Moore
June 3, 2014 2:36 pm

“Our goal is to make sure that they take these storms seriously… .”
LOL.

noloctd
June 3, 2014 2:41 pm

One assumes this is satire, but it gets harder and harder to tell the Onion from the scieintific press these days.

June 3, 2014 2:44 pm

To sad to be true.
(PS Are these to be the “official” names? I know that when TWC started to name winter storms (snow job Obama?) they asked the NWS to go along and were told, “Thanks but no thanks.”)

hunter
June 3, 2014 2:45 pm

lol. Send it to the White House. It would certainly be no less credible than what the climate obsessed have been promoting lately…..

June 3, 2014 2:45 pm

Abe Sapien was pretty wussy. Think I’ll ride that one out.

June 3, 2014 2:47 pm

Was it Ted Turner who bought TWC and helped turn it into a fear factory? Over the years I’ve noticed every snow storm is now “The Blizzard of (insert year)”. In fact every weather event is now extremely over hyped on TWC and elsewhere. I think the big boys have been priming the pump for this climate change hysteria for a couple decades now. Weaponized weather reports deserve monster names.

kadaka (KD Knoebel)
June 3, 2014 2:54 pm

Dhampir (Serbian vampire)
Clearly these people are quite comfortable with fantasy and science fiction, as they read, write, and believe such. But they have a regrettable deficiency of exposure to Marvel Universe lore, else they would have known of a being known by that term but not that definition.
Thankfully the Weather Channel is not interested in viewers about 40 and younger who may complain about differing from accepted recent terminology.

K. Russell
June 3, 2014 2:54 pm

This has a serious chance of backfiring. Americans are not frightened by monster names but instead would laugh at such nonsense. Maybe they should look into what causes complacency such as calling an evacuation then the storm changes course. The next storm that comes into the area nobody takes seriously because they already took the time, money and effort to evacuate the first time and in hind sight it was for naught.
REPLY: It’s satire – not a real press release, note the category it is posted under – Anthony

June 3, 2014 2:55 pm

TimB says:
June 3, 2014 at 2:35 pm
And can anyone tell me why The Weather Channel has turned it’s videos into a snuff film site? Is it really necessary to have videos of children being killed by trees on camping trips? It seems most of their latest coverage is all about the death of people in freak accidents.

========================================================================
Their “Local Weather on the 8’s” is becoming less and less reliable. Yesterday they said we were supposed to have thunderstorms today. I saw a few raindrops. That’s all.
If they aren’t showing Ice Road Tow-Truckers, all they focus on is a real storm that is happening. If there are no real storms in progress, they talk about past events like Sandy or Katrina or a drought somewhere with a carbon twist as the cause.

David Riser
June 3, 2014 2:56 pm

So apparently trained meteorologists are storm proof and capable of withstanding 150mph winds.
who knew?

george e. conant
June 3, 2014 2:57 pm

I am beginning to think the weather channel assigned people to monitor WUWT to get fresh ideas… monster names for hurricanes….really (eyes rolling)…. Have they offered up a name for the super El Nino yet?

June 3, 2014 3:01 pm

Naming El Ninos! Awesome idea, George!

Data Soong
June 3, 2014 3:03 pm

How about naming El Ninos after evil “Deniers”?!

Chuck Nolan
June 3, 2014 3:10 pm

Pollo Poco would be scary.
cn

June 3, 2014 3:10 pm

“man-eating chicken spirit” – I love it! Good for a laugh anyway! The world has gone mad.

tz2026
June 3, 2014 3:12 pm

Fortunately, I still only get Weather Nation, the channel.that has weather conditions and forecasts 24/7 instead of the infotainment and TruTV rejects
Damp hamper, I mean Dhampir is supposed to inspire more than confusion?
I would bet it is a hoax, but given it is TWC, I can’t be sure. They don’t take weather as seriously as ratings.

Latitude
June 3, 2014 3:14 pm

the only people qualified to ride out hurricanes, tropical storms, and tornadoes are trained meteorologists.
====
oh the irony

Berényi Péter
June 3, 2014 3:16 pm

There is a clear trend of hurricane names becoming increasingly more horrible, which indicates anthropogenic climate change, doesn’t it?
I just wonder if the Long Island Express was male or female?

Rud Istvan
June 3, 2014 3:16 pm

I have a ‘brilliant’ counter proposal for TWC. Name them all Hannibal Lecter. Scary, and not a female. You can do sequels just like the movies. Here comes Hannibal Lecter xx, worse than Hannibal Lector x…. Well, OK, as lame as TWC itself has become.
Second counter proposal. Unplug TWC. Permanently, as they seem now to be brain dead.

Billy Liar
June 3, 2014 3:21 pm

Spokesperson – ‘Tiffany Bleuhard’ ???????

June 3, 2014 3:21 pm

Anthony Watts says:
June 3, 2014 at 3:12 pm
For those who have not noticed yet, it is clearly labeled “This entry was posted in Humor, Satire, The Weather Channel. ”
It is entirely a satirical fabrication, but as some have noted, it’s also plausible.

====================================================================
True, I didn’t notice….but it is most definitely “plausible’ for TWC.
(Hurricane “Talking Boobs”?)

bw
June 3, 2014 3:24 pm

Too pathetic for serious response. Here’s my considered response.
Aah-choo. Booger. Chewbacka. Doody. Eepopporkahaah-etc. Fool. GAG-me. Hoo-ee. Imbecile.
Juicyfruit. Kowabunga. Looser. Mega-stupid. Noogy. OOOOPS. Purile. Que. Rin-Tin-Tin. Syrup.
Taa-Taa. Unusually-insipid. Vacuous. What? Xena. Ypsilanti. Zero.

Myron Mesecke
June 3, 2014 3:24 pm

The first hurricane that threatens the southern part of Texas really needs to be named Chupacabra.

Ack
June 3, 2014 3:26 pm
James the Elder
June 3, 2014 3:33 pm

Andrew was a cross dresser.

Paul Coppin
June 3, 2014 3:34 pm

If it were truly desirable to get the message out, the TWC would name them all “Heidi”

Geology Joe
June 3, 2014 3:34 pm

Just when you thought Obama-centric science couldn’t get possibly any dumberer. It surprises again with an amazing exhibition of even dumberitude-edness.

June 3, 2014 3:35 pm

Through The Weather Channel, weather.com, Weather Underground, Intellicast.com and third-party publishing partners, the company provides millions of people every day with the world’s best weather forecasts.

That is a flat-out lie. TWC couldn’t predict 12:30 at 12:00 noon, much less an accurate forecast 1 day ahead of time. That is obviously a hyperbole but nothing changes the fact that TWC is about ratings not accuracy, and the sad fact is they fail in both.

June 3, 2014 3:37 pm

I just noticed this was satire and I read the entire blog post. That was good satire because it was very close to the real thing. My points about TWC accuracy still stands.

Admin
June 3, 2014 3:44 pm

We are overdue for this classic.
http://youtu.be/mTb6CU3mhG0?t=15s

wws
June 3, 2014 3:45 pm

LOL. Abe Sapien???
But Cthulu has got to be on that list! And of course no entity can fill the “Y” slot better than Yog-Sothoth!

MattN
June 3, 2014 3:47 pm

This is from The Onion, right?

John Mann
June 3, 2014 3:49 pm

TWC spokesperson Tiffany Bleuhard said “While many people feel they can ride out storms, as we’ve seen from actual TWC operations in the field, the only people qualified to ride out hurricanes, tropical storms, and tornadoes are trained meteorologists.
I know she is real because I remember Tiffany from a James Bond movie!
“My name is Tiffany Bleuhard.”
“But of course you are my dear.”

DanMet'al
June 3, 2014 3:55 pm

Anthony Watts says:
June 3, 2014 at 3:12 pm
“For those who have not noticed yet, it is clearly labeled “This entry was posted in Humor, Satire, The Weather Channel. ””
Yes it was labelled as you say in gray 8 pt text just two lines above the 12 pt emboldened “Response Headline”. So you got me. . . but no hard feelings here! I guess in the future I should take more care to scour your posts to determine whether your post is serious or a spoof! You need to understand that maybe I’m gullible but actually nothing from the CAGW surprises me these days. . . no matter how absurd
Again. . . no complaint . . . you are championing what I believe is a noble cause!
Dan

Larry Ledwick
June 3, 2014 4:02 pm

What is really scary, is that it did not seem all that outside what I would expect from the weather channel.

John Archer
June 3, 2014 4:02 pm

Name them after politicians, IPCC offcials and klimate alarmists, NGO chiefs, Guardian columnists, islamic terrorists, serial killers … and any other thorough nasties.

Gamecock
June 3, 2014 4:04 pm

Here’s a problem. They name a storm Chernobyl as it crosses 40 degrees west. The storm turns north, and dissipates. No one will be afraid of Chernobyl anymore.
MOST named storms affect no one.

Karl Z.
June 3, 2014 4:07 pm

Anthony: mobile devices may cut off or omit the tags, which means an overly credulous person reading this on an iPhone might miss the point…
Oh, and…Bwahahahahahahahaha!
REPLY: I anticipated that. There are a couple of hints in the body of the story, name of the spokesperson for example. and the link under tornadoes. – Anthony

Louis
June 3, 2014 4:08 pm

Whoever composed that list of monster names inadvertently left off Susan from “Monsters and Aliens.”

Gary Pearse
June 3, 2014 4:13 pm

”Female hurricanes are deadlier than male hurricanes”
OMG! They say that people pay less attention to the danger if the H has a female name. Now how do you suppose this naming came to be? Do these clowns not understand that it is the political correctness (a branch of the ‘affirmative action’ policy carried to extremes) instituted by progressives that was applied to H naming? Do they not understand Hollywood’s been making films for a several decades where testosterone brimming, swinging-breasted sweathearts are kicking male ass on a regular basis? Do they not know that other studies show male sperm counts have been stomped down by Gloria Steinem and Germaine Greer and the ladies are now impregnating themselves. Do they not know that when women adopted panty hose, pansy jokes were being made about Batman and Robin? Sheesh! Of course they know or they would have switched back to male names to protect the stupid from H.

urederra
June 3, 2014 4:14 pm

Woman with two mouths, These japanese know how to scare people.

June 3, 2014 4:15 pm

I for one welcome our catastrapharian overlords and egarly await the arrival of super-storm Ummagumma Jr. and pray it’ll wash the deniers into the burning sea.

MattN
June 3, 2014 4:23 pm

The best satire is the satire that is not far from the truth.

Tom in Florida
June 3, 2014 4:35 pm

I think we should follow the spirit of George Foreman and name them all George.
But seriously, the reason for naming storms is because if there multiple tropical systems active in the area at the same time it is much easier to remember which storm you are concerned with by referring to it by name rather than by number. It also makes it easier to identify what happened to an area affected by a storm when referring to a name rather than a number. Everyone in
SW Florida remembers Charley; where it was, what it did and when it happened. If it was simply Tropical system #3 of 2004, who would remember which storm it was.

Gary Pearse
June 3, 2014 4:36 pm

Okay, now I get it. But how is a person to tell these days in this science, especially when CAGW proponents have shown that they don’t even own a sense of humor. What goes for the real thing is actually stupider than this ‘study’.Recall the list of things caused by global warming!
http://www.washingtontimes.com/news/2013/feb/25/think-tanks-link-arab-spring-global-warming/?utm_source=RSS_Feed&utm_medium=RSS
Arab Spring actually coincided with the last 10yrs of cooling.
http://news.bbc.co.uk/earth/hi/earth_news/newsid_8560000/8560694.stm
Birds are shrinking! I guess they’ve never been to a real warm country and seen ostriches!
Here is a thousand more!! http://whatreallyhappened.com/WRHARTICLES/globalwarming2.html

JimS
June 3, 2014 4:45 pm

I think all the storms should be named for AGWer alarmists. It should scare the bejezus out of us all: Gore Storm; Monster Mann; Hansen Hell.
Shivers to think of them all….

kadaka (KD Knoebel)
June 3, 2014 4:57 pm

Should have used Dentata. Lots of men humbled and killed. Very terrifying!

June 3, 2014 4:58 pm

I didn’t see ManBearPig on the list? LOL

Rob
June 3, 2014 5:04 pm

Boo…
Their ratings must be tanking-Lol

george e. conant
June 3, 2014 5:31 pm

Anthony, you ruined my aghast ! Here I thought they were for real…. oh wait …. never mind….

RoHa
June 3, 2014 5:34 pm

Learning to pronounce them all will lead to a big improvement in the linguistic and elocution skills of TV presenters, especially if some Aztec and Mayan monsters are included.

Gary
June 3, 2014 5:36 pm

C’mon, who made these up? Freakin’ hilarious. There’s a reason this blog is so popular. The wit, it HURTS! IT HURTS!

David Ball
June 3, 2014 5:37 pm

And the scariest monster name of all ; The Weather Channel.

RoHa
June 3, 2014 5:38 pm

Why do the give the storms names anyway? In Japan they just say “typhoon 1”, “typhoon 2”, and so on throughout the season.

David Hockenberry
June 3, 2014 5:40 pm

[snip -language – mod]

Louis Hooffstetter
June 3, 2014 5:50 pm

“So apparently trained meteorologists are storm proof and capable of withstanding 150 mph winds; who knew?”
Well Duh! Apparently you’ve never seen Jim Cantore in action.
As much as I hate the Weather Channel, I love Jim Cantore’s reports from the eye of the storm. I’m secretly terrified that in the middle of some future hurricane report, the canopy of a convenience store is going to come crashing down and smash him like a bug in front of millions of viewers.
Jim, take care of yourself buddy.

June 3, 2014 5:53 pm

I would laugh out loud if the name manbearpig was listed.

June 3, 2014 5:54 pm

HOw about they just name them after Climate scientists in the Consensus? That will serve 2 purposes. Make them household names. And give them something to discuss that they are competent in.

June 3, 2014 6:00 pm

My already excellent day got 5 percent better when I read this.
Don’t forget: Literalism kills.

Rick Bradford
June 3, 2014 6:02 pm

This is quite appropriate — since climate change alarmism is running rampant, quite out of control, calling hurricanes things like Godzilla fits very nicely.

Ann in L.A.
June 3, 2014 6:05 pm

Is it April 1?

Ray Hudson
June 3, 2014 6:09 pm

I don’t see the name of our dark, powerful lord and savior, Cthulu…..WUWT?
Ray

June 3, 2014 6:11 pm

The Weather Channel is what you get when you hire the people who couldn’t hack the strict fact-checking regime at MTV.

kadaka (KD Knoebel)
June 3, 2014 6:20 pm

From Louis Hooffstetter on June 3, 2014 at 5:50 pm:

I’m secretly terrified that in the middle of some future hurricane report, the canopy of a convenience store is going to come crashing down and smash him like a bug in front of millions of viewers.

Don’t worry, I’m certain they have him on a delay so they can bleep out those close call “Whoa! What the **** was THAT?! Oh ****, here comes another!” moments.
So if they suddenly say “Oops, looks like we lost the satellite feed. We apologize as we don’t know when we will be getting it back …”

Editor
June 3, 2014 6:27 pm

No Jabberwock? Aww. Whine. Okay, so Tenniel drew him with a vest. He’s a British monster, so he needs some class.
One of the most often reproduced images!
https://www.google.com/search?q=jabberwocky+tenniel&source=lnms&tbm=isch

Editor
June 3, 2014 6:29 pm

Here are a couple names that might be worth comparing – Maximus and Minnie. I’d definitely get out of Max’s way.

Reply to  Ric Werme
June 4, 2014 11:25 am

@Ric Werme

Maximus and Minnie.

Why not Mickey and Minnie? After all, who would really be scared of a Mickey Mouse storm?

Louis Hooffstetter
June 3, 2014 6:32 pm

“How about they just name them after Climate scientists in the Consensus? That will serve 2 purposes. Make them household names.”
Yes!: Feel the fear of Franken-Storm Hurricane Hansen, Hurricane Hayhoe, Hurricane Mann, Hurricane Oppenheimer, Hurricane Gavin, or Hurricane Weather Bimbo (Heidi Cullen), yada, yada, yada…
Just please don’t name them after any of the SkS idiots. No Hurricanes Cookie, NutterJelly, or Lewandowsky. That would stroke their egos waaay too much.

June 3, 2014 7:04 pm

If it’s humor we’re attempting, then wouldn’t the government have named the first weather monster Anthony Watts? Aren’t you a threat to public safety? 😉

Ed, Mr. Jones
June 3, 2014 7:08 pm

It would be nice if we could rename Climate Scientists with names from Animated Comedy, TO BETTER REFLECT THE AMOUNT OF ALARM THE PUBLIC OUGHT TO HAVE IN RESPONSE TO THEIR DRIVEL, Goofy, Daffy, Elmer, Bugs, Wile-E, etc.

Geology Joe
June 3, 2014 7:10 pm

Today’s satire is tomorrow’s White House policy press release. Please don’t give them more ideas.

Steve from Rockwood
June 3, 2014 7:13 pm

Hurricane Obama. The longest, most costly hurricane in US history.

kadaka (KD Knoebel)
June 3, 2014 7:19 pm

Ric Werme said on June 3, 2014 at 6:29 pm:

Here are a couple names that might be worth comparing – Maximus and Minnie. I’d definitely get out of Max’s way.

Would you get out of her way if you used the last part of her name, Ball?

Ed, Mr. Jones
June 3, 2014 7:20 pm

The only climate change I’ve seen is that the steady stream of lies that heretofore ’emanated’ from Washington, DC is now a steady-state Tsunami.

Steve Lohr
June 3, 2014 7:23 pm

Hey really, what kind of drug can cause you to come up with a “man eating chicken spirit” hooooweee depity dog! Are we are witnessing crowd-sourced insanity? I knew a woman who was absolutely terrified of chickens. Now that I think about it, if you stop to study them they can sort of give you the willies. I have to admit, if I thought I was being chased by a man eating chicken spirit storm, hum, uh huh, I would run away for sure!

Bill W
June 3, 2014 7:33 pm

Hurricane Pollo Maligno!!! OH NO!!! RUN!!!
Wait! We’ll send Colonel Saunders to fight for us! Yay! Global Warming and Deadly Storms defeated and turned into tasty chicken! Win-Win, I say…
Hmmm- that might make a good SyFy TV movie…

Editor
June 3, 2014 7:39 pm

kadaka (KD Knoebel) says:
June 3, 2014 at 7:19 pm

Ric Werme said on June 3, 2014 at 6:29 pm:
Here are a couple names that might be worth comparing – Maximus and Minnie. I’d definitely get out of Max’s way.
Would you get out of her way if you used the last part of her name, Ball?

No, but I’d open the door for her. 🙂
Or were you talking about a Civil War era bullet, as in http://www.historynet.com/minie-ball ?

Pathway
June 3, 2014 8:01 pm

Where is Vlad the Impaler.

lee
June 3, 2014 8:03 pm

They forgot Cookie, he was always my favourite monster.

SIGINT EX
June 3, 2014 8:24 pm

In the late 90s I had the opportunity to live in Japan, briefly over one summer.
At that time typhoons were called by number … that changed in 2000.
I much preferred calling the typhoons by number, as it seemed more accurate and scientific than the USA preference of human names, mostly girls names for some reason only known by NOAA.
In 2000 JMA started preferentially using human hames, like USA, for typhoons instead of numbers.
In the 90s I was an avid Anime fan. An Anime of that time had a episode about a typhoon
hitting the Tokyo Metropolitan region and a “car nut” takes to the expressways and the Police on motorcycles must pursue.
Although I did experience two typhoons, I did not have a car nor license to drive. So I cannot confirm “nuts on the roads during a typhoon” no matter the “name” nor number.
🙂

kadaka (KD Knoebel)
June 3, 2014 8:25 pm

From Ric Werme on June 3, 2014 at 7:39 pm:

Or were you talking about…

*sigh*
Once again, the attempted gentle prodding of interested minds into inquisitiveness and investigation by use of a curious phonetic quirk, is ruthlessly thwarted by the excessively verbose.

pat
June 3, 2014 9:16 pm

seems “Years of Living Dangerously”/Showtime didn’t make the Top 100 ….yet again:
3 June: TVbythenumbers: Monday Cable
http://tvbythenumbers.zap2it.com/2014/06/03/monday-cable-ratings-love-hip-hop-atlanta-wins-night-monday-night-raw-hit-the-floor-swamp-people-more/269763/
what a production at The Atlantic! down in the comments someone links to a website that apparently debunks the claims in the article:
3 June: The Atlantic: Adam Weymouth: When Global Warming Kills Your God
Twenty-three Alaskan tribesmen broke the law when they overfished king salmon, but they claim their faith gave them no other choice.
Photos by Loren Holmes.
http://www.theatlantic.com/features/archive/2014/06/when-global-warming-kills-your-god/372015/

kadaka (KD Knoebel)
June 3, 2014 9:22 pm

Pathway said on June 3, 2014 at 8:01 pm:

Where is Vlad the Impaler.

Still in Moscow, last I noticed. And that’s what he wants his lovers to call him.

accordionsrule
June 3, 2014 9:34 pm

What do you name a hurricane to make people not want to ride it out?
How about-
IRS Audit
Proctologist Exam
Broccoli
Bad Hair Day
Accordion Band
Help me out here…

Evan Jones
Editor
June 3, 2014 9:48 pm

Echidna. Tethys. Circe. Hera. Medea. Medusa.

Evan Jones
Editor
June 3, 2014 10:05 pm

Ric Werme says:
June 3, 2014 at 7:39 pm (Edit)

Hullo, Ric. You’re a fellow wargamer. (Load up on guns, bring your friends. It’s fun to lose and to pretend.) Tell these dudes about simulation of complex, chaotic models. Explain to them about top-down modeling and storyboarding.
They can’t hear me.
They are under some mad delusion they can model climate from the bottom up using Billion-Dollar Babies. yes, they think they can do the East Front using ASL. And all they gotta do to fix it is tweak the echo fire rules. Tell them they’re barking up the wrong tree. They won’t listen to me.
What this sort of job calls for is a pencil and the back of an envelope. They can’t grasp that. They think they can somehow match complexity with complexity. Tell ’em.

kadaka (KD Knoebel)
June 3, 2014 10:11 pm

So the female storms are more dangerous since people fear male storms more.
And what happens when a named storm decides it’d rather be the other type? Why are there no procedures for the storm to change its name?
Why all the hating for transgendered storms?
Come on now, you ignorant old bigots! Be progressive, Get With The NOW!
#StopStormSexDiscrimination

Hoser
June 3, 2014 10:21 pm

How about –
Ammiano, Boxer, Clinton, Eshoo, Feinstein, Hillary (second time, wait for it), Gavin, Jackson-Lee, Maxine, Newsome (so repulsive he deserves to be listed twice, but a toss up with Nancy), Pelosi, Rodham (for our first-place contestant, so truly horrible, the only one listed thrice – even beating out Harry Reid), Sheila (so scary she had to be in the list twice), Wasserman-Schultz
And of course I’m partisan today (actually, I’m always partisan), because it’s election day, so give me a break.

kadaka (KD Knoebel)
June 3, 2014 10:35 pm

@ Hoser on June 3, 2014 at 10:21 pm:
Good news on the election results from about 1AM EDT (10PM PDT)


As results from precincts began to be reported to Sacramento, just before 10 p.m. Gov. Jerry Brown held 55.3 percent of votes, with his Republican challenger Neel Kashkari coming in with 17.6 precent, followed by Assemblyman Tim Donnelly with 14.8 percent.

By 8 p.m., the Los Angeles Times was calling the race in favor Democratic incumbents Brown, Lt. Gov. Gavin Newsom and state Attorney General Kamala Harris, and was reporting that Insurance Commissioner Dave Jones, another Democrat, also likely advanced to the Nov. 4 general election.

If you like your incompetent morons, you can keep your incompetent morons.

June 3, 2014 10:44 pm

It is sad to live in a world where appearance has (or is thought to have) more impact than facts on the behavior of people.

pat
June 3, 2014 10:52 pm

in australia today, the MSM is spinning the (Frank) Lowy Institute poll with headlines about how much more concerned aussies are about the URGENCY of climate change action. it’s all smoke & mirrors of course, to tie in with Australia’s upcoming votes on repealing the carbon tax. CAGW- activist ABC is even predicting our concern will go up again in next year’s Poll!
4 June: ABC: Sara Phillips: Concern for climate change is rising
With concern about climate change showing a rise for the last two years of the Lowy Poll, indications are that it will rise again in 2015.
Agreement that climate change should be addressed has not dipped below 80 per cent since the poll began, but the urgency with which it is addressed has fallen…
Back in 2006, 68 per cent of us agreed with the statement “Global warming is a serious and pressing problem. We should begin taking steps now even if this involves significant costs.”
In 2014, that’s down to 45 per cent. But it’s an increase from its all-time low of 36 per cent in 2012…
***Most commentators on the Direct Action Plan have doubted its ability to deliver emissions reductions at a reasonable cost.
Accordingly, concern about climate change has risen again this year.
By next year, we should see a rise again in concern on this measure.
The senate changes over on July 1, just days away. When the new senators take their seats on the rose-coloured leather, the house will be controlled by a motley crew of minor parties, the most significant of which is Clive Palmer’s PUPs. Mr Palmer has given no indication yet of whether his PUPs will vote for or against the repeal of the carbon tax. But given that some of Mr Palmer’s business interests lie in mining, and that he’s been loath to pay his carbon tax debt, there is a sense is that he could order the PUPs to support the repeal.
This would leave Australia’s climate commitments in the hand of the Direct Action Plan.
Given the Direct Action Plan’s current lack of support from ***independent experts and its as-yet-incomplete status, by March 2015, the policy is likely still to be settling in. No evidence of its success (or failure) would be available to assuage the concerns of the — currently 83 per cent — of Australians who believe that climate change should be addressed.
It is unlikely that by March 2015 Australians will be feeling confident that our government is sufficiently managing climate change.
If this is the case, we can expect to see the Lowy poll register another rise in concern about climate change in 2015.
http://www.abc.net.au/environment/articles/2014/06/04/4018585.htm
Sara’s MOST COMMENTATORS links to only CSIRO as critic.
7 March: ABC: CSIRO casts doubt on key aspect of Government’s Direct Action plan
http://www.abc.net.au/news/2014-03-07/doubt-cast-on-governments-climate-change-plan/5305208
Sara’s INDEPENDENT EXPERTS links to August 2013 ABC piece:
ABC: Coalition’s direct action climate plan could cost extra $4B: new modelling
And a new analysis of that by Monash University together with projects firm Sinclair Knight Merz has found that emissions will rise under the Coalition’s plan by 9 per cent by 2020…
The Climate Institute paid for the modelling. Its CEO is John Connor.
JOHN CONNOR: This, like other independent public assessments before it, shows that unfortunately it only can achieve an increase in pollution, not a decrease…
SABRA LANE: The Opposition’s climate action spokesman Greg Hunt was travelling this morning and unavailable for interview. He told Fairfax the modelling was unprofessional, from a partisan organisation…
http://www.abc.net.au/am/content/2013/s3826010.htm

pat
June 3, 2014 10:54 pm

***Varney ignoring the WaPo/ABC/Langer Research poll this week claiming americans want CAGW action at any cost:
2 June: Times-Picayune: James Varney: President Obama vs. global warming and the people
Alarum within. Enter KING (Barack Obama). To think those were once stage directions. The play has indeed become the thing.
The glorious moment in American history when Obama was elected president is ancient history. All that calming oceans and healing planet stuff is in the past, and now instead of blind obedience he too often finds his subjects and the nobility standing athwart his noble intent.
His imperial approach to governing manifested itself in a big way this week when Obama unveiled his unilateral plan to save the earth from global warming. Or at least cripple a piece of the American energy sector because, well, global warming.
***There was no clamor or desire for this on the part of many American people — global warming consistently ranks nowhere on their list of priorities. But this unwanted and expensive gesture is of a piece with Obama’s perception of government.
For the weird truth is, at this moment, the United States has a president who doesn’t care what Americans think. He’s not interested in doing anything they want him to do. The desires and the priorities of the little people are of no moment to the great man…
The president of the United States clearly is detached, issuing royal global warming edicts that succor only a rich fringe. Barack Obama seeks to impose unilaterally a policy with huge repercussions on the American economy that would be unlikely to pass a co-equal branch of government.
What’s more, the whole exercise is pointless in terms of its alleged morally superior purpose. As no less enthusiastic an Obama cheerleader than The New York Times declared, “by itself, the president’s plan will barely nudge the global emissions that scientists say are threatening the welfare of future generations.”
This is politics without a smidgeon of progressivism. Instead, his proposals are regressive and punitive. In Shakespearean tragedies, it’s usually the king that takes the fall. Must America take the fall after destroying the notion of royal rule?
http://www.nola.com/opinions/index.ssf/2014/06/president_obama_vs_global_warm.html

Jeef
June 3, 2014 11:23 pm

All of a sudden the backstory for the movie ‘Idiocracy’ seems more plausible!

lee
June 4, 2014 12:58 am

How do you confuse the issue? Name it Alex- they won’t know whether they’re Arthur or Martha

June 4, 2014 1:14 am

Pollo? A chicken storm? Scary.

June 4, 2014 1:20 am

Some one put a Dhampir on that storm.

Gamecock
June 4, 2014 4:02 am

I need an anatomy lesson: how can they tell a female hurricane from a male hurricane?

John F
June 4, 2014 4:39 am

Tell me this is a joke.

D. Cohen
June 4, 2014 5:50 am

I’m with Hoser — use the last names of politicians. That should be scary enough for anyone.

Jim Clarke
June 4, 2014 6:00 am

So, here is the question…is it possible to come up with something about climate change that is soooo absolutely ridiculous that everyone knows that it must be sarcasm?
Apparently not

Coach Springer
June 4, 2014 6:38 am

First as farce …
Hurricane Koch, Tornado Halliburton, Storm Surge Steyn.

Chris4692
June 4, 2014 6:59 am

All those female hurricanes are getting together with all those male hurricanes and producing more hurricanes. We didn’t have that problem until there were both types.

June 4, 2014 7:14 am

Gamera is the friend to all children.

June 4, 2014 7:34 am

SIGINT EX says:
June 3, 2014 at 8:24 pm
I much preferred calling the typhoons by number, as it seemed more accurate and scientific than the USA preference of human names, mostly girls names for some reason only known by NOAA.
http://www.aoml.noaa.gov/hrd/tcfaq/B1.html
In 2000 JMA started preferentially using human hames, like USA, for typhoons instead of numbers.
No, the practice in the WPac is to use an international list of terms contributed by all
Pacific nations. Not all are human names, many are words for flowers, foods, or chickens :
http://www.aoml.noaa.gov/hrd/tcfaq/B2.html

Tom Stone
June 4, 2014 8:29 am

Satirizing The Weather Channel is like satirizing The Daily Show or SNL’s Weekend Update. All three are already satires, although many people (Including Jon Stewart) do not know that.

ben
June 4, 2014 8:44 am

re Anthony’s comment: “For those who have not noticed yet, it is clearly labeled “This entry was posted in Humor, Satire, The Weather Channel. ”
“It is entirely a satirical fabrication, but as some have noted, it’s also plausible.”
—————-
That is not clear where Humor and Satire are noted. When viewing the home screen view and scrolling down to the article, do not see any reference to satire.
We need to be better than this. The satire is fine. But, individuals who don’t see any notification that it is satire may not trust info from this site. This site has too high of a reputation to not bend over backwards to not put out false information. April Fools Day would be the exception.
Do not even see a disclaimer anywhere in the story. Not a good thing, imo.
Enjoy the satire. But don’t like the lack of clear disclosure.

mpainter
June 4, 2014 9:12 am

Yes, but wil they be female monsters or male monsters?

Man Bearpig
June 4, 2014 10:01 am

What about hurricane ‘boo boo bear’ or hurricane ‘tweety pie’ ?

Greg Roane
June 4, 2014 11:25 am

I dont necessarily agree with the premise of the study, nor the findings. It seems counter intuitive.
EVERYONE knows that Mother Nature (aka Gaia) can be a Royal “B” AND that MANkind has been – according to the Greeny Crowd – “raping and defiling” her for some time now AND Hell hath no fury like a woman scorned… so, calling these storms by a female name is accurate and SHOULD be scary as all get-out.
I mean, imagine “Hurricane/Cyclone/Typhoon Lorena Bobbit/Lizzy Borden” forecast to make landfall at a location near you. I dont know about you, but I would not wait around to see what damage she could do!

Robert W Turner
June 4, 2014 12:22 pm

The History Channel could keep them stocked up on fresh monster names! …Hurricane Wampus Beast is expected to make landfall this Saturday…and in related news thousands of confused Hillbillies showed up on the beach in droves proclaiming that they were going to catch the Wampus Beast once and for all. Okay, this could backfire.

June 4, 2014 12:41 pm

“It is entirely a satirical fabrication, but as some have noted in comments, , it’s also plausible.”
And that’s the truly scary thing…

Walt Allensworth
June 4, 2014 3:20 pm

Was discouraged to note that Kracken didn’t make the list!

schitzree
June 4, 2014 4:45 pm

All right. On the one hand this seem like plain warmist propoganda. On the other I for one am really looking forword to hearing an actual TV news reporter telling us ” OH NO! GODZILLA IS COMING ASHORE AND WILL DISTROY THE CITY!”

June 4, 2014 4:59 pm

TimB said in part on June 3, 2014 at 2:31 pm:
“Katrina kinda biases it a bit. And of course, male names are recent. Kinda stands to reason if Galveston hurricane and New Orleans hurricane were female names, nothing else matters.”
I think I need to see the study and its methodology, and see if excluding Katrina removes the trend of female storms being more dangerous. Or, if the study includes years when all Atlantic tropical cyclones were female, and weather prediction technology was not as good as it is now. I would be surprised if the public takes female storms less seriously than male ones. My impression is that the public pays attention to hurricanes, and pays attention to them.

June 4, 2014 5:02 pm

Followup by me: drroyspencer.com mentions the study, and says that outlier storms such as Katrina were excluded from the study.

RoHa
June 4, 2014 9:48 pm

@ Rick Werme
“No Jabberwock? Aww. Whine. Okay, so Tenniel drew him with a vest.”
Ahem! He’s British. Tenniel drew him with a waistcoat.

Cris
June 4, 2014 9:54 pm

But people still won’t be afraid enough of Cookie and Pikachu.

Hot under the collar
June 5, 2014 9:58 am

Missed out the biggest monster of all.
The EPA monster?

Gary Hladik
June 5, 2014 11:31 am

“Release the Kraken!”

Anon Emouse
June 5, 2014 11:04 pm

I wouldn’t be surprised, that due to “political” “correctness” some day, some weather entity starts using names we can’t pronounce rather than common english familiar names, emphasis on FAMILIAR.

Brian H
June 16, 2014 12:08 pm

Sharkenado has done for the strategy, reducing it to the category of Hollywood Goofiness.